"Some things are apparent. Where government moves in, community retreats, civil society disintegrates and our ability to control our own destiny atrophies. The result is: families under siege; war in the streets; unapologetic expropriation of property; the precipitous decline of the rule of law; the rapid rise of corruption; the loss of civility and the triumph of deceit. The result is a debased, debauched culture which finds moral depravity entertaining and virtue contemptible." -- Justice Janice Rogers Brown
"The United States government is the largest criminal enterprise on earth." -rduckwor
April 01, 2020, 12:50 PM
h2oys
quote:
Originally posted by Ronin1069:
quote:
Originally posted by Ronin101: how old is she? does she live with you ie have no place of her own?
Yes she is stable.
She's 44 and has her own place; along with her own money and saving to make due.
Then you don't need to wait for the right time. Best to cut the cord as you know it won't work.
April 01, 2020, 01:10 PM
cheesegrits
From this female's perspective, just call and tell her. Be kind and straight forward.
It seems to me that if she's not dependent on you for shelter or upkeep, the biggest downside to telling her now is that there's not a whole lot she can do to get out of the house and take her mind off of it. But that shouldn't keep you from ending something that you know is not going to go anywhere.
Good luck.
April 01, 2020, 01:46 PM
mojojojo
quote:
Originally posted by cheesegrits: From this female's perspective, just call and tell her. Be kind and straight forward.
It seems to me that if she's not dependent on you for shelter or upkeep, the biggest downside to telling her now is that there's not a whole lot she can do to get out of the house and take her mind off of it. But that shouldn't keep you from ending something that you know is not going to go anywhere.
Good luck.
^^^^ THIS
Icarus flew too close to the sun, but at least he flew.
April 01, 2020, 02:58 PM
hudr
quote:
Originally posted by cheesegrits: From this female's perspective, just call and tell her. Be kind and straight forward.
It seems to me that if she's not dependent on you for shelter or upkeep, the biggest downside to telling her now is that there's not a whole lot she can do to get out of the house and take her mind off of it. But that shouldn't keep you from ending something that you know is not going to go anywhere.
Good luck.
Yes, I was in this exact situation a couple years ago. But mine was a long distance relationship (about 4 hours drive time). Come to find out, she was having a lot of the same thoughts. We ended it and we remain friends. After a cooling off period, we are now to the point we can chat from time to time.
April 01, 2020, 03:46 PM
Kraquin
quote:
Originally posted by Ronin1069:
Bottom line, am I the poster-child for "Ass-Hat" if I break up with my out-of-work girlfriend who lives alone, in the middle of a pandemic?
You're 50. If you haven't felt it already you soon will begin to feel your mortality in a more pronounced way which heightens your value of the time you have left. At this point in life the opinions of others concerning your character should be the least of your worries. Regardless, it's not like anyone is going to erect your statue and engrave ASSHAT on it. If they did you'd be dead and wouldn't know it anyway.
April 01, 2020, 03:47 PM
83v45magna
There's been a lot of good advice here, from several perspectives. There is only one thing to do and one overriding reason to do it. You need to end it as gently as is possible. Because time marches on, you don't want to wait. This is the time and this is your chance. This other interest is not the only 'fish' as they say, but you know who and where she is and you know you're interested. That likely will not last forever.
You both deserve to be happy, so get on with it. Good luck. See my tagline below:
I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all. -Ecclesiastes 9:11
...But the king shall rejoice in God; every one that sweareth by Him shall glory, but the mouth of them that speak lies shall be stopped. - Psalm 63:11 [excerpted]
April 01, 2020, 03:53 PM
Ox190
Rip the band aid off.
April 01, 2020, 03:53 PM
KevinCW
Be polite, professional, and honest.
She will be hurt, but in the long run think of it as what would you want her to say to a future girlfriend about you? Would she leave you a good review after some time passes?
If she is a reasonable person, she will recover and hopefully look back at good times favorably. If not, you dodged a bullet.
Strive to live your life so when you wake up in the morning and your feet hit the floor, the devil says "Oh crap, he's up."
April 01, 2020, 05:23 PM
RR
quote:
Originally posted by KevinCW: Be polite, professional, and honest.
She will be hurt, but in the long run think of it as what would you want her to say to a future girlfriend about you? Would she leave you a good review after some time passes?
If she is a reasonable person, she will recover and hopefully look back at good times favorably. If not, you dodged a bullet.
Am I the only one that thought the bolded part was going in a different direction?
April 01, 2020, 05:52 PM
oldbill123
If you are not spending hours daily on the phone together, you may both be realizing that this just is not it. You just found an outside option first
April 01, 2020, 05:56 PM
ffips
Do it in person, face to face. Any other way is less than desired. It allows closure on both sides.
If totally wigged out about exposure, tyvek suit up, add some goggles and a respirator and dive right in.
It ain't always easy to do the right thing, but in the end, it's usually best.
Something like this might help: "Ronan1069's girlfriend, we need to talk and there is no easy way to say this. I care for you but I don't see spending my life with you. We are each have different desires, and I (Ronin1069) feel it is in our best interest to stop seeing each other. I am sorry if this is unpleasant right now. Ultimately it is best for both of us."
I wish you luck.
April 01, 2020, 06:19 PM
bendable
Is it soup yet?
Safety, Situational Awareness and proficiency.
Neck Ties, Hats and ammo brass, Never ,ever touch'em w/o asking first
April 01, 2020, 06:32 PM
1KPerDay
quote:
Originally posted by Ryanp225: Once you made up your mind you are just stringing her along. Have the talk with her asap.
Yep, be honest and get it over with. Like a band-aid. RIGHT OFF!!
--------------------------- My hovercraft is full of eels.
April 01, 2020, 06:43 PM
Ronin101
she seems to be older and independent I would just tell her.
April 01, 2020, 07:29 PM
LS1 GTO
quote:
Originally posted by Ox190: Rip the band aid off.
Dis!!
Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
"If dogs don't go to Heaven, I want to go where they go" Will Rogers
The definition of the words we used, carry a meaning of their own...
April 01, 2020, 07:37 PM
jimmy123x
quote:
Originally posted by Ronin1069:
quote:
Originally posted by Ronin101: how old is she? does she live with you ie have no place of her own?
Yes she is stable.
She's 44 and has her own place; along with her own money and saving to make due.
Just be honest and tell her nicely and not waste her time. Or tell her you don't plan on ever getting married and would like to date other people.
April 01, 2020, 07:45 PM
bald1
A little humor
Play this loudly over and over and over within her earshot! LOL
Certifiable member of the gun toting, septuagenarian, bucket list workin', crazed retiree, bald is beautiful club! USN (RET), COTEP #192
April 01, 2020, 07:57 PM
cparktd
What ever you do, don't do it on April fools day. Just tell her you just want to be friends... that always works
Seriously man, I have no clue but I do wish you and her the best. Just be prepared for possible rejection from the new girl...
Endeavor to persevere.
April 01, 2020, 08:01 PM
Bytes
If you're absolutely sure your feeling aren't brought on by this whole lock down thing then break the news to her that it's over. Post Haste! If you're not sure, think about it for awhile.
