Mom and dad, being the good Catholics they were, thought they'd test the rhythm method one more time....

quote:

Originally posted by mark123:
Read my profile.

quote:

Originally posted by Patriot:
I was born a poor, black child…

Wait, were you reading mine or stating yours?

Fifty five years, still waiting for the start.

First the earth cooled. And then the dinosaurs came, but they got too big and fat, so they all died and they turned into oil. And then the Arabs came and they bought Mercedes Benz's.

Great flick!

quote:

Originally posted by Patriot:
I was born a poor, black child…

Long ago, in a galaxy far away......

Exactly seven years after The Day that will go down in Infamy, a boy was born, who Thank the Lord was not named Pearl.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: bettysnephew,

When a mommy loves a daddy veeerrry much…..

Dear Penthouse Forum, I never thought it would happen to me……

There I was, tied to the bedposts and in she walked, wearing spurs and carrying jumper cables...

“Complete Bull Shit!” He said as the new dad reeled outta the Labor & Delivery smelling of beer and cigarettes. His shipmates, the ones sober enough to trick their way into the hospital, greeted him with a round of cheer and smacks on his back.

It was the last day he served in the Coast Guard. Thankfully she had gone into labor before the new month, and it only cost him $25.00.

It was a long day...

(I was born on June 21)

I'd like to say I was born under a full moon, but I looked it up and it turned out to be a waning gibbous. (No, that's not the tree-swinging ape or the minor Marvel Comics villain/antihero; that's a gibbon.) But I learned a new word, so it's not a total loss.

I was born at a very early age...

Screaming, covered in someone else’s blood.

Once upon a time, in a small Texas town…

"Mama, Papa, the giant gorillas are attacking"! With a slight Castilian accent, the urgent whisper crackling in static on the old radio was followed by a sing-song falsetto, "Have they reached you first?", in a distinctly British accent. He knew that voice, and more ominously, knew what the coded message meant. He blamed this turn of events on being young and stupid. But as the Pope frequently reminded him, he was no longer young.

There was only one path forward from here, only one small chance to save all of humanity. He'd always known that greatness would one day be placed upon him, and now he knew in what form it would be - if he succeeded. If he failed? Let's not even think about that possibility. To truly understand how he ended up here, in the Parabellum Playground, we have to go all the way back to a different era. It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.

December 7th vet Hickam 1945 after Southern Pacific
tour with AAC B-17S. Hooked up with Margaret in Biloxi then to Brooklyn Army Depot Nov 1947 one more US Army brat. That's the beginning, rest is all down hill.

What? There's ANOTHER one???

First thing I recall in life was being circumcised.

It hurt so bad I couldn't walk for a year.