When I was a kid my dad would take me to the cemetery in Marietta Georgia. I would either help put out flags, etc. Sometimes with my boyscout troop, other years with friends. this year it was me and my dad, and we were only putting out one flag. He lost a friend in Vietnam, a HS buddy and we were there looking him up and putting a flag on his marker.
At one grave there was a woman sitting quietly with it, and when she left, she left a woodland camo hat on top. I walked over and the young man had died in Vietnam (this was the early 80's). "Don't touch it son, it's not for you" my dad said. I left it there without disturbing it. But it haunted me. (The next morning a picture of it was on the front page of the Marietta daily but for the life of me I cant find it in the archives.)

I do not know how to feel these days. Sometimes I am chastised for grilling out, having a beer and/or watching a movie, others I am told to celebrate life for those who will not grow old. Which is it? One friend states I should basically spend the week reflecting and remembering, the other that it should be a type of Mardi Gra.

Over ten years ago, I signed up for a 30day subscription just to watch HBO's Baghdad ER. I had students and family in the war. It was billed as Authentic, maybe too much so. after reading this article I decided I needed to watch it. I wept, and I grieved.

I want to do right by those who gave the 'last full measure' but I am torn on how to do this. I will continue to remember the friends and family that we have lost recently, and far back. We have family that fought on both sides at Vicksburg.

You can honor the fallen by drinking a few in their memory. I don't think any of them would mind. In fact, I think they would appreciate a few beers and some dead cow to be consumed in their honor. I think it's overdoing it to be spending a week or even a day in monk mode. Memorial Day was originally Decoration Day, where the graves of Civil War fallen were decorated.

Just be respectful.

You can grill, you can drink. But do so with the memory that this day was given to you by the deaths of these men and women.

I personally hate the commercialization of Memorial day, I mean nothing says "Thank you" to the memories of these men and women more than a 50% percent off sale on mattresses .

I will get together with my father. We will grill and drink beer. We will trade the memories of those who are no longer with us, for it is those stories will keep their memories alive.

I have a couple traditions, I toast my fallen comrades and recite Joyce Kilmer’s the Rouge bouquet poem. Written In World War One by a member of the same unit I served in Iraq with. Joyce was killed in France in 1918. His poem lived on in the history of the 69th infantry regiment. Each time we lost a soldier in Iraq,the poem would be recited with that name added to the poems
Original names and the troops we previously lost. Taking a solemn uninterrupted time to honor the fallen is important for sure.
But would also agree enjoying the life we have to live to the fullest is also a way to honor our fallen.

I will read John McCrae's "In Flanders Fields" and cry (I always do--I am now, just thinking about it). It memorializes the original meaning of "Decoration Day".

In Flanders Fields
By John McCrae

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.



I have never been one for happy celebration of this day, but I'm not a griller and have no family. I do think any holiday can be a time for merriment, but this one should also contain some moments of quiet reflection and reverance.

flashguy

We lower the flag to half mast until noon, then hoist the flag to her full position.

I think the same should be done to remember the fallen, their sacrifice, and live the life that they would have lived.

Take some time to reflect on those lost, the cost, and be thankful for freedom.

Drink a beer, grill the dogs, have a great day with family and friends.

And never forget, every day should be lived and the desire to keep the things that our best have fought and died to preserve.

That is how we honor them.

I also like to read "High Flight" by John Gillespie Magee, Jr. It's not specific for Memorial Day, but it was written by a very young pilot who was only 19 when he died over England in WWII. I give a link this time, so the history can be viewed: http://arlingtoncemetery.net/highflig.htm .

flashguy

quote:

Originally posted by flashguy:
I will read John McCrae's "In Flanders Fields" and cry (I always do--I am now, just thinking about it). It memorializes the original meaning of "Decoration Day".

In Flanders Fields
By John McCrae

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.



I have never been one for happy celebration of this day, but I'm not a griller and have no family. I do think any holiday can be a time for merriment, but this one should also contain some moments of quiet reflection and reverance.

flashguy

'When you go home, tell them of us and say,
For your tomorrows we gave our today.'

We have our freedom due to those that gave their lives for it. As a Veteran and also someone who has lost a family member in war I think if you grasp that idea you can choose to “celebrate” Memorial Day however you wish. We live like we do because those that gave their lives can’t. Sitting around all weekend mourning won’t bring anyone back. Remember those that died giving us our freedom and do what you can to ensure freedom for future generations is never taken away. As long as our country is free and standing on what it was founded for the ones that died did not die in vain.
I know oodles of Veterans and not one has ever questioned how I spend Memorial Day.

Thank you guys so much. I really appreciate it. I do not know why this was bugging me so much, a veteran friend jumped on 'us' on facebook, and it caused me to doubt.

I will grill my dogs and burgers, I will fire my SBR in quiet mode and have my favorite beer. We will remember, and we are grateful.

Damn I love this forum.

As a vet I have always thought having a beer (or 3) is how those that had their check cashed would want it.

I normally will pour a drink for lost brothers or pour a bit on the earth as I do a shot to salute them.

One thing I have changed over the years is I do not say "happy" memorial day, I will say have a safe memorial day instead. Years ago my sons said to me, Happy Memorial Day....they meant well but I had to explain to them that the day is not a happy one but a day of reverence.

I will normally send an email to my employees, many of whom are vets, saluting lost comrades and gently reminding people of the real meaning

Commercialization of a holiday is as American as baseball and grilling but I do not have to participate.

Memorial day is not about being depressed and feeling sad.
We can show honor and respect to those that have died in war, and we should!
We can also continue to celebrate the good times that we can enjoy because of their sacrifice.

In addition to my previous post ( I would encourage people to look up the history of the Irish brigade and 1st battalion 69th infantry regiment to understand the great history of one of the honored units I served with, but also remind you what Patton said, do not mourn that such men died but rejoice that such men lived

#murph

I always have a cookout....this year is even more important because I am using gatherings like this to create outdoor socialization for my kids. Only reason I’m awake now is the smokers already cooking

It’s the only day of the year I drink. Generally it’s only a glass or two

At some point, though, I will want to be alone. Most times it will happen when I see something or hear something that reminds me of friends gone...

After that, who knows. Sometimes I can’t help but laugh outrageously about a funny memory....most of time, though, it comes about those that aren’t here when I Am. And I will look at my wife, and my children and will be so very grateful, in spite of my guilt.

Grill out. Enjoy the day. I know if the people I have lost were here they would without question

This is a celebration of the ultimate sacrifice.

It’s ok to be happy to be alive.

quote:

Originally posted by tacfoley:

quote:

Originally posted by flashguy:
I will read John McCrae's "In Flanders Fields" and cry (I always do--I am now, just thinking about it). It memorializes the original meaning of "Decoration Day".

In Flanders Fields
By John McCrae

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.



I have never been one for happy celebration of this day, but I'm not a griller and have no family. I do think any holiday can be a time for merriment, but this one should also contain some moments of quiet reflection and reverance.

flashguy

'When you go home, tell them of us and say,
For your tomorrows we gave our today.'

Thanks for posting that tac.

Enjoy your day, it'd be silly not to. While some of us will think about the friends we lost in combat, you civilians can just take a moment to appreciate the sacrifices that have been made for our country and our freedom. Any veteran that tries to give anyone shit for having a cookout on Memorial day is just an asshole.