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| Bookers Bourbon and a good cigar  |
A 76-year-old man is having a drink in a Bar. Suddenly a gorgeous girl enters and sits down a few seats away. The girl is so attractive that he just can't take his eyes off her. After a short while, the girl notices him staring, and approaches him. Before the man has time to apologize, the girl looks him deep in the eyes and says to him in a sultry tone: "I'll do anything you'd like. Anything you can imagine in your wildest dreams, it doesn't matter how extreme or unusual it is, I'm game. I want $100, and there's another condition". Completely stunned by the sudden turn of events, the man asks her what her condition is. "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words". The man takes a moment to consider the offer from the beautiful woman. He then whips out his wallet and puts ten - $10 bills in her outstretched hand. He then looks her square in the eyes, and says slowly and clearly: "Paint my house." Our needs change as we get older. If you're goin' through hell, keep on going. Don't slow down. If you're scared don't show it. You might get out before the devil even knows you're there. NRA ENDOWMENT LIFE MEMBER | ||
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A Grateful American |
Good thing he didn't say: "Paint my Porch." "the meaning of life, is to give life meaning" ✡ Ani Yehudi אני יהודי Le'olam lo shuv לעולם לא שוב! | |||
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SIG's 'n Surefires |
I see what you did there! "Common sense is wisdom with its sleeves rolled up." -Kyle Farnsworth "Freedom of Speech does not guarantee freedom from consequences." -Mike Rowe "Democracies aren't overthrown, they're given away." -George Lucas | |||
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Set out once to become the world's greatest procrastinator, but never got around to it |
Made my day and so early in the morning on the west coast! Thanks! (Being over 70, it has a certain ring of truth or appeal that I'm now concerned about...)  ___________________________________________ The annual soothsayers and fortunetellers conference has been canceled due to unforeseen circumstances. | |||
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Baroque Bloke |
Paint my porch? Reminds me of this one: A guy responds to a knock on his door, and finds a girl, a blonde stranger. She tells him that she’s a college student, in need of money, and asks if he would pay her for doing some odd job. He asks if she would paint the porch at the back of his house for $50. He has the paint and brush all ready for that job. She agrees, takes the paint and brush, and heads to the back of the house. An hour later she knocks on the door again, and tells him that she’s finished the job. And she adds, “By the way, that’s not a Porch – it’s a Ferrari.” Serious about crackers | |||
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Political Cynic |
 [B] Against ALL enemies, foreign and DOMESTIC | |||
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| Min-Chin-Chu-Ru... Speed with Glare |
Old man answers the door to see a beautiful woman standing there. She asks him, "Would you like some hot, super sex?" He thinks a minute and says, "I'll take the soup." | |||
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