On Saturday one of the stranded astronauts on the International Space Station (ISS) reported a strange noise coming from their Boeing Starliner's speaker system. Mission Control described it as "kind of like a pulsating noise, almost like a sonar ping" for which they haven't yet found an obvious explanation.
The troubled Starliner, suffering from helium leaks and thruster failures, is scheduled to return to earth on autopilot September 6. It was decided too dangerous for the two crewmembers to return with it, and NASA believes they'll have a much better chance returning on a SpaceX vehicle in February 2025.
It's an audio alert that Boeing has remotely activated Starliner's secret self-destruct mode, in an attempt to obliterate all the evidence of their massive failure.
Or perhaps the pulsing beeps correlate to the downward spiral of Boeing's stock value.
Or it's the Starliner's computer attempting to communicate via Morse Code to beg to be put of its misery, rather than being sent back to Earth to be fucked over again by more Boeing diversity hire engineers.
Or maybe it's a warning from the bank that Boeing's accounts are approaching overdraft again and in dire need of another government cash infusion, despite the $5 billion the US government has already paid them for their shoddy spacecraft.
Or aliens cyborgs hacked the speaker system and are laughing at Boeing.
September 01, 2024, 08:28 PM
911Boss
AirTag?
What part of "...Shall not be infringed" don't you understand???
It’s a New Jersey flat bed tow truck driver hooking up the Starliner.
I hope Boeing has AAA!
“There is love in me the likes of which you’ve never seen. There is rage in me the likes of which should never escape." —Mary Shelley, Frankenstein
September 01, 2024, 08:54 PM
kkina
quote:
It's an audio alert that Boeing has remotely activated Starliner's secret self-destruct mode, in an attempt to obliterate all the evidence of their massive failure.
There is an “Alien” stow-away aboard the craft and it has grown large enough for the crew to hear its heart-beat.
__________ "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy."
September 01, 2024, 09:06 PM
wrightd
quote:
Originally posted by RogueJSK: It's an audio alert that Boeing has remotely activated Starliner's secret self-destruct mode, in an attempt to obliterate all the evidence of their massive failure.
Or perhaps the pulsing beeps correlate to the downward spiral of Boeing's stock value.
Or it's the Starliner's computer attempting to communicate via Morse Code to beg to be put of its misery, rather than being sent back to Earth to be fucked over again by more Boeing diversity hire engineers.
Or maybe it's a warning from the bank that Boeing's accounts are approaching overdraft again and in dire need of another government cash infusion, despite the $5 billion the US government has already paid them for their shoddy spacecraft.
Or aliens cyborgs hacked the speaker system and are laughing at Boeing.
Very good. Ha !!
Lover of the US Constitution Wile E. Coyote School of DIY Disaster
So the two stranded astronauts will remain in space until February? An original 8 day mission turns into 7 months? Fucking Boeing. I googled and found this article. Sounds like shit got real heated.
“Remember to get vaccinated or a vaccinated person might get sick from a virus they got vaccinated against because you’re not vaccinated.” - author unknown
September 01, 2024, 10:17 PM
Gustofer
I'm not saying it's aliens, but...
________________________________________________________ "Great danger lies in the notion that we can reason with evil." Doug Patton.
September 01, 2024, 10:44 PM
preten2b
Someone put a load of laundry in late. They do have extra wash to do
------------------ The plural of anecdote is not data. -Frank Kotsonis
