I am about to have a family history book printed and distributed to a dozen or so people. Hard cover, 120 pages, 400 years of our lines back to the Mayflower. Each bio is from 1 paragraph to 2 pages long, with photos and document scans. Also a few teases back into medieval times.

A bare minimum of family tree, with an emphasis on providing fun info about each person.

On the back cover I'd like to have some fake reviews, the way a lot of real books have reviews.

A few ideas so far:

"Well, it is ... something"
"I've never read anything quite like it before"
"An exciting plot! Complete with mutiny, an illegitimate medieval daughter, and James the dairy farmer."


Thanks for the laughs I know you all will come up with.

That's supposed to be a family tree, looks more like a saguaro cactus.

In reference to the Mayflower crossing. "Apparently their cooking was so bad, the British tossed them out."

"Couldn't put it down!" - A. Kleptomaniac

"A timeless tale rewarding the reader with many well-chosen consonants and vowels." - NY Times Review of Words

Soon to be a Minor Motion Picture!

So that story about a million monkeys is true.

"It has certainly surpassed any of the latest family history books I have read."

This message has been edited. Last edited by: fiasconva, December 14, 2023 03:24 PM

"Once you put it down, you can't pick it up."

A must read book if you absolutely have to read it.

A unique take on the classic tale of a person making an unwise life choice about what book to write. Or read.

I expected more forks.

I absolutely had to buy this book, my professor wrote it.

It’s a compendium of everything you never wanted to know all in one volume.

I’ve been waiting for this book all my life. After picking it up I couldn’t put it down until I got to the end so I turned it over, looked at the back, and set it down. - Oluf Christian Dietrichson

Paraphrasing Mark Twain:
“A fun read, but of a mild sort.”

"I read it, but I still dont care"!

Family tree? From the cover, I expected a story of a telephone pole.

I keep a copy in my bathroom. It's my #2 book.

A real family jewel…..

From sailing the Mayflower to Mayflower Van Lines: This is the way we went!

Nobody reads this stuff and only skims over the pictures... A real page turner!

This book can't be cast aside lightly, it must be thrown with great force!

Now you'll know who's the skeleton in the closet!

Four out of five family members agree that we didn't want to include aunt Edna.

'You coulda made better use o' dis paper!' -Paige Turner.

Satisfaction guaranteed or your family history back.

Absolutely riveting! (Some assembly required, rivets not included)

Worst cruise story ever.

This was a Christmas gift I didn't ask for

And how about "end of quote, repeat the line"

Your family tree is a wreath.

Nice pictures, but it didn’t explain why my mail order DNA test came back as 1/4 Cuban.

- Bret

Why does that branch self pollinate?