No details will be given but this one was fairly close, not on a personal level as we didn’t know each other, but same rank, same positions, just a different department.

And the Holidays are here…it just sucks is all.

Service-related or not. What a bad thing all around…I tend to despise things I don’t have answers to and this is definitely one of those things.

Y’all support those around ya this season, whether you know em or not. You just never know.

First may this person RIP. Damn shame.

The reality is it is rooted in marketing and absolute bullshit. TV advertisements of perfect people in perfect red sweaters, everyone loves each other, drinking egg nog, decorating a tree, a perfect fire lit in the background, everyone laughing having the time of their lives. It’s all marketing bullshit. If the thing to do was jump off cliffs around a holiday and that’s what everyone was doing I wouldn’t do it. The reality for many is it’s the most stressful time of year because of marketing. Buying consumer goods and feeling family, friend, work pressure is not what Christ would want for you.

I’ve spent most holidays at home by myself and couldn’t care less. Christmas is about Christ. It’s literally in the name. And Christ walked the Earth dealing and helping people everyone else tossed to the side, IE that the mainstream left behind. It’s a damn shame hearing about people having the marketing of Christmas affect them in this way. They think because they aren’t doing the wear the sweater everything is perfect thing so they feel left out, cast aside, and inferior. It all becomes too much for them to take so they take their own life. It’s a damn shame.

I’m truly sorry for the loss and sorry if my very opinionated opinion offends anyone as that was not my intent. I think it’s important to state the truth, the reality. And the reality is this will all be over, the holidays, in less than 2 weeks. So if you’re having a hard time, we are here, and just turn the bullshit off for a little while longer and we will be in a new year. All the idiots will be broke come mid January, just like every year, when the credit card bills come in, the roads will have half the traffic, and you won’t feel left out any longer. Once you start to understand the made up fantasy land the holidays has been marketed as maybe you’ll understand to ignore it and not let it affect you. Go lift some weights, or exercise. Watch something you really like that brings you joy. A film, an old game, a documentary, fill your time with something you enjoy doing and turn all the nonsense off.

Sorry for the deceased and their next of kin.

I remember during my active duty days back in the Mesozoic era (mid to late 90’s) the various Chaplins stating that suicides seemed to spike during the holidays. Sadly it seems the Chaplins were correct.

Expectations are often hard to live up to, and one's harshest critic is usually oneself.

Condolences to the family and loved ones of the deceased.

I too have survived far too many suicides. One sibling, two brothers-in-law (both married the same sibling of my wife’s, no less), one EMS partner, one officemate, a classmate in high school, and four acquaintances.

I’m just across that raging impassable torrent known as the Potomac River. If you’d like to meet for coffee, let me know.

quote:

Originally posted by Sig2340:
I too have survived far too many suicides. One sibling, two brothers-in-law (both married the same sibling of my wife’s, no less), one EMS partner, one officemate, a classmate in high school, and four acquaintances.

I’m just across that raging impassable torrent known as the Potomac River. If you’d like to meet for coffee, let me know.

I certainly appreciate it, and I’ll keep it in mind. Headed down to a campground near Richmond this weekend. Maybe after the Holidays we can meet up for some lunch or dinner.

Very sorry to hear this, OttoSig.

Just last weekend I was re-reading an email from an old friend, sent to me about 15 years ago... just a year or so before his own suicide. It's tough to deal with, even this long past.

There are plenty of ears around you, if you need one.

quote:

Originally posted by Prefontaine:

it is rooted in marketing and absolute bullshit.

That's life in general, preconceived notions. People say "I'm not happy." My thought, and I have said it to people, "Where did you get the idea you were supposed to be happy?"

(What makes you think you're supposed to be? Really? You think you're here to be happy? What would be the point of that? What would you learn from that?)

22 Vets a day, gentlemen. That’s the stat.

Check in on your brothers from time-to-time.

quote:

Originally posted by cas:

quote:

Originally posted by Prefontaine:

it is rooted in marketing and absolute bullshit.

That's life in general, preconceived notions. People say "I'm not happy." My thought, and I have said it to people, "Where did you get the idea you were supposed to be happy?"

(What makes you think you're supposed to be? Really? You think you're here to be happy? What would be the point of that? What would you learn from that?)

Well, you’re right of course.

Looking at it another way, being happy is a choice. One can choose to be unhappy about the things the things that aren’t going their way, or they can choose to be happy about the things that are. Same person, same situation, but attitude makes all the difference in the world.

When I get feeling down, I take a minute to consider how many people are out there who might literally kill to have my problems rather than theirs. It seems to help with perspective, at least for me.

quote:

Originally posted by cas:

quote:

Originally posted by Prefontaine:

it is rooted in marketing and absolute bullshit.

That's life in general, preconceived notions. People say "I'm not happy." My thought, and I have said it to people, "Where did you get the idea you were supposed to be happy?"

(What makes you think you're supposed to be? Really? You think you're here to be happy? What would be the point of that? What would you learn from that?)

My point was so many people look at other people, the tv, social media, etc, and think they need to be doing what everyone else is doing. My answer to that is no. Instead of living their own life, they are living the marketing life. What advertisers and consumer product mfr’s tell them they should be doing. If your happiness is tied into doing what everyone else is doing you are going to be unhappy and bitterly disappointed because all that shit is as fake as a $3 bill. I’ve never seen a rule book that states you need to do X on Y holiday or holidays. Once you free yourself from that marketing machine that goes on all year with each holiday, you’re free to live your own life and that nonsense won’t bother you at all. But that machine has a hold of people, and this is the worst time of year for it and them. I’ve dated women, had close friends as well, where I showed them the red pill and nope. Blue every time. So many are just unwilling to detach from it. Can you imagine? God, or whatever you personally believe, gave you this life. You only get one. It’s a gift that you need to treasure. And they spend it doing the Joneses. I try to help the ones I can but so many just don’t want to hear it. They are just too programmed and unwilling to change. Like a drug addict who refuses to go to treatment.

It certainly is a problem for our service members, but not just service members.

Years ago I worked in a high-tempo industry, working 12 hour night shifts that frequently stretched to 14 hours + . My particular job involved wearing a pager around my neck, with dozens of pages and emails per shift, a slew of technical issues, often complicated by people/ personnel conflicts or manpower issues. I typically covered 8-10 miles of ground per shift.

It was December and we had just received a new hire to our shift and area, a middle-aged woman, fresh out of a week of orientation training. Even though she had just certified on a specific tool set, I was experienced enough to know that newly certified operators often have questions.

In addition to all my technical and training duties I was also in a leadership role.

One night she approached me with some friendly small talk, but she caught me in a really busy chain of time sensitive tasks, and while I didn't completely ignore her, I only gave her a brief curt reply.

Our regularly scheduled shift worked until a day or two before Christmas, before our scheduled days off arrived to include Christmas. When we returned a few days later to start our next shift, she was absent. During our first pass-down (briefing) our supervisor notified our team that she had committed suicide over our days off and then proceeded to counsel our team on the resources that were available to us all.

She was with our team for less than a month, and I can't even remember her name now, but I'll never forgive myself for not taking a few minutes out of my busy night just to try and make her feel welcome or part of our team. I usually saved that for team meetings or team building exercises, or in just intervening when I could help a team member out.

I just didn't realize she was in trouble.

OttoSig, real sorry about the loss of this member to your Command. My condolences to the family, friends, and co-workers.

quote:

Originally posted by OttoSig:

quote:

Originally posted by Sig2340:
I too have survived far too many suicides. One sibling, two brothers-in-law (both married the same sibling of my wife’s, no less), one EMS partner, one officemate, a classmate in high school, and four acquaintances.

I’m just across that raging impassable torrent known as the Potomac River. If you’d like to meet for coffee, let me know.

I certainly appreciate it, and I’ll keep it in mind. Headed down to a campground near Richmond this weekend. Maybe after the Holidays we can meet up for some lunch or dinner.

I’m going to Richmond on Christmas Day. We could have coffee there, in civilization south of the Rappahannock if you’d like.

Sad. Good help is available for active duty military. That was the whole point of Military One Source. NOTHING goes back to the command. There is also help for active duty through Tricare although authorization is needed. Of course you have to ask for help.

Twenty-five years ago this weekend, one of our RAF police corporals went off shift at 12 midday, but instead of going straight home to his wife and family, parked his car up in a supermarket carpark, walked half a mile down the road to the main north-south rail line and waited until he saw the afternoon London-to-Edinburgh express train coming around the bend, at about 145 mph.

According to the driver, he ran down the side of the rail cutting, and down the track to meet the train.

Nobody ever figured out the reason for this incredibly messy ending. No note, no hint, no debts, no nasty little secrets. Zero.

A pal of mine, a police officer at the time, was part of the clear-up squad.