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Drill Here, Drill Now |
A plane is on its way to Toronto when a blonde in economy class gets up and moves to the first class section and sits down. The flight attendant watches her do this then asks to see her ticket. She then tells the blonde that she paid for economy class and will have to sit in the back. The blonde replies, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going Toronto, and I’m sitting right here.” The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells both the pilot and copilot there’s a blonde bimbo sitting in first class that belongs in economy and won’t move back to her seat. The copilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain because she only paid for economy that she has to return to her seat. The blonde replies, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going Toronto, and I’m sitting right here.” The copilot tells the pilot that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to arrest the blonde who won’t listen to reason. The pilot says, “You say she is a blonde? I’ll handle this. I’m married to a blonde. I speak blonde.” He goes to the back to the blonde whispers in her ear. The blonde says, “oh, I’m sorry.” She gets up and returned back to her seat in economy. The flight attendant and copilot are amazed and ask the pilot what he said to make her move without any fuss. “I told her that first class is not going to Toronto.“ Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer. | ||
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Perfect!!  | |||
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Nullus Anxietas |
 Coincidentally: My wife just texted me that one earlier this morning. "America is at that awkward stage. It's too late to work within the system,,,, but too early to shoot the bastards." -- Claire Wolfe "If we let things terrify us, life will not be worth living." -- Seneca the Younger, Roman Stoic philosopher | |||
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| Dances With Tornados |
There is no such thing as dumb blonde jokes. They're all true stories!!! . | |||
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My wife would not be amused.  _________________________________________________________________________ “A man’s treatment of a dog is no indication of the man’s nature, but his treatment of a cat is. It is the crucial test. None but the humane treat a cat well.” -- Mark Twain, 1902 | |||
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| Drill Here, Drill Now |
Have you tried explaining it to her s - l - o - w - l - y ? Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer. | |||
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| A man's got to know his limitations  |
Ha! Good one "But, as luck would have it, he stood up. He caught that chunk of lead." Gunnery Sergeant Carlos Hathcock "If there's one thing this last week has taught me, it's better to have a gun and not need it than to need a gun and not have it." Clarence Worley | |||
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| Member |
Three women are standing in an elevator, a red head, a brunette and a blond. The red head notices a (blank) stain on the wall. She looks at it and says it looks like a (blank) stain. The brunette sniffs it and says it smells like (blank) stain. The blonde licks it and says it’s no body from this building. You fill in the blank. I don’t want to get banned. | |||
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The Unmanned Writer |
There’s a double dawg dare ya somewhere in there. Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. "If dogs don't go to Heaven, I want to go where they go" Will Rogers The definition of the words we used, carry a meaning of their own... | |||
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| and this little pig said: |
My wife (blonde) has 3 Bachelor degrees. While I have a Master's, I can't put anything over on her! YMMV | |||
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| It's not easy being me |
While I love the story, I will never tell it to my wife, either. She's blonde, we've been married almost 37 years, have worked together for the last 36, and she (thinks she) is smarter than me. She did graduate from Vanderbilt (I "only" graduated from Auburn...War Eagle!!). I told her a blonde joke ONE TIME 30++ years ago, and realized that was a huge mistake!! _______________________________________ Flammable, Inflammable, or Nonflammable....... Hell, either it Flams or it doesn't!! (George Carlin) | |||
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| I have not yet begun to procrastinate |
LOL She didn’t get it? j/k Worst Christmas present I ever bought was for my wife’s (then girlfriend) roommate. She was the kind of blonde the jokes are all about. It was a Farside calendar. She didn’t understand *any* of them! -------- After the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box. | |||
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Is your wife a Delta Delta Delta sorority member also? ------- Trying to simplify my life... | |||
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