This was the topic at breakfast the other day ,

four couples had kids that have been dealing with all their kids being gone.

two are doing fine,just fine.
the other two , not so much, one couple have separated, the other couple are in counseling .

The grandma's and grandpa's at the breakfast never had a problem , or so they say.

I was the last to leave the nest and Mom ( then widowed) went round and around with me about moving out.

In my waning years, I understand completely, but at 20 , I was oblivious.

anyone here have troubles ? or was it all easy peasey ?

It was AWESOME?

I really missed my daughter for the first month or two when she went to college. After that, my wife and I adapted to a new routine and everything was fine.

I missed them, but texts and FaceTime helped. Now I get nearly daily photos texted about each of my kids kids. Not too hard.

The first couple of months were difficult, he is our only child. Barely slept during that time. But it became much better, now a normal way of life. Plus planning and executing our move from CA became the life saver.

I love it. If only my son would stay out. He's in and out about once every couple of months.

I'm looking forward to mine Will let you know in two years.

We had 6 months as empty nesters. It was weird at first, but Mrs DF and I just focused on getting to know each other again. It was nice. I found my best friend again.

It was outstanding. We had to drive slowly not to pass our last one on the way out of the neighborhood as we embarked on a road trip same day!

We have, admittedly, always gotten along well and had made time for ourselves as important as that for our kids. A few friends we know how have really struggled after this phase starts have been the ones who previously bragged on their kids being the most important thing ever, never having spend a night away from their kids, never taken a trip without them, etc.

Perhaps that model sets folks up to be great parent/friends, but less good a couple after 18-25 years.

Took me a little while to get used to not having someone to blame things on and my wife wanting me to do things with her that used to do with the kids.

We miss them, but it is nice at the same time.

Overall, toilet paper consumption has been cut in half.

Us, fantastic... we are traveling the world and - tell the kids to always knock before entering the house!

Besides, our nest isn't that empty.

3 cats and a dog suffice as surrogates.

Did I mention we're having a great time?

Lifew is good!

Mixed emotions, I'm sure like most. At first we missed having them around all the time terribly.

Now, couple of years later, we think it's great. Fortunately our two kids are local to us so we can see them and our son's growing family regularly.

I like having two fewer adults living in our home.

It is going great! Loved both our boys and they and the grandchildren are always welcome but the wife and I are enjoying our time together!

quote:

Originally posted by bendable:
four couples had kids that have been dealing with all their kids being gone.

two are doing fine,just fine.
the other two , not so much, one couple have separated, the other couple are in counseling .

The grandma's and grandpa's at the breakfast never had a problem , or so they say.

It is likely they are being truthful because they are like the first two couples.

The second two couples likely were having problems before the kids left and focused on the kids as a distraction from their issues.

Having your kids leave is like an alcoholic giving up drinking. You have to face the underlying issues/feelings that you've been avoiding

My parents, particularly my mom had a rough time. I'm the youngest of 3 boys.

I see them every week and they don't live very far away, so it's easier on them now.

I was married 36 years before wife passed from cancer. Not all of it was perfect, and raising kids had a great deal to do with demands on personal time. Jump ahead to answer your question, it was one of the best periods the wife and I had together. For me, the role of my wife playing mother seemed to diametrically oppose whether she had the time to just be wifey.

I have seen others split when it was one of the only things that a couple was staying together for.

We (i.e. my wife, and I through her complaints) worried a lot, and had to help support, two of our kids after they left home. Not their fault, illnesses that affected their ability to work. It all got WAY better after they married. The middle child, a son, is a boomerang kid, still dealing with that. When we were living away from the kids in Maui, my wife and I got along just great--"out of sight, out of mind"--but then--boomerang!

It was sad when the youngest moved out, but he had been at College for 4 years.
We just make sure we have a lot of contact with the kids and now with their kids. It is the natural progression of life, so we dealt with it like all things. It was harder than some, but a lot easier than most to deal with.
The wife and I get along better than ever.