More things to (hopefully) laugh about, from our retirees association...



You come from dust and you will return to dust. That's why I don't dust. It could be someone I know.

Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in the cafeteria at the mental hospital.

You're not fat, you're just easier to see.

For Sale: Parachute, only used once, never opened, small stain.

They say marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of Charades.

I'd like to live like a poor man, only with lots of money!

Yogi Berra once said; Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

Not in jail, not in a mental hospital, not in a grave- I guess I'm having a pretty good day!

This killing them with kindness is taking longer than I expected!

I started out with nothing. I still have most of it!

There is nothing scarier than that split second when you loose your balance in the shower and you think "THEY ARE GOING TO FIND ME NAKED."

One minute you're young and the next, you're turning down the stereo in your car to see better!

One day you will be able to tell your grandkids, "I survived the Great Toilet Paper Shortage of 2020."

And finally:
Never miss a good chance to shut up!.

Thanks for all of the reminders. Better to be on top of the dirt than under the dirt. Better to be seen rather than viewed. ........... drill sgt.

When you get up and go changed to got up and left.
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