For anyone who's seen Citizen Kane you understand the meaning of Rosebud. For those who haven't, it's that rememberence of a simpler time or calm or peace in your life. That moment you always loved and never forgot.

The other night I was reading an article about the film and of course it's a memorable scene. But I thought to myself, what would be my equivalent moment. Not necessarily something from childhood, but then looked across the room and was immediately reminded. I have a print hanging from a photographer (one who did a much better job than myself) of a spot in Red Rock Canyon outside of Vegas. Immediately reminded of a trip there of better memories as what followed coming home was bad news after bad news that really made 2019 far worse than 2020 could have ever been for me. But seeing that pic during last year, and even now, really made me grateful for that week there and everything that led up to it.

So what's your item or something that sparks a memory that makes you miss that moment of peace or calm or love?

Warm summer evenings when the work was done. In the yard with my kids as they played, when they were small. The whine of their little electric power wheels jeep they used to drive around in. The smell of fresh cut grass.

I have a several items from my grandmother's kitchen that I often use, including the butter dish that used to live on my grandmother's kitchen table. All the items are 70+ years old. Every time I use those items, I briefly (usually) think back to the times when all the family gathered at grandmother's and granddad's on Sundays after church and holidays. The grandparents and that house are long ago gone but the "Rosebud" memories remain.

Looking out across the valley from my Grandparents front yard in Berry, Ky.

It's an activity I call "Ghost chasing". Christmas Eve late after any and all family and friends activities have passed I get in my car with a coffee and set out for a drive. By places that meant something to me at some point in my life.

Two or three hours later, I come home. Can't describe the feeling, a calm and peaceful feeling though.

A Christmas one. My cousins and I setting up the luminaries in front of her house on Christmas Eve. The luminaries were white paper lunch bags with sand on the bottom and a candle. Then going in and having hot chocolate and the family dinner. Most of the participants are gone now, but it was a great moment in time.

Playing baseball with the neighborhood kids when I was young. And baseball cards.

A certain small valley with a beautiful stream on our family farm. I used to go there up to when I was a teen. Reminded me of an English scene. Lots of boulders at the stream undisturbed for centuries probBly.

Dad decided to cut timber, and that valley was ruined

Some times have been better than others, but pretty much life keeps getting better. Holding a newborn grand child, teaching him to bake as he grows, all to that....yeah, old times were good, but current times are better. Now I have time.

Some of the memories....well, I clearly recall riding on a flatcar under armored vehicles in the winter in Korea. Not so very good.

Holding my son when he was two minutes old. Dang, seems like yesterday.

Most anytime spent in the woods. for deer or squirrel. Kept me sane through some incredibly stressful years.

When I was quite young we lived on a place with a few acres, usually one cow, some chickens; one of my chores was to collect the eggs. One day my sister’s prize rooster, Old Red, attacked me when I had a can of eggs. My Dad got out his Colt Woodsman and that was the end of Big Red.

I did have the “open range” childhood many of you had, and did enjoy that. But my parents were divorced when I was 10. My oldest sister took her life not long after. My Mom had to work at menial jobs. I was never chosen for the baseball team. In high school, the shop kids locked me in the wood cabinet.

But as an adult, I married a wonderful woman, became a cardiologist, we had three terrific kids, and now two delightful granddaughters.

Unlike Kane, maybe my Rosebud moment is now.

SJTill I can identify somewhat. I lived a middle class life in 1950s early 60s until about 11 when my father lost his executive position due to a corporate buyout. Parental split soon followed along with a lifestyle change. Lived with mom in dingy apt often with no electricity, no phone and sometime food scarcity during high school years. High school was a nightmare. Took years to find my way and path. Tried many paths.

Eventually developed career, finished education and developed some expertise in my field. Retied at 63 to the Texas Hill Country. At 72, these are indeed the best years.

maxdog, I will say that I am glad I had to work to buy my clothes in high school, work my way through college, and do not regret not going to a big-name school as an undergraduate. I did well enough I ended up going to a big-name medical school. But later I saw that it didn't matter where you trained, nobody cared once you were all working together, it was just a matter of how good you were, and how well you got along with others.

Sjtill, My wife, who worked many years as a heart cath lab nurse once told me there were docs who “ looked good on Paper” (went to the right prestigious school and had all the right diplomas etc) and then there were the docs who you would send your family or yourself to if you needed medical help. Indeed, the medical staff (RNs, xray techs etc) know who’s really concerned about patients and works well with a team and who’s a pampered egotist. The RNs and other staff know who’s good. The staff knows who gets it done and with whom they would rather entrust their own or family’s care.It comes down to a lot more than resume bullet points she said.

I finished my bachelors at a state school satellite campus and finished the last two years at night. A prof once pointed out that most all schools use the same text books and class guides no matter how “ prestigious they were, especially at the undergrad level. Indeed, many classes at the big schools are taught by grad students standing in for the famous prof. His point was that all in all, they’re fairly equal.

You did very very well. Sounds like you were the right kinda doc.

Well, gosh, Maxdog....

Your wife is exactly right. In fact I used to advocate ignoring references from physicians and asking nurses about the docs when we were looking at physician candidates for our medical group.

Recently my son was hospitalized in Texas. I went to be there and do what I could, and I made sure to ask the nurses what they thought of the various doctors. They know, and they’re happy to share.

If you live your life as right as you can, treating everyone well along the way, you will have no regrets at the end.