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a smile for every mile: Burma Shave

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July 04, 2020, 10:07 AM
az4783054
a smile for every mile: Burma Shave
From a friend a little older than me, but I remember these well. No, there's nothing wrong with the sentence structure.

I'm sure that Burma Shave actually saved some lives. People laughed and they were more careful! It was a REAL "service" to America, even though it was an advertisement and it was one of the RARE "really useful" ones! They're part of our history of the 1930s and 1940.

Before there were interstates when everyone drove the old 2 lane roads Burma Shave signs would be posted all over the countryside in farmers' fields. They were small red signs with white letters. Five signs, about 100 feet apart, each containing 1 line of a 4 line couplet and the obligatory 5th sign advertising Burma Shave, a popular shaving cream.


A man, a miss,

A car, a curve.

He kissed the miss,

And missed the curve.

Burma Shave


DON'T STICK YOUR ELBOW

OUT SO FAR

IT MAY GO HOME

IN ANOTHER CAR.

Burma Shave



TRAINS DON'T WANDER

ALL OVER THE MAP

'CAUSE NOBODY SITS

IN THE ENGINEER'S LAP.

Burma Shave



SHE KISSED THE HAIRBRUSH

BY MISTAKE

SHE THOUGHT IT WAS

HER HUSBAND JAKE.

Burma Shave



DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD

TO GAIN A MINUTE

YOU NEED YOUR HEAD

YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT.

Burma Shave



DROVE TOO LONG

DRIVER SNOOZING

WHAT HAPPENED NEXT

IS NOT AMUSING.

Burma Shave



BROTHER SPEEDER

LET'S REHEARSE

ALL TOGETHER

GOOD MORNING, NURSE

Burma Shave



CAUTIOUS RIDER

TO HER RECKLESS DEAR

LET'S HAVE LESS BULL

AND A LITTLE MORE STEER.

Burma Shave



SPEED WAS HIGH

WEATHER WAS NOT

TIRES WERE THIN

X MARKS THE SPOT.

Burma Shave



THE MIDNIGHT RIDE

OF PAUL FOR BEER

LED TO A WARMER

HEMISPHERE.

Burma Shave



AROUND THE CURVE

LICKETY-SPLIT

BEAUTIFUL CAR

WASN'T IT?

Burma Shave



NO MATTER THE PRICE

NO MATTER HOW NEW

THE BEST SAFETY DEVICE

IN THE CAR IS YOU.

Burma Shave



A GUY WHO DRIVES

A CAR WIDE OPEN

IS NOT THINKIN'

HE'S JUST HOPING

Burma Shave



AT INTERSECTIONS

LOOK EACH WAY

A HARP SOUNDS NICE

BUT IT'S HARD TO PLAY.

Burma Shave



BOTH HANDS ON THE WHEEL

EYES ON THE ROAD

THAT'S THE SKILLFUL

DRIVER'S CODE.

Burma Shave



THE ONE WHO DRIVES

WHEN HE'S BEEN DRINKING

DEPENDS ON YOU

TO DO HIS THINKING.

Burma Shave



CAR IN DITCH

DRIVER IN TREE

THE MOON WAS FULL

AND SO WAS HE.

Burma Shave



PASSING SCHOOL ZONE

TAKE IT SLOW

LET OUR LITTLE

SHAVERS GROW.

Burma Shave


Do these bring back any old memories? If not, you're merely a child.
July 04, 2020, 10:16 AM
olfuzzy
I'm an old fart so I remember them well Smile
July 04, 2020, 10:23 AM
az4783054
It may be where Bendable learned to write in the sentence structure he uses. Big Grin
July 04, 2020, 10:30 AM
jhe888
I remember seeing them, but they were old ones, in disrepair.




The fish is mute, expressionless. The fish doesn't think because the fish knows everything.
July 04, 2020, 10:36 AM
captain127
Out here in Arizona along a couple of the old highways ( old Route 66 perhaps?) I have seen them still up in good shape.
July 04, 2020, 11:09 AM
Pipe Smoker
I loved the Burma Shave signs. My favorite:

Twinkle twinkle
One-eyed car
How I wonder
Where you are



Serious about crackers
July 04, 2020, 11:15 AM
Wasabibill
If you still
Know where you are
You can't have driven
Very Far


____

I'm filled with gratitude for the blessings I've received.
July 04, 2020, 12:00 PM
whanson_wi
I have a little paperback called "Verse by the Side of the Road" that tells the whole story of the sign and the cream. It lists all the known verses.

It's still in print, and still available.


===
I would like to apologize to anyone I have *not* offended. Please be patient. I will get to you shortly.
July 04, 2020, 12:04 PM
fpuhan
As a kid, my dad drove the family across the country. Twice. My sisters and I were perpetually scanning for the Burma Shave signs.




You can't truly call yourself "peaceful" unless you are capable of great violence. If you're not capable of great violence, you're not peaceful, you're harmless.

NRA Benefactor/Patriot Member
July 04, 2020, 02:05 PM
GT-40DOC
I remember them very well. We used to read them out loud during a car trip.
July 04, 2020, 02:29 PM
V-Tail
Yeah, one of the highlights of our car trips when I was a kid.



הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
July 04, 2020, 04:00 PM
flashguy
I have fond memories of those signs. My family drove from Michigan to Arkansas almost every summer to visit my kinfolk, back in the 1940s and 50s. Those signs were everywhere (no Interstates yet, and very few superhighways).

WITHIN THIS VALE
OF TOIL AND SIN
YOUR HEAD GROWS BALD
BUT NOT YOUR CHIN

yOU CAN DRIVE
A MILE A MINUTE
BUT THERE IS NO
FUTURE IN IT

HE SAW THE TRAIN
AND TRIED TO DUCK IT
KICKED FIRST THE GAS
AND THEN THE BUCKET

ANGELS WHO GUARD YOU
WHEN YOU DRIVE
USUALLY
RETIRE AT 65

And here's one especially good here in Texas
PAST SCHOOLHOUSES
TAKE IT SLOW
LET THE LITTLE
SHAVERS GROW

flashguy




Texan by choice, not accident of birth
July 04, 2020, 04:23 PM
Vanwall
quote:



NO MATTER THE PRICE

NO MATTER HOW NEW

THE BEST SAFETY DEVICE

IN THE CAR IS YOU.

Burma Shave




This one definitely applies on today’s cars
July 04, 2020, 08:07 PM
GMan69
THIRTY DAYS
HATH SEPTEMBER
APRIL, JUNE,
AND THE SPEED OFFENDER.

Burma Shave
July 05, 2020, 07:25 AM
OldMick
I would drive on Route 66 traveling from the Chicagoland area to Bloomington Normal in the ‘60s.

I think thats where I recall seeing the Burma Shave signs, but it could have been when I was much younger, on cross country trips with my grandparents.

Nice memory.
July 05, 2020, 09:57 AM
bobandmikako
My shave mug for many years. I retired from the military and shaving a couple of years ago but I hung on to the mug, just in case.





十人十色
July 05, 2020, 06:51 PM
cjevans
Good road trip memories.

What was the one about 'old horses read'?
Or something like that ...



We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid." ~ Benjamin Franklin.

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July 06, 2020, 07:28 AM
kramden
I remember those well. Was fun to be on vacation and see new "verses" that you hadn't seen before.
July 06, 2020, 07:55 AM
Pipe Smoker
quote:
Originally posted by bobandmikako:
My shave mug for many years. I retired from the military and shaving a couple of years ago but I hung on to the mug, just in case.


That’s a keeper alright. You could use it as a coffee cup.



Serious about crackers
July 06, 2020, 09:33 AM
M-11
Along side my grandfather's field:

MEN WITH WHISKERS
'NEATH THEIR NOSES
OUGHT TO KISS
LIKE ESKIMOSES
Burma Shave

When the contract ran out he used them to close off feed bins. Sure wish I'd been old enough to know to rescue them.



"Common sense is wisdom with its sleeves rolled up." -Kyle Farnsworth
"Freedom of Speech does not guarantee freedom from consequences." -Mike Rowe
"Democracies aren't overthrown, they're given away." -George Lucas