SIGforum
a smile for every mile: Burma Shave
July 04, 2020, 10:07 AM
az4783054a smile for every mile: Burma Shave
From a friend a little older than me, but I remember these well. No, there's nothing wrong with the sentence structure.
I'm sure that Burma Shave actually saved some lives. People laughed and they were more careful! It was a REAL "service" to America, even though it was an advertisement and it was one of the RARE "really useful" ones! They're part of our history of the 1930s and 1940.
Before there were interstates when everyone drove the old 2 lane roads Burma Shave signs would be posted all over the countryside in farmers' fields. They were small red signs with white letters. Five signs, about 100 feet apart, each containing 1 line of a 4 line couplet and the obligatory 5th sign advertising Burma Shave, a popular shaving cream.
A man, a miss,
A car, a curve.
He kissed the miss,
And missed the curve.
Burma Shave
DON'T STICK YOUR ELBOW
OUT SO FAR
IT MAY GO HOME
IN ANOTHER CAR.
Burma Shave
TRAINS DON'T WANDER
ALL OVER THE MAP
'CAUSE NOBODY SITS
IN THE ENGINEER'S LAP.
Burma Shave
SHE KISSED THE HAIRBRUSH
BY MISTAKE
SHE THOUGHT IT WAS
HER HUSBAND JAKE.
Burma Shave
DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD
TO GAIN A MINUTE
YOU NEED YOUR HEAD
YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT.
Burma Shave
DROVE TOO LONG
DRIVER SNOOZING
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
IS NOT AMUSING.
Burma Shave
BROTHER SPEEDER
LET'S REHEARSE
ALL TOGETHER
GOOD MORNING, NURSE
Burma Shave
CAUTIOUS RIDER
TO HER RECKLESS DEAR
LET'S HAVE LESS BULL
AND A LITTLE MORE STEER.
Burma Shave
SPEED WAS HIGH
WEATHER WAS NOT
TIRES WERE THIN
X MARKS THE SPOT.
Burma Shave
THE MIDNIGHT RIDE
OF PAUL FOR BEER
LED TO A WARMER
HEMISPHERE.
Burma Shave
AROUND THE CURVE
LICKETY-SPLIT
BEAUTIFUL CAR
WASN'T IT?
Burma Shave
NO MATTER THE PRICE
NO MATTER HOW NEW
THE BEST SAFETY DEVICE
IN THE CAR IS YOU.
Burma Shave
A GUY WHO DRIVES
A CAR WIDE OPEN
IS NOT THINKIN'
HE'S JUST HOPING
Burma Shave
AT INTERSECTIONS
LOOK EACH WAY
A HARP SOUNDS NICE
BUT IT'S HARD TO PLAY.
Burma Shave
BOTH HANDS ON THE WHEEL
EYES ON THE ROAD
THAT'S THE SKILLFUL
DRIVER'S CODE.
Burma Shave
THE ONE WHO DRIVES
WHEN HE'S BEEN DRINKING
DEPENDS ON YOU
TO DO HIS THINKING.
Burma Shave
CAR IN DITCH
DRIVER IN TREE
THE MOON WAS FULL
AND SO WAS HE.
Burma Shave
PASSING SCHOOL ZONE
TAKE IT SLOW
LET OUR LITTLE
SHAVERS GROW.
Burma Shave
Do these bring back any old memories? If not, you're merely a child.
July 04, 2020, 10:16 AM
olfuzzyI'm an old fart so I remember them well

July 04, 2020, 10:23 AM
az4783054It may be where Bendable learned to write in the sentence structure he uses.

July 04, 2020, 10:30 AM
jhe888I remember seeing them, but they were old ones, in disrepair.
The fish is mute, expressionless. The fish doesn't think because the fish knows everything. July 04, 2020, 10:36 AM
captain127Out here in Arizona along a couple of the old highways ( old Route 66 perhaps?) I have seen them still up in good shape.
July 04, 2020, 11:09 AM
Pipe SmokerI loved the Burma Shave signs. My favorite:
Twinkle twinkle
One-eyed car
How I wonder
Where you are
Serious about crackers. July 04, 2020, 11:15 AM
WasabibillIf you still
Know where you are
You can't have driven
Very Far
____
I'm filled with gratitude for the blessings I've received.
July 04, 2020, 12:00 PM
whanson_wiI have a little paperback called "Verse by the Side of the Road" that tells the whole story of the sign and the cream. It lists all the known verses.
It's still in print, and still available.
===
I would like to apologize to anyone I have *not* offended. Please be patient. I will get to you shortly.
July 04, 2020, 12:04 PM
fpuhanAs a kid, my dad drove the family across the country. Twice. My sisters and I were perpetually scanning for the Burma Shave signs.
You can't truly call yourself "peaceful" unless you are capable of great violence. If you're not capable of great violence, you're not peaceful, you're harmless.
NRA Benefactor/Patriot Member July 04, 2020, 02:05 PM
GT-40DOCI remember them very well. We used to read them out loud during a car trip.
July 04, 2020, 02:29 PM
V-TailYeah, one of the highlights of our car trips when I was a kid.
הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים July 04, 2020, 04:00 PM
flashguyI have fond memories of those signs. My family drove from Michigan to Arkansas almost every summer to visit my kinfolk, back in the 1940s and 50s. Those signs were everywhere (no Interstates yet, and very few superhighways).
WITHIN THIS VALE
OF TOIL AND SIN
YOUR HEAD GROWS BALD
BUT NOT YOUR CHIN
yOU CAN DRIVE
A MILE A MINUTE
BUT THERE IS NO
FUTURE IN IT
HE SAW THE TRAIN
AND TRIED TO DUCK IT
KICKED FIRST THE GAS
AND THEN THE BUCKET
ANGELS WHO GUARD YOU
WHEN YOU DRIVE
USUALLY
RETIRE AT 65
And here's one especially good here in Texas
PAST SCHOOLHOUSES
TAKE IT SLOW
LET THE LITTLE
SHAVERS GROW
flashguy
Texan by choice, not accident of birth July 04, 2020, 04:23 PM
Vanwallquote:
NO MATTER THE PRICE
NO MATTER HOW NEW
THE BEST SAFETY DEVICE
IN THE CAR IS YOU.
Burma Shave
This one definitely applies on today’s cars
July 04, 2020, 08:07 PM
GMan69THIRTY DAYS
HATH SEPTEMBER
APRIL, JUNE,
AND THE SPEED OFFENDER.
Burma Shave
July 05, 2020, 07:25 AM
OldMickI would drive on Route 66 traveling from the Chicagoland area to Bloomington Normal in the ‘60s.
I think thats where I recall seeing the Burma Shave signs, but it could have been when I was much younger, on cross country trips with my grandparents.
Nice memory.
July 05, 2020, 09:57 AM
bobandmikakoMy shave mug for many years. I retired from the military and shaving a couple of years ago but I hung on to the mug, just in case.
十人十色 July 05, 2020, 06:51 PM
cjevansGood road trip memories.
What was the one about 'old horses read'?
Or something like that ...
We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid." ~ Benjamin Franklin.
"If anyone in this country doesn't minimise their tax, they want their head read, because as a government, you are not spending it that well, that we should be donating extra...:
Kerry Packer
SIGForum: the island of reality in an ocean of diarrhoea. July 06, 2020, 07:28 AM
kramdenI remember those well. Was fun to be on vacation and see new "verses" that you hadn't seen before.
July 06, 2020, 07:55 AM
Pipe Smokerquote:
Originally posted by bobandmikako:
My shave mug for many years. I retired from the military and shaving a couple of years ago but I hung on to the mug, just in case.
That’s a keeper alright. You could use it as a coffee cup.
Serious about crackers. July 06, 2020, 09:33 AM
M-11Along side my grandfather's field:
MEN WITH WHISKERS
'NEATH THEIR NOSES
OUGHT TO KISS
LIKE ESKIMOSES
Burma Shave
When the contract ran out he used them to close off feed bins. Sure wish I'd been old enough to know to rescue them.
"Common sense is wisdom with its sleeves rolled up." -Kyle Farnsworth
"Freedom of Speech does not guarantee freedom from consequences." -Mike Rowe
"Democracies aren't overthrown, they're given away." -George Lucas