A joke for a Tuesday Evening

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January 09, 2018, 05:04 PM

OneWheelDrive

A joke for a Tuesday Evening

A man runs into a hospital and yells "Doctor, please help me, I'm shrinking!"

And the Doctor replies "The ER's full, so you'll have to be a little patient."

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Ultron: "You're unbearably naive."
Vision: "Well, I was born yesterday."

The Second Amendment to the United States Constitution.

A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.

As ratified by the States and authenticated by Thomas Jefferson, Secretary of State

NRA Life Member

Pronoun: His Royal Highness and benevolent Majesty of all he surveys

343 - Never Forget

Its better to be Pavlov's dog than Schrodinger's cat

There are three types of mistakes; Those you learn from, those you suffer from, and those you don't survive.

"It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly. Our answer must consist not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual." Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning, 1946.

January 09, 2018, 10:04 PM

Hawgster

Ouch!!

So I says to my horse.
"Why the long face"?

Or

The pony calls in sick for work.
He's says.
"I won't be in today because I'm a little horse."

"Shoot lower, Sheriff, They're ridin' shetlands"
May I assume you're not here to inquire about the alcohol or the tobacco?