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Ammoholic |
Today at work I had a boss several levels above me ask me to do something that 1) was against company policy, 2) was not really possible to actually do, and 3) ended up with me not doing my normal job; eating lunch 45 minutes before normal quitting time; and working 12hr day. Sorry the details are slim, but it's the nature of my work. Please share your ridiculous requests from management and impossible tasks. Especially one's where it blew up in the boss's face. Jesse Sic Semper Tyrannis | ||
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Member |
Sell more - sell more - sell more - sell more. That was the demands of my boss at Wells Fargo. We all know how that worked out. By the way, I quit. I'm sorry if I hurt you feelings when I called you stupid - I thought you already knew - Unknown ................................... When you have no future, you live in the past. " Sycamore Row" by John Grisham | |||
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Oriental Redneck |
So, did you do it? Q | |||
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Political Cynic |
I had a boss passing off my technical reports as his own. When a senior VP found out, he had me prepare a bogus report and submit it to my boss. When he couldn’t explain it, he was fired. Most recent job - trying to train ‘engineers’ with the mental agility of a lab rat. | |||
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Ammoholic |
I said it was against company policy, there is no further information I can provide beyond that. It was both against company policy and ridiculous, I'm not even sure why you'd ask that question. Jesse Sic Semper Tyrannis | |||
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Drill Here, Drill Now |
It was like this Dilbert cartoon: I was managing a portion of an oil & gas megaproject (i.e. I had peers with large scopes and there were 2 layers above us that spent 100% of their time on this megaproject). One of the other scopes on the project royally fucked up. I can't share the dollar figure to recover from their mistake but it was staggering. There were 3 options to recover from this mistake, and the only option that affected me was a portion of my project which was future expansion (i.e. we only designed far enough to include in master permit application and procured nothing). Senior management spent 12 months making the decision, and of course 8 hours before I was supposed to leave for a Hawaiian vacation they announce that they chose the option affecting my scope. That left 6 weeks for my team & I to finish design and procure a very expensive, highly technical oil & gas piece of equipment than only 1 company on the other side of world made. Once the purchase order was signed, it'd take 15 months to fabricate and deliver. My team & I developed a plan that afternoon, my team started implementing the plan while I was in Hawaii, I worked like a dog for 5 weeks to finish design and procurement, and took delivery of it on time and on budget. EDIT: Found the Dilbert CartoonThis message has been edited. Last edited by: tatortodd, Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer. | |||
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His Royal Hiney |
My ridiculous work request: Someone requested an analysis report from my boss. She could have done it herself. She sat on it a week until Friday afternoon as I was getting ready to leave. She hands me the request and said it was needed first thing Monday morning. "It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly. Our answer must consist not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual." Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning, 1946. | |||
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Back, and to the left |
Are you certain that the boss 'levels above you' wasn't trying to get you fired?This message has been edited. Last edited by: 83v45magna, | |||
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Member |
Ridiculous request, Police operations: Our lobby was almost all glass and it was July. The lobby was hot. As I entered, I was hit with an unbelievable stench. The worst body odor I had ever experienced on a living being. It was emanating from a bizarre looking, very hairy and filthy man who was enjoying an animated conversation with himself. When my Sergeant greeted me, he informed me that I was to transport this smelly specimen "to wherever he needs to go"! I complained bitterly but with no effect. After loading Stinky in the car, I asked him where he needed to go. He said "Cincinnati". A 70 mile trip one way. Off we went! He smelled so awful that people who were in the lane next to me at traffic signals rolled up their windows. I drove him to his destination, came back and took another hour to disinfect the back of the car. When I signed back into service, Dispatch told me to call the Sarge ASAP. Once on the phone, he launched into an apoplectic rant about me being out of service for 3 hours of the shift. I told him I just did what he asked and hauled Stinky to his choice of location. When Sarge heard the destination was Cincy, he said he would write me up for dereliction of duty. Several days later, I was called into the Patrol Captains office to explain my road trip. After hearing the details, The Captain shook hands with me and said "I would have done the same thing" and that my Sergeant was an idiot. Thanks, Cap! End of Earth: 2 Miles Upper Peninsula: 4 Miles | |||
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Dances With Tornados |
"There's no reason for it. It's just company policy." (I used to drop that little bomb all the time around my old boss. No one liked the little prick.) | |||
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and this little pig said: |
When I was a Mfg Manager for a small NH company, I was asked to send products overseas. I gladly did so until the request came to use pallets with no U.S. identification on them. With a couple of simple questions, I determined that the equipment was being sold to hostile countries. I refused to do it and told the CEO that it was illegal. Soon afterwards, I got laid off! | |||
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Prepared for the Worst, Providing the Best |
My boss (chief) is pretty reasonable so I don't typically have issues like that with him. But I also work for the public, and many of them are stupid. We also have some dispatchers who don't have an iota of common sense or have any idea what constitutes a legitimate call for service. Some examples: Broken pipes in the basement of your private residence at 2:00am. Power outages. Bats in your living room. Going to your house to yell at your husband because he's late to pick you up from work and won't answer his phone (because he's trying to fix the water heater). "Welfare checks" on your kids because the judge gave your ex custody and you're not happy about it. Pretty much any civil matter (custody complaint, landlord/Tennant dispute, arguments over joint property during a divorce, etc.). If it hasn't risen to the level of a criminal matter, there's nothing I can do about it...call your lawyer. And the list goes on. If the average taxpayer knew how much of their tax burden went towards dealing with utter stupidity, they'd be appalled. On the other hand, it's probably worth the cost to not have to deal with it themselves. Yooper, your story made me LOL ! I had a similar experience as a rookie, but it was my own fault. We have a local drunk who pretty much always has warrants (typically minor stuff like criminal trespass or Misdemeanor FTA). He's nasty...has been living on the streets for years and at one point had gangrene in his foot to the point that maggots were eating it. Well, like any typical young guy I was out trying to get into something, and I came up on this fella walking out of the grocery store at around 2am. I had dispatch run him and sure enough, he had an active warrant. I had dealt with him plenty of times before, and kind of knew him, so the arrest was pretty straightforward, until the pat down. He had clearly pissed and crapped in his pants multiple times, and he was very rank. Once I got him in my car, I realized I had made a horrible mistake. I've been in houses with week old dead bodies that smelled better than this guy. It was a 10 minute ride to the jail, where by some miracle he was under the 0.25 BAC limit and I didn't have to take him to the hospital for medical clearance...but no matter how much I cleaned it I couldn't get that smell out of my car for weeks (and I even had a cage and a plastic back seat!). That was a good lesson in officer discretion. I learned why most guys wouldn't mess with this guy unless he was causing an actual problem. It just wasn't worth it. He also had a system that kinda worked for everybody...he'd behave himself enough to build up a few minor charges and when it got cold out he'd go turn himself in to winter in the jail. | |||
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Member |
At least once a month: Boss: *hands me some papers* We need displays set up here, here and here with the products listed and I want pictures of the finished project by close of business today. Me: *researches products* Yeah, not gonna happen. We’ve been out of product A for a couple months, that’s why it hasn’t been selling. Product B isn’t carried at this location and Product C is too big to display. Boss: *confused stare* | |||
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Get my pies outta the oven! |
The one that I deal with on a near-weekly basis is the "weekly action report" I have to submit which has turned into a complete dick-measuring contest for the levels above me. It used to be due Friday morning which makes sense as you want to capture everything you did that week. Then over time they kept moving it back a day, then another day, then another day until my "weekly" activity report is now due and I kid you not...Tuesday by noon. So now it's a Tuesday-Tuesday report and not a capture of one workweek which is stupid, but that's what they want. Then the constantly changing demands about how detailed it should be which fluctuates between these: 1. Make it detailed! We need to know everything you worked on! 2. Stop sending too much information, just a summary is fine! 3. You aren't submitting enough, you need to do a better job of capturing what you do! 4. You need to explain all the terminology you are using, break it down and spell out your acronyms and define everything! 5. Why are you sending a novel, just make it concise and to the point! 6. You don't have to tell us every single thing you did this week, just the highlights 7. Why aren't you telling us every single thing you did this week? It drives me crazy | |||
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Member |
I did not succumb to stupid requests from superiors. My response would be, "No Sir(Ma'am), that's a stupid request. Retired as VP after 30 years, so, it must have been effective. ____________ Pace | |||
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Page late and a dollar short |
Many years ago working at a car dealership that owned many divisions including a racing team, a race car build facility and a famous speedway. I was given the assignment to list all the parts to assemble a 77 Chevrolet Laguna body for NASCAR. Awesome, I had done similar projects before. This was late 76, the new models hadn’t been out that long at this time. Being in parts departments we were used to specific item requests so at times we might not know all the models, sub models, trim options, etc. but could find the information in our catalogs if necessary. So I’m about a half hour into this when I realize something’s not right, can’t find the part number for a 77 Laguna front bumper as they were going to need one to make a fiberglass replica of one. If the part was the same for previous years it would have a listing like 75-7 but it only showed 75-6. No 77 part in bumper, grilles, lighting bezels, nothing. Catalog errors happen, so I went to the showroom and grabbed a Chevelle catalog. No Laguna listed for 77! Next stop, parts manager’s office, “Uhhh, the car you want me to build doesn’t exist!” And on the phone my manager goes. About fifteen minutes later I get told “Make that a Monte Carlo now” -------------------------------------—————— ————————--Ignorance is a powerful tool if applied at the right time, even, usually, surpassing knowledge(E.J.Potter, A.K.A. The Michigan Madman) | |||
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Just because you can, doesn't mean you should |
I guess because it seems like a valid question and it's not clear why you would post something that could have serious blow back your way on a public forum. Other than that, I guess it's no ones business. ___________________________ Avoid buying ChiCom/CCP products whenever possible. | |||
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Spread the Disease |
Come on! He asked it because it's what EVERYONE was thinking after reading the OP. ________________________________________ -- Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past me I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. -- | |||
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Savor the limelight |
^^^I was wondering as well. If it increased his workday to 12 hours and messed up his lunch; clearly it didn't end at the utterance of "It's against company policy." | |||
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Prepared for the Worst, Providing the Best |
My thoughts as well. Seemed like a reasonable question to me. | |||
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