I'm not an old guy, 35 years old, but the past year has been full of ups and a lot of downs. Nothing everyone else doesn't deal with, it's just the downside of time passing and getting older.

My Grandfather passed away the summer of 2017. A Navy vet of WW2, spent his days on a destroyer escort and served as a corpsman. He lived a very long and healthy life and died quickly just shy of his 92nd birthday. I was lucky enough to spend a lot of time with him over he last 15 years. When my grandmother died, he moved from south Florida to Orlando, which was nice to have him so close. I learned a lot from him about life, business, and enjoyed his presence. Despite his age, he was sharp as a razor. He was the oldest of 9 and a true patriarch of his siblings. The last year of his life was spent at the Orlando VA and I can't say enough good things about that facility. The VA catches a lot of shit but this facility in Orlando is absolutely top notch. In true colors, he knew it was his time and he was ready to go. He was his typical impatient self right until the end, he didn't want to wait for his body to give up. Never before did I put any thought in to euthanasia, but that's a story for another day. It was interesting to see someone ready to go and at peace with it, but wanting to get a move on. The downside of him living as long as he did was the loss he endured. Two wives, a son, and countless friends and siblings. Again, just the cost of doing business I guess.

My grandfather had 6 children of his own. The oldest, the patriarch of his siblings, died a few months later in December. He was a few weeks shy of his 68th birthday. This one was an unexpected punch in the stomach, a real motherfucker. My uncle was also a Navy vet as well as a role model who taught me many things about life. My uncle left behind a wife, three grown children and 6 grand children. When my parents divorced, my grandfather and my uncle were very supportive of my mother, as any Dad or big Brother would. Dealing with the heartbreak of my mother losing both of them in rapid succession sucked, absolutely gutting. I don't know that theres an age where it becomes any better to lose the people you love, but I'm certainly not there yet. My uncle used to joke that he and I shared a birthday, yet my mother named me after their OTHER brother. He was a good one, he should have had more time. One of the things he taught me was to do the things you want to do NOW, don't wait. He lived his life that way.

A few weeks back, I lost a high school buddy. Good friends through the years of doing stupid shit and being young. One of the smartest kids I knew in high school and college, a true friend that would do anything for you, not a malicious bone in his body. He had his demons and battled addiction on many levels. We went our separate ways about 10 years ago when I told him I couldn't watch him go down the path of destruction any longer. I offered help and support in any way he needed, but he had to be wiling to help himself. He wasn't ready. Over the years, he continued to battle but persevered and got his act together. He got serious about treatment and focused his attention on being clean and his faith. He helped others at his church and offered counseling and tutoring to those in his community. Unfortunately, I never got to see him at his best. He was 34 years old. 34 fucking years old. So much life left to live, so many things left to experience...

If you're lucky to live long enough, you'll experience the death of people you love. That's life, I suppose.

[QUOTE]If you're lucky to live long enough, you'll experience the death of people you love. That's life, I suppose.
/QUOTE]
Count on it.

Death comes for us all.

That doesn't make it easy, but it's the only certain thing in the universe.

As the first two reply's indicate, death reaches out to all of us. However you got to know a great man and he lived a long life and passed some of his wisdom on to you.

Be proud to have known him!

Losing family and friends are indeed part of getting older.
I'm 20 years older than you and I'll add that when all of the generation passes that knew you as a child, a lot of your past is gone too. There's no one to remember the "good ol' days" about you, no one for you to reminisce with.

Losing friends that you've had for 30+ years is the same in as much as you'll not have the time to make the connection you had with them with anyone else. And you won't want to.

The "ups" are the new kids you don't know yet. Grandkids and other children, neices and a nephew for me, are a Godsend. I get to be "the old man" that shoots and fishes with them. AND I'm the guy that let's them have fun, stay up late and not say "NO" as quick as the parents do.

The "Downs" you can't avoid. The "Ups" are things you have to keep your eyes open to find sometimes.

Good luck - you'll do fine.

GGF

Death is life's way of saying, "Time's up!"

I'm not making light of your situation; my mother died early January of last year, my mother in law who had lived with us and being taken care of by my wife died October last year, and my sister died early this year.

Years ago at a funeral, I saw a friend whom I have not seen in a while. The dead was a common acquaintance. He noted that we used to go to each other's birthday parties, graduations, then weddings, then our children's birthdays, then their weddings, then funerals. It's the normal cycle. As we took leave of each other, we both said, "See you at the next funeral."

Speaking of ups and downs, I want to share something I heard today. We go to the mountain tops to celebrate but we can't stay there. The air is thin, it's cold, not much grows. We have to go to the valley where things grow. So when you find yourself in the mountaintop, take advantage and celebrate. And when you're in the valley as most of the time you'll be, find the opportunity to grow.

Yeah, dying is as natural as living.

A few years back I went to my 50th HS reunion. On the wall, in the back, they had an area they called "no longer with us". There must have been 50 names on that wall and our class was not all that large. Some I knew about, most I didn't. I stood there for the longest time just looking at all the names. People I knew for years. Some were close friends at the time, others were not.

I still think about all those names at times.