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Two Alligators

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September 12, 2018, 01:11 PM
95flhr
Two Alligators
Two alligators were sitting at the side of the swamp near the lake. The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, "I can't understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age; we were the same size as kids. I just don't get it."

"Well," said the big gator, "what have you been eating?"

"Politicians, same as you," replied the small gator.

"Hmm.....Well, where do you catch them?"

"Down the other side of the swamp near the parking lot by the Capitol."

"Same here. Hmm.... How do you catch them?"

"Well, I crawl up under one of their Lexus cars and wait for one to unlock the car door. Then I jump out, grab them by the leg, shake the shit out of them and eat 'em!"

"Same here." says the big gator. "Do you eat Democrats or Republicans?"

"I eat the Democrats" says the little guy.

"Ah!" says the big gator. "I think I see your problem. You're not getting any real nourishment. You see, by the time you finish shaking the shit out of a Democrat, there's nothing left but an asshole and a briefcase.”




“Government exists to protect us from each other. Where government has gone beyond its limits is in deciding to protect us from ourselves.”
― Ronald Reagan

Retired old fart
September 12, 2018, 01:16 PM
Sailor1911
Sent that to my B-I-L in Chicago, a dyed in the wool commie! That should get a rise out of him!




Place your clothes and weapons where you can find them in the dark.

“If in winning a race, you lose the respect of your fellow competitors, then you have won nothing” - Paul Elvstrom "The Great Dane" 1928 - 2016
September 12, 2018, 03:10 PM
jimmy123x
That was a good one!!!!!!!
September 12, 2018, 04:18 PM
arfmel
Shared. Smile
September 12, 2018, 07:20 PM
preten2b
I'm gonna tell it like I stole it...wait... I am stealing it Smile


------------------
The plural of anecdote is not data. -Frank Kotsonis
September 12, 2018, 07:30 PM
nhtagmember
stolen...love it



[B] Against ALL enemies, foreign and DOMESTIC