Hello all,

As part of my somewhat recent promotion I am required to complete a series of 48 different short writings/analysis on a variety of topics. We are instructed that some should be solely based upon our own thoughts while others should be researched and the thoughts of others considered before writing on the topic.

One such topic that requires the contemplation of the thoughts of others is an analysis of Coaching vs Mentoring vs Counseling, primarly how these processes differ from each other.

I am completely aware of the breadth of knowledge and experience this forum has to offer and I'd like to use that as a baseline for this portion of my assignment. Call it background info.

So, if you'd care to participate, what do you see as the differences between Mentoring, Counseling, and Coaching? I admit that upon first reading this prompt I thought they were very much similar with only minor differences. Obvioslly, that is not the answer they are looking for.

I suppose Counseling has a somewhat more "disciplinary" connotation in my mind... maybe we could say it is more reactionary than it is proactive.

As far as coaching vs mentoring, I am having a hard time seeing a significant difference.

Does anybody care to comment?

Starting with the basics:
Counsel = give advice to someone/ recommend a course of action / give professional psychological help and advice

Coach = train or instruct a team or player / give someone extra or private teaching / teach a subject or sport as a coach / prompt or urge someone with instructions

Mentor = advise or train someone especially a younger colleague

With the above in mind, all three are very similar. I am just going to free flow some thoughts that come to mind....

I think individuals will see each depending on where they are in life, experience, and career.

The easy out would be that most view counseling as being wrapped in emotions and how to deal with them. Usually, one seeks out a counselor to listen to them and potentially present a tool that would help resolve something. It is more about self reflection and interaction. This perhaps wanders toward a goal. Typically a one to one setting. Paid for service by the individual. You go to them off site and they aren't typically involved in the day to day of the one being counseled.

Coaching is going to be very intense and could well hurt one's feelings. The coach might not be a subject matter expert, but they are well versed in the subject. They will likely present the materials repeatedly regardless of the receiver's understanding or execution until they see the desired performance. I would see this occurring in more of a group setting though individual coaching is possible. Paid for service by the organization. Someone might be brought into an environment to coach a group or individuals to get the desired results.

Mentoring is more of a taking someone under your wing to show them something. In my mind, a mentor would be someone you look up to and aspire to be. You build a relationship with them and try to learn from them in a way that would make the mentor proud of you. I see this as a mutually beneficial relationship without the exchange of money.

Like I said, just some random thoughts shaken from my mind. Use them as desired. I don't guarantee them to be accurate, but simply thoughts of an unknown person on the internet.

Here's where I see the differences:

Counseling: The focus is on changing/improving negative or sub-par behavior of an individual. This is generally a formal, documented process.

Mentoring: The focus is on personal/professional growth of employees (making good employees better). The beneficiary is the mentee - not the company. Mentoring is generally done one-on-one, but I have seen group sessions (very rare). This is generally the most informal, possibly being done after hours or away from work. An example would be the older employee sharing pearls of wisdom with newer folks. The mentor does not need to be (and is often not) the mentee's boss.

Coaching: The focus is getting a team to work better together toward a company goal. Coaching could be to either fixing sub-par team dynamics or pushing a good team toward higher heights. This is always led by a boss, supervisor, or team leader.

Within the substance use disorder recovery (not treatment) arena:

Counseling -- is clinical in nature. Set terms of required education and training, licensure and/or certification/credentialing; lived experience is not applicable or is not emphasized. Methods of creating specified outcomes can vary, but are prescribed as formal practice. There is a hierarchy of counselor ---> patient/client. Results are achieved from the outside (counselor) to the inside (patient).

Mentoring -- is non-professional in nature (i.e.- not being paid specifically for the job of being a mentor; it could be an adjunct condition of a position). Very individualized in nature and scope; lived experience is paramount but in certain situations, not required; specific education and training are not prescribed to achieve mentor status. The relationship does have a hierarchy, albeit not as pronounced.

Coaching -- can be professional or non-professional in nature. Lived experience is not only paramount, but required in most roles; Specific terms of education/training are very basic and foundational in nature, which points to the lived experience of the coach as being of value; extremely individualized in nature. Results are achieved from the inside (patient/client) to the outside (recovery coach) based upon what the client/patient believes to be the best solution or path, and the client/patient making the decision to proceed down the chosen path. No (or minimal) hierarchy is present in a peer-to-peer relationship.

In a nutshell.

Funny - my entire career has been influenced in interpretation of "counsel" based on first post-grad job at Arthur Andersen.

There people were occasionally "counseled out." This was an idiom for helping someone to understand that they weren't likely to find their most successful career path at the firm, usually in a meeting with a senior manager or partner, followed by a walk to the elevator where someone had conveniently already gathered any of your personal effects for you into a box.

Tough gig.

Lots of good detail above.

My simplistic view is:
Mentoring is strategic and directional. Mentoree determines tactics. More like a manager.

Coaching is tactical. More like a supervisor.

Counseling is exploratory and leading a person down trains of thought that enables him to make a personal decision. More like a teacher.

I see coaching as being more tactical in nature. Do this thing like this in the here and now.

I feel that mentoring is strategic in nature and has more of a long term mindset.

ETA: Funny, I didn't read konata88's post before I posted. Great mind...

The three blend in some ways.

I think of mentoring as helping someone bring out their innate abilities to have them stand on their own two feet.

For consideration of the idea, you might find The One Minute Manager interesting.

It is more of a hardback, quick-read pamphlet than a book and was a number one best seller.

Your thread caught my attention because I just this week gave away a copy to someone.

It's partly a quick story of how a young man learns what good management is all about as he learns to get the best out of his supervisors, subordinates and himself to make an effective team.

quote:

Originally posted by thumperfbc:
One such topic that requires the contemplation of the thoughts of others is an analysis of Coaching vs Mentoring vs Counseling, primarly how these processes differ from each other.

I admit that upon first reading this prompt I thought they were very much similar with only minor differences. Obvioslly, that is not the answer they are looking for.

I guess you've figured out that nothing could be further from the true...which is why they are asking the question.

But I doubt they are looking for the "right" answer, rather they are looking for "your" answer...to determine your personality and style

quote:

I suppose Counseling has a somewhat more "disciplinary" connotation in my mind... maybe we could say it is more reactionary than it is proactive.

This reflects your management style. Your response is more reactive than proactive, but Counseling can be either.

quote:

As far as coaching vs mentoring, I am having a hard time seeing a significant difference.

These are as different as the difference between an instructor and a teacher

Counseling is a Empowering skill...encouraging and acknowledging. Letting them be heard and finding their own path

Coaching is a Instructing skill...demonstrating, evaluating performance, and correcting. Showing how something should be done

Mentoring is a Guiding skill. Determining the optimal path to reach goals when considering strengths and weaknesses. How to address weaknesses

Mentoring - Guiding someone towards improvement by using yourself and your experience as an example. More like a role model. Involves more showing. "Do as I do."

Coaching - Direct instruction to achieve a specific goal or improvement. More like a teacher/instructor. Involves more telling. "Do as I say".

Counseling - Helping someone by facilitating them exploring the challenge and then make the decisions themselves. More like a sounding board. Involves more listening. "What do you think you should do?"

Counseling: Assistance in resolving conflict (e.g., inner, interpersonal, legal)

Coaching: Exhortation to achieve optimal performance

Mentoring: Guidance on understanding issue (e.g., conflict, performance, romance, talent)

I don't want to read the other responses before I give you mine.

One aspect I see that captures the differences between the three is the amount of interaction / guidance between the person doing the action and the recipient.

The least amount of interaction is the counseling. Counseling often revolves around addressing one issue and only involves other areas only in so far as it affects the one issue. Counseling is hands-off or arm's length. It is helping the counselee to form and understand the issue statement, what factors may be affecting the issue, and what actions should the counselee take to resolve the issue. For example, you may counsel a subordinate for habitually being late. You help him see that being late isn't good for the company and himself. The issue may be that traffic is variable and can be long. The solution may be that he sets his alarm earlier to account for those variabilities. Another step may be that he has to sleep earlier so as to get enough rest in order to wake up earlier. And a follow-up may be scheduled after a few weeks. After the session, the counselor is ready for the next client.

Coaching requires more involvement. The coach needs to understand the person more rather than just getting the person to understand himself. After building a shared ground of knowing what the person's weaknesses and strengths are, the coach can design a program to help the person mitigate the weaknesses and utilize the strengths for advantage. The coach by definition, not only works on the individual, but also on the team. He looks at how to maximize individual contributions and interactions to maximize the team's results.

Mentoring requires the most involvement. Counseling may be short term, coaching may be medium term or for the life of the coach's involvement with the team, mentoring is long term and the mentor may not even be involved at all with the person. It is a commitment between mentor and mentee. A mentor offers both counseling and coaching to develop a person that may not even be considered as part of his team. There's no "payback" for the mentor in as much as mentoring isn't part of his official duties nor would he get anything in return for the development of a mentee. This relationship allows for full honesty on both sides as there is nothing to be gained by the mentor.

Mentors also expend their political resources / connections to help introduce or connect a mentee to others. Mentors will seek to champion their mentees.

Here are my thoughts from a professional services firm prespective.

Counseling - a formal process. Someone is assigned to be your Counselor, yes you can change over the course of your career, especially when you are promoted. They are assigned with the tasks of your formal feed back review, raise discussions and yes dealing with under-preforming people. This is part of the job of being a counselor.

Coaching more of on the job/task training/directions. Here the coach either as a group or one on one sets their expectations and how something should be accomplished. During the task at hand if the coach seeing potential or real problems with what is happening again calls the group or one on one to reset and course correct.

Mentoring - There can be many types of mentoring relationships. Yes they can be formal, but most are of a more informal nature. This is someone who takes interest in you, wants you to succeed and is willing to help you achieve it. Whether it is listening, giving advice and wisdom or helping to open a door they are there. Mentors come and go over time, but are usually around for a much longer time than a coach or counselor.

The interesting dynamic is when a person can take on multiples of these roles. AKA being your coach and mentor. or counselor and coach. Even all three.

PM if you would like to discuss further. Congrats on the promotion and best of luck.

This is very interesting and exactly the sort of discussion I hoped to see.

The big thing I am seeing is a pattern of counseling... in our work climate when the word “counsel” it is nearly exclusively meant in a corrective fashion, maybe disciplinary in nature of maybe not. For instance, we have an official form called a “Counseling Memo”. It is a memo that a line-level supervisor, or above, can issue to a subordinate when they violate policy. It essentially states:

1) you did this thing
2) this thing violates this policy (followed by policy quote)
3) don’t do it again.

By definition a counseling memo is not discipline but considered training. On the other hand, I can elect to “verbally counsel” an employee should I determine they’ve violated policy. Its essentially the same thing... ensuring that the employee understands the expectation they failed to meet and often an admonishment that further failures in this area will be met with a more official response.

Coaching as “task based” makes sense while mentoring seems to be more “developing the person”. If I coach someone I’m helping train their ability to accomplish tangible goals while if I am mentoring someone I am developing the person directly... I want that person to think and reason for themselves.

?

Interesting question, and interesting answers obviously based on many varied life experiences.

In the military where I did most of all that, “counseling” was a form of corrective or even disciplinary action. It could be very low level with usually no long term consequences, “Private, you need a haircut,” but if it were a formal matter it usually involved a letter that ended up in someone’s personnel file and was relatively serious. Counseling was always understood to result from some deficiency in someone’s performance or conduct.

I have always understood “coaching” to be “how to” guidance about specifics. “Stop saying ‘Um’ so much,” “Focus on your front sight,” “You’re only 15 yards from the target, so you must aim high to adjust for the sight/barrel offset,” “Keep your head down,” etc.

“Mentoring” usually seems to be a deeper involvement in someone’s life, or at least career. It’s not just guidance on specifics like, “Mingle more at the office parties,” but the old expression of taking someone under one’s wing. The New York Police Department has/had the expression “rabbi” that referred to an older, more senior officer who not only gave an officer advice and guidance, but who would also intervene in certain ways: “Hey, give Jones a break; he’s a good kid who just needs to learn a little more.” Ironically, however, just as people are being encouraged to mentor newer/younger members of organizations, certain trends are making that less likely.

I read a letter in The Wall Street Journal recently from a woman who was giving acerbic advice about how to avoid sexual harassment claims: Don’t have dinner alone with a woman co-worker/subordinate; don’t ask to meet privately in your office; never say anything that could be interpreted as a personal comment, etc. And then, however, she said (paraphrasing), “Don’t be doing those things, mentor young women.” I about fell over because based on my understanding of mentor it includes frank, open discussions in personal settings when it’s possible for both parties to let their hair down. It was almost as if the woman who wrote the letter considered a mentor to be someone who just ran interference for her and worked to promote her interests all the time.

quote:

Originally posted by thumperfbc:
The big thing I am seeing is a pattern of counseling... in our work climate when the word “counsel” it is nearly exclusively meant in a corrective fashion, maybe disciplinary in nature of maybe not. For instance, we have an official form called a “Counseling Memo”. It is a memo that a line-level supervisor, or above, can issue to a subordinate when they violate policy.

That is a corruption of the meaning of the word. Counseling is supposed to be positive and empowering.

Your "work climate" has perverted it to avoid using the more appropriate term Correction.

It almost makes me wonder if the task assigned to you is to determine if you know the distinction...especially since it is being combined with the other two terms. If you are Goal oriented or Process oriented

Mentoring - experienced person directs inexperienced person
Coaching- person directs individual to behavior that is culture approved.
Counseling- person guides individual to conform to culture.

The responses remind me of this: (not so much the all wrong part)

Blind Men and the Elephant – A Poem by John Godfrey Saxe
Here is John Godfrey Saxe’s (1816-1887) version of Blind Men and the Elephant:

It was six men of Indostan,
To learning much inclined,
Who went to see the Elephant
(Though all of them were blind),
That each by observation
Might satisfy his mind.

The First approach'd the Elephant,
And happening to fall
Against his broad and sturdy side,
At once began to bawl:
"God bless me! but the Elephant
Is very like a wall!"

The Second, feeling of the tusk,
Cried, -"Ho! what have we here
So very round and smooth and sharp?
To me 'tis mighty clear,
This wonder of an Elephant
Is very like a spear!"

The Third approach'd the animal,
And happening to take
The squirming trunk within his hands,
Thus boldly up and spake:
"I see," -quoth he- "the Elephant
Is very like a snake!"

The Fourth reached out an eager hand,
And felt about the knee:
"What most this wondrous beast is like
Is mighty plain," -quoth he,-
"'Tis clear enough the Elephant
Is very like a tree!"

The Fifth, who chanced to touch the ear,
Said- "E'en the blindest man
Can tell what this resembles most;
Deny the fact who can,
This marvel of an Elephant
Is very like a fan!"

The Sixth no sooner had begun
About the beast to grope,
Then, seizing on the swinging tail
That fell within his scope,
"I see," -quoth he,- "the Elephant
Is very like a rope!"
And so these men of Indostan
Disputed loud and long,
Each in his own opinion
Exceeding stiff and strong,
Though each was partly in the right,
And all were in the wrong!

quote:

Originally posted by 9mmepiphany:

quote:

Originally posted by thumperfbc:
The big thing I am seeing is a pattern of counseling... in our work climate when the word “counsel” it is nearly exclusively meant in a corrective fashion, maybe disciplinary in nature of maybe not. For instance, we have an official form called a “Counseling Memo”. It is a memo that a line-level supervisor, or above, can issue to a subordinate when they violate policy.

That is a corruption of the meaning of the word. Counseling is supposed to be positive and empowering.

Your "work climate" has perverted it to avoid using the more appropriate term Correction.

It almost makes me wonder if the task assigned to you is to determine if you know the distinction...especially since it is being combined with the other two terms. If you are Goal oriented or Process oriented

Perhaps it is my own bias that is perverting it... It is just when I hear "counsel" in a work setting it is always caused by a deficiency that has occurred. I am trying to come up with a scenario where I would "counsel" someone in a positive way here at work... I get that counseling out in most of the world has a certain agreed upon meaning. I guess it was lost somewhere in the translation here.

Let me roll this by the collective and see if you think this is counseling... remember, I am a supervisor and I work in a jail.

One of my staff members came by the office yesterday to talk about a situation in the area he was assigned to. The situation was essentially that some inmates chose to violate some specific rules (regarding passing of illegal substances) after this staff member stepped out of the area to take a break (he was relieved by another staff member). The inmates happened to be caught this time.

Now, I know this had occurred because I have been paying attention because I've seen a similar pattern with this staff member when he works these types of assignments. The other day an assault occured when this specific staff member stepped out for a break. There has been 2 other similar type instances in the past month.

So I mentioned it all to this staff member as he is fairly new. He hadn't really noticed the pattern so I asked him "what do you think it means? Is it random?"

He thought about it for a while but he wasn't quite able to get to a reasonable answer to why the inmates were behaving this way. They certainly aren't physically scared of him.

The answer is simple... "They respect you." I explained that when they wait to violate rules like this until he leaves it is a sign of respect and it means he is doing the job well and that he is seen as fair and consistent and professional. I explained to this him and added that the observations the inmates have made, as referenced by their actions, match what I have seen of his performance, and I praised him for that and emplored him to keep up the good work.

Would that be an example of counseling, coaching, or mentoring, in your opinion?

Maybe none of the above? Just an acknowledgement or recognition. If anything, maybe a subset of coaching.