haven't had a land line in almost 15 years

I'm debating about going back to just a landline, as I can set it to require the caller to give a name.

There used to be a screener to require a caller to enter a code but they aren't made anymore.

I think the man should be branded and have his name and face printed on toilet paper

It's an oldie but a goodie... tar and feathers comes to mind.