All I can tell you is what sargents have told their troops forever.
Here's what they all said: Don't marry foreign women. They will say anything, do anything, be anything in order to get you to marry them and after a few years, you go from being King Shit in their eyes to being Dip Shit.
I've seen it myself a number of times with people I know.
The Philippines is a matriarchal society. She may be culturally conditioned to give deference to her mother's wishes, even if she can't or won't articulate to you why. This may be irritating to some westerners who are not used to this.
Edit: I wrote a bunch, but decided that generalizations may be more harmful than helpful. The above is just a socially/culturally significant fact that might help you navigate your relationship.
Posts: 12329 | Location: Orange County, California | Registered: May 19, 2002
To me, there are all types of women - race / ethnicity is incidental. Generalizations may be problematic in this context.
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Originally posted by konata88: To me, there are all types of women - race / ethnicity is incidental. Generalizations may be problematic in this context.
This. Different cultures may have different dynamics, but women think/feel so differently than men that the cultural differences pale next to the differences between women and men.
Beyond that, absolutely look at the family dynamic. A wise old friend of mine once said, “Take a good long look at your potential future mother in law. The daughter may well end up acting (and looking, though that is less important to most) a lot like her mother. If you can’t stand the mother, think long and hard before you marry the daughter.
Not that I’m any kind of expert - I’ve only been married once and she’s only been putting up with me for a little over thirty years. ETA, well a little over thirty two if you count the two years to the day between the first date and the wedding. Here’s hoping she never comes to her senses.
Originally posted by Aeteocles: The Philippines is a matriarchal society. She may be culturally conditioned to give deference to her mother's wishes, even if she can't or won't articulate to you why. This may be irritating to some westerners who are not used to this.
Quoted for emphasis. I'd also add this: In casual observations of the culture, Filipino women wear the pants in their marriage to Filipino men. I've worked with a number of the men & it seemed pretty clear. Of course, as with any stereotype there could be exceptions.
"We're all travelers in this world. From the sweet grass to the packing house. Birth 'til death. We travel between the eternities."
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