"Is that how you wanted your hair cut?"

quote:

Originally posted by LS1 GTO:
I'll start;

Never EVER ask a woman if she's pregnant.

You just need to be wrong once to understand why.

Yeah, just once of asking "how far are you along?" to a fat woman and you will be cured of that.

I did it once ^^^^^, never again!!

Who's the daddy?

If she asks, "Does this dress make me look fat?"

You should never, NEVER, reply, "It's not the dress, dear."

Are you serious? Yeah, its a bad idea to suggest whatever she just said wasn't a serious thing.

I wonder how is your sister in bed?

These are certain no-no's:

"Just calm down."

"Wow, your mother has done a number on you."

"I'm not mad at you anymore."

"You say I can do whatever I want? I will because you said I can."

"I'm surprised you haven't been shot by other motorists on the freeway."

"What are those things on the side of your head for because they certainly aren't for listening."

What the hell is your problem tonight?

You're acting crazy!

'Was it good for you?' or 'Am I the best you've had?'

When she asks if another woman is attractive NEVER answer yes. Better to say, she is okay but you are better for me.

quote:

Originally posted by armedprof:
When she asks if another woman is attractive NEVER answer yes. Better to say, she is okay but you are better for me.

Actually, a safe answer is "which one?"

quote:

Originally posted by V-Tail:
If she asks, "Does this dress make me look fat?"

You should never, NEVER, reply, "It's not the dress, dear."

A friend of mine (who is highly argumentative) Actually responded 'No, I think the fact that you're fat makes you look fat.'

I still don't believe he actually said it since he was standing there, unmarked, referring to this story in the past tense.

quote:

Originally posted by Flashlightboy:
These are certain no-no's:

<snip>

"What are those things on the side of your head for because they certainly aren't for listening."

Sigh...

When is dinner ready while she's mowing the lawn.

quote:

Originally posted by ulsterman:
Tell a friend they have a nice mustache and she'll never talk to you again.

Tell her she has a hint of a moustache, just like her mother...

I *almost* asked a co-worker if she was pregnant getting onto an elevator with her and another female co-worker. Long ago, late 90s. The OTHER woman asked and got an EARFUL and told NO! I'm on steroids for something... I remember thinking, "I was seconds from asking the same damn thing."

That lesson stuck with me.

"You SURE you wanna eat dessert?"