Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

DONALD TRUMP: I’ve been told by my many sources, good sources – they’re very good sources – that the chicken crossed the road. All the Fake News wants to do is write nasty things about the road, but it’s a really good road. It’s a beautiful road. Everyone knows how beautiful it is.

JOE BIDEN: Why did the chicken do the... the... thing in the... you know the rest.

BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period.

AOC: Chickens should not be forced to lay eggs! This is because of corporate greed! Eggs should be able to lay themselves.

HILLARY CLINTON: What difference at this point does it make why the chicken crossed the road.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where’s my gun?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken’s intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white?

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won’t realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is
help him realize how stupid he is acting by not taking on his current problems before adding any new problems.

ANDERSON COOPER: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he’s guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I’ve not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

CAITLYN: The Chicken in on the road to becoming a rooster!

STALIN: The proletarian chicken is on the road to "donate" all her eggs which now belong to the state.

HUEY LONG: When I'm elected Governor the chicken won't be crossing the road there will be a chicken in every pot.

BOOMHAUER: That da gum ole chicken he I tell you what in the middle of the damn.. if I tried to avoid him but chicken bein chicken man it just I think hell be fine walk it off

NEO: There is no chicken.

JKF: Ask not why the chicken crossed the road, ask what you can do for the chicken.

FDR: The day that the chicken crossed the road is a date that will live in infamy.

WINSTON CHURCHILL: You can not reason with the chicken after he has crossed the road.

NEVILLE CHAMBERLAIN: Just let the chicken cross this road, and he will be happy and not need to cross any more roads.

Boy, I say boy, that road reminds me of a gal I once knew. No curves.
Foghorn Leghorn

TRUMP (v2): I’ll tell you: Mexico is sending us some bad pollos to cross the road. I’ll build a fence and make them pay for the wire mesh.

TRUDEAU: Eh, amm, uh, the chicken crossing the road is erm… is what really makes this country great. Aviary diversity is our strength.

MERKEL: Admitting a large number of chicken into our country will not imperil the local poultry. Germany must welcome with open wings whichever birds want to cross the Mediterranean and several other developed countries to reach our welfare state.

PUTIN: The chicken crossed the road? (Smirks) Well, the arms of the FSB are long, and can reach dissident chicken wherever they are.

DOUGLAS MACARTHUR: Old chickens don't cross the road, they just fade away...

FDR: When the chicken reaches the other side of the road, hang on!

ELANOR ROOSEVELT: The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of chickens.

RALPH WALDO EMERSON: Do not cross the road where it leads, cross the road where there are no chickens.

NELSON MANDELA: The greatest glory lies in not never crossing, but crossing after every time the chicken falls.

THOMAS EDISON: Many of life's failures are chickens who did not realize how close they were to the other side of the road.

ABRAHAM LINCOLN: In the end, it is not the number of chickens in the road that count, but the other side with the chickens.

DALE EARNHARDT: Its the road! Chickens ain't supposed to cross the damn thing!

BABE RUTH: Never let the fear of the other side prevent the chicken from crossing the road.

TAGGART: Does any of you chickens have a dime? Somebody's got to go back to town and get a shitload of dimes!

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Only a road crossed is worthwhile with other chickens.

MAE WEST: The chicken only crossed the road once, but it was done right, once is enough.

THOMAS D'ALESANDRO III: It is ten 'o clock. Do you know where your chickens are?

HENRY DAVID THOREAU: Chicken! Go confidently in the direction across the road!

CONFUCIUS: Crossing the road is simple, but the chicken makes it complicated.

MARTHA STEWART: Buy my roasting pan, and the chicken will taste better on the other side of the road.

ROBERT FROST: In three words I can sum up everything I have learned about chickens: cross the road.

CHARLES DICKENS: The road is made ever so many crossings of chickens crossing together.

RAY BRADBURY: The chickens are trying things to see if the road can be crossed.

STEVE JOBS: If the chicken looks hard enough, he will see that the road crossing had many lanes.

ESTEE LAUDER: The chicken never dreamed of the other side of the road. It just crosses it.

COLIN POWELL: There are no secrets to the road crossing, It is the result of the chicken being prepared to cross and learning from its failure.

WAYNE GRETZKY: The chicken doesn't cross 100% of the roads it never tries.

COL. NATHAN JESSEP: Chicken, you want to cross the road!?! You can't handle crossing the road!!!

AYN RAND: The question isn't who isn't going to let the chicken cross the road, but who can stop it from crossing.

SOCRATES: An uncrossed road is not worth walking.

GEORGE ADDAIR: Everything the chicken wanted is on the other side of the road.

AEROSMITH: Cross this way!

RHETT BUTLER: Quite frankly my dear, I don't give a cluck.

NANCY PELOSI: The chicken has to cross the road before, umm, it can umm... find out whats on the other side.