SIGforum
Dumb things you've heard people say
March 18, 2021, 05:55 PM
PykerDumb things you've heard people say
quote:
The border is secure
March 18, 2021, 06:36 PM
jimmy123xMy grandmother was Irish and had a really bad temper if you set her off. When I was a little kid, my uncle set her off and she yelled at him "Ed, you son of a bitch!" so he paused and replied "But mom, that would make you a bitch" there was total silence in the entire room and her temper went away instantly.....I was around 7 years old and laughing at it......
March 18, 2021, 06:39 PM
dewhorsequote:
Originally posted by 1flynDO:
My personal favorite is at every single funeral someone comments “He/she looks really good.” I used to let it slide now I don’t. I go ask you do know he is deceased? They say yes. Then I ask how good can someone look if they have passed.
Closely followed by "they look so natural"
no they don't! they look like Liberace's make up artist did 10 lines of coke and went to town on Aunt Ethel
March 18, 2021, 08:00 PM
PASigquote:
Originally posted by Scoutmaster:
Some years ago a US gov't auditor, but very British, doing the annual cost incurred audit on our contracts, commented to me "you yanks are bloody ungrateful to us Brits for saving your "backsides" in WWII. You would have lost that war if it weren't for us".
March 18, 2021, 09:29 PM
Sailor1911Bi-partisan support!
Place your clothes and weapons where you can find them in the dark.
“If in winning a race, you lose the respect of your fellow competitors, then you have won nothing” - Paul Elvstrom "The Great Dane" 1928 - 2016 March 18, 2021, 09:34 PM
Sailor1911quote:
Originally posted by jimmy123x:
My grandmother was Irish and had a really bad temper if you set her off. When I was a little kid, my uncle set her off and she yelled at him "Ed, you son of a bitch!" so he paused and replied "But mom, that would make you a bitch" there was total silence in the entire room and her temper went away instantly.....I was around 7 years old and laughing at it......
Used that line on my Mom back in the day when I was young and foolish. Stunned her to silence, a rare occurrence when she was pissed. Then Dad cracked my upside the head from out of the blue, never saw it coming! But, it's legendary, family still recalls it!
Place your clothes and weapons where you can find them in the dark.
“If in winning a race, you lose the respect of your fellow competitors, then you have won nothing” - Paul Elvstrom "The Great Dane" 1928 - 2016 March 18, 2021, 10:05 PM
HuskySigquote:
Originally posted by flashguy:
quote:
Originally posted by HuskySig:
“I’m getting the Covid vaccine.”
That may seem stupid to you, but to those of us octagenarians it is not. I had my first shot 2 days ago.
Good luck
March 18, 2021, 10:16 PM
nasigquote:
Originally posted by HuskySig:
quote:
Originally posted by flashguy:
quote:
Originally posted by HuskySig:
“I’m getting the Covid vaccine.”
That may seem stupid to you, but to those of us octagenarians it is not. I had my first shot 2 days ago.
Good luck
March 19, 2021, 08:37 AM
PASigAs far as the “they look so good!” line you hear people saying at open-casket funerals:
If my grandmother caught someone saying that, she’d loudly say “NO...They look dead!”
March 19, 2021, 09:17 AM
joel9507From today's WSJ:
WSJ video: "SpaceX Prototype Landed Without Crashing, Then It Exploded 
Either dumb, or subtle doublespeak-black-humor.
March 19, 2021, 11:22 AM
tacfoleyquote:
Originally posted by Scoutmaster:
First, I might mention that 75% of my ancestry comes from the UK, not trying to demean such. I hope to go there to visit the regions of my family tree.
Some years ago a US gov't auditor, but very British, doing the annual cost incurred audit on our contracts, commented to me "you yanks are bloody ungrateful to us Brits for saving your "backsides" in WWII. You would have lost that war if it weren't for us".
And then flying from DFW to SFO, got upgraded to first class, sat next to a name brand fellow in the London symphony/opera industry. He showed me his scrapbook of himself with the various world personalities in his circle. He then told me I was lucky I lived in San Francisco (actually I was an hour south of there), because "America is an uncivilized nation. Manhattan and parts of San Francisco are the only places in the US with a proper culture".
Well, Sir, I've been here on this planet a little over 75 years, and that's the very first time I'm ever heard of comments like that being mentioned by a British person. All I can do is offer you one-eighth of an apology - that's ALL I can do, since I'm just one-eighth British.
Utter hogwash from both those persons, is really all I can say about it.
March 19, 2021, 11:51 AM
Scoutmasterquote:
Originally posted by tacfoley:. . . Well, Sir, I've been here on this planet a little over 75 years, and that's the very first time I'm ever heard of comments like that being mentioned by a British person. All I can do is offer you one-eighth of an apology - that's ALL I can do, since I'm just one-eighth British. . .
"Liberty lies in the hearts of men and women. When it dies there, no constitution, no law, no court can save it....While it lies there, it needs no constitution, no law, no court to save it"
- Judge Learned Hand, May 1944 March 19, 2021, 12:04 PM
Flash-LBquote:
Originally posted by tacfoley:
quote:
Originally posted by Scoutmaster:
First, I might mention that 75% of my ancestry comes from the UK, not trying to demean such. I hope to go there to visit the regions of my family tree.
Some years ago a US gov't auditor, but very British, doing the annual cost incurred audit on our contracts, commented to me "you yanks are bloody ungrateful to us Brits for saving your "backsides" in WWII. You would have lost that war if it weren't for us".
And then flying from DFW to SFO, got upgraded to first class, sat next to a name brand fellow in the London symphony/opera industry. He showed me his scrapbook of himself with the various world personalities in his circle. He then told me I was lucky I lived in San Francisco (actually I was an hour south of there), because "America is an uncivilized nation. Manhattan and parts of San Francisco are the only places in the US with a proper culture".
Well, Sir, I've been here on this planet a little over 75 years, and that's the very first time I'm ever heard of comments like that being mentioned by a British person. All I can do is offer you one-eighth of an apology - that's ALL I can do, since I'm just one-eighth British.
Utter hogwash from both those persons, is really all I can say about it.
There's a reason God put those people on an island.
March 19, 2021, 04:30 PM
OttoSigquote:
Originally posted by Hobbs:
"Early bird gets the worm" ... slow your roll, there's plenty of worms for everybody, I'm not getting up yet.
To which i always reply, "but the second mouse gets the cheese"
10 years to retirement! Just waiting! March 19, 2021, 04:46 PM
PHPaulquote:
Originally posted by PASig:
As far as the “they look so good!” line you hear people saying at open-casket funerals:
If my grandmother caught someone saying that, she’d loudly say “NO...They look dead!”
I got a lot of my sense of humor from my Dad. His favorite thing was to say something that was completely innocuous on the surface and then wait to see if you realized your leg was being pulled. When he did that, he'd get this twinkle in his eye and an almost unnoticeable Mona Lisa kind of smile. You wouldn't even notice if you didn't know to look for it.
Whoever prepared him for the funeral must've known him because he got that little smile exactly right. All six of us boys noticed it right away.
My point being there ARE times when commenting on the appearance of the deceased can be a positive thing.
That was in 1979 and I can still see it in my mind's eye.
Be careful when following the masses. Sometimes the M is silent.
March 19, 2021, 05:03 PM
adobesigI said it as a nervous student driver out practice driving. Mom saw twin boys from our church playing together while walking down the street and pointed them out. I said, "it sure must be nice to be twins, especially if you are the same age." Mom looked at me dumbfounded and commented that my football helmet was not as protective as she hoped.
March 19, 2021, 05:08 PM
GWbiker"You have to pass the bill before you can read it" - Nancy Pelosi.
*********
"Some people are alive today because it's against the law to kill them".
March 19, 2021, 06:02 PM
rexlesI have had many customers tell me " It's and easy job, shouldn't take you too long"
I tell them if it was easy you could have done it.
NRA Life member
NRA Certified Instructor
"Our duty is to serve the mission, and if we're not doing that, then we have no right to call what we do service" Marcus Luttrell
March 19, 2021, 06:06 PM
tacfoleyquote:
Originally posted by Flash-LB:There's a reason God put those people on an island.
But you are on an island, too, it's just rather bigger.
And did you actually READ what I wrote?
March 19, 2021, 06:19 PM
Scoutmasterquote:
Originally posted by GWbiker:
"You have to pass the bill before you can read it" - Nancy Pelosi.
I think that should go down in the top 5 list, in terms of how outlandish the statement, how harmful the result, and how many people swallowed and/or promoted it.
"Liberty lies in the hearts of men and women. When it dies there, no constitution, no law, no court can save it....While it lies there, it needs no constitution, no law, no court to save it"
- Judge Learned Hand, May 1944