We have a 12 year old Border Collie/Aussie mix that has some health problems, but nothing serious or “terminal”. He causes a lot of friction between my wife and I and we are at a point where something needs to be done.

Health/behavior issues consist of very bad teeth that we cannot justify the expense for treatment ($1000+). He doesn’t seem to be bothered by them, has no trouble eating, but every time he sees the vet it comes up.

The problem causing friction is he can’t/won’t hold his urine. He is an indoor dog who is out VERY frequently and relieves himself almost every time his out. Yet he “sneak pees” in the house frequently. We have been getting carpets cleaned 3-4x a year. We are at the point now of needing to replace carpeting. We are NEVER able to catch him so difficult to try and address/train.

Final behavior issue is being a herding dog, he wants to herd. Anytime someone goes out with him he starts jumping/nipping. We have a 6yo grandson who is terrified of him because he will knock him down and while he has never “bitten” he does nip/mouth which scares our grandson who doesn’t understand the difference. My 88yo Dad lives with us and he has nearly been knocked over multiple times by the boisterous herding behavior. We have tried to “train it out of him”, but have been unable to do so.

He also has serious separation anxiety issues and is very attached to our other dog, so much so that if by himself in the kennel (can’t be trusted unattended in the house) he will howl endlessly and has literally chewed through chain link. He becomes a basket case of anxiety until someone returns.

Everyone is saying it is time to have him put down, but I can’t help but feel guilt over that as his quality of life is not “that bad”... it is everyone else’s quality of life that is suffering.


The other option is the local shelter takes in “Surrendered Pets” and tries to find them a home. I am not sure how likely that would be given his inability to be alone, age, urination problems, herding/nipping, etc. I fear the shelter would most likely end up euthanizing him as well. No way I would “re-home” him to a stranger as his behavior could subject him to abuse from someone not able to deal with it.


My dilemma then is whether to just man up and do it myself, or “chicken out” and give him a second chance?


Realistically, it would likely have the same outcome, only after potentially spending weeks in a strange place without the comfort of his dog buddy and family. Not sure if giving him a second chance would be doing him any favor as it could potentially be worse being stressed out in unfamiliar surroundings.


I’d appreciate thoughts and experiences from others who may have been in a similar position, something needs to be decided soon as we are at wits end.

quote:

Originally posted by OMCHamlin:
There are breed specific Rescues that would take him from you and either help resolve his issues that came about through lack of early training or even late age dementia, which can and do cause new issues to display themselves in an older dog's behavior.
Please, please google one in your area, I would have looked for you, but I cannot discern your location by "Just stumbling through, trying to avoid a premature banjackulation of my own doing... ", or I would have and sent you some more specific suggestions. A rescue usually has a volunteer staff that works with troubled dogs and if they cannot adopt them out, they will often foster them throughout the balance of their canine lives, ensuring that whereever they end up, they are properly cared for and about.
Here's wishing the best of luck to the dog...

Seattle WA area. Being a mix, I wasn’t aware of that as an option

quote:

Not sure if giving him a second chance would be doing him any favor as it could potentially be worse being stressed out in unfamiliar surroundings.

I wouldn't even consider it. Why the heck would you torture your dog for the last bit of it's life? You know, no one would adopt him. He'd sit in a cage confused and alone before being given the needle. Please, please don't do this (coming from someone who completely and utterly hates dogs).

You need to decide if it's time to end his life, not push that responsibility to others while simultaneously making the poor pup miserable.

If adoption is even an option then, he probably doesn't need to be euthanized and this decision is for your comfort, not his.

I can't suggest what is the right decision for you, but adopting him out his definitely the wrong decision.

I always give dogs 2nd 3rd and more chances. My old BC now is having seizures almost daily and she is on meds, yes there are occasional potty issues. We have 9 other dogs, (yes 10 total) one has 3 legs and one eye she is older now too and needs special attention. But they all still come to me or any of the family and want attention. They trust us and know we take care of them even if they do have some little idiosyncrasies.
Until the animal is no longer "smiling" and we've had enough to know when that is.
I NEVER GIVE UP ON THEM. They are always happy to see me.

I'm sort of grasping here because your situation is quite different than I had. But try limiting water for the pee problem. We had a rescue that was an outdoor dog and was used to just letting pee out whenever. He'd just be walking and peeing. We thought it was medical. After a bunch of tests we just gave him water with his food and the problem went away.

I was in the same position a few years back.

Neurotic dog that couldn't be re-homed, trusted only 3 or 4 people, had health problems that needed constant attention (bad hips) and was 11 years old.

When my wife was diagnosed with allergies to pet hair, something had to be done, and done NOW.

Given the above, the merciful thing was to euthanize her. Cried just like I've done for every other dog I've had to put down, but it was the right thing.

To be honest, MY main concern is for my Dad. If he were to be knocked over and injured at his age I would be beside myself. Not fair to the dog to keep him penned up, just trying to find the best resolution.

I found a Border Collie rescue in Oregon, have already sent email.

I can't address the other issues, but as to the urinating in the house, we solved this by getting two Velcro band that goes around the body of our dog. We would put feminine napkins inside the band to absorb the pee.

If the pee soaked through the napkin and the band was wet we always had a fresh band to swap out while we washed the wet one.

Perhaps eliminating the urinating problem will help to remove one of the obstacles?

quote:

Originally posted by 911Boss:
To be honest, MY main concern is for my Dad. If he were to be knocked over and injured at his age I would be beside myself.

Reading you post, that was my concern as well.

I love my dogs, but in the end humans - especially vulnerable humans (children / elderly) have priority.

Glad you are looking for a rescue but in the end hard choices are going to have to be made.

Consider this: canine dementia. I had no idea that cats and dogs can suffer this, but it is a fact. My son has a much loved, very tiny deaf cat who is now 12 years old. It began having a lot of problems and the Vet diagnosed as dementia. Since I heard about this situation from my son, I have read up on it and some of the things going on with your dog seem very similar to symptoms of canine dementia.
We get old.... even our pets. Good luck with your dog.

When you check with the rescues, be perfectly honest. And share your fears as well.
They should be able to help you assess and determine the best answer.
Best odds may be if it stays with you while they try and find the right fit. As someone who worked in breed rescue (not this breed), complete honesty really is best (including your fears for the dog’s wellbeing, and your family’s.

You might be surprised at what an educated stranger may be willing to take on, and also the adaptability of your dog to a new environment.

Sometimes a reset button gets pushed, and a whole new personality can develop in that new environment.

Best of luck, and thank you for considering other options before coming to any final decision.

ETA:

Btw, a rescue group isn’t going to “cage” him. I can’t speak for all shelters, either, but most have runs and do their best to exercise the displaced pets they have.
The rescue is going to find an experienced foster home that works on the concerns and THEN place him. It can sometimes takes months before the right fit comes up. I know because I’ve fostered dogs that long, and I know it can be easy to believe no one is going to care for, or love the dog as much as you, that no one will really understand... but look into it. You may be surprised.

My snap judgement would be a farm life with a cozy barn, a nice family that understands this is a “retirement home” and a couple other herding dogs or barn cats for company.

Your dog likely has a few more years or more of life. Consider a breed specific rescue as some have said or at a minimum a no kill shelter if you are not able to deal with the time and potential costs of helping him.

I am sorry to sound harsh at all. I work part-time for a non profit no kill shelter and we see everything you can imagine and worse. We would rather see you give up your pet and it have a chance at a new life with someone than for you to put it down when there is still plenty of quality of life left.

If you are unable to afford professional training, proper exercise, giving him a job (as this breed absolutely must have) then rehome him.

If you cannot afford the dental care the vet recommends then rehome him. Even if you think it is not bothering him the dental issues can cause animals to act out in other ways if they are in pain. We see this A LOT. Also dental issues can lead to serious infections including some that can cause cardiovascular issues.


The urinary issues could be neurologic, an infection (very common), behavioral (see all of the above) and even emotional based on upheaval in household. Living situation changes decrease in time spent with him etc.


Please give him a chance with someone else. We have had many dogs get adopted to homes who are prepared for all of this. Even recently two seniors who were incontinent due to age, etc. found a home with a family that could provide unconditional love and care.

Good luck to him.

This sounds terrible but we had to have a cat (13 years old) put down because she kept peeing in the house. We had a mobile vet put her down at our house. A really shitty situation. I feel for you.

After all this today my Benji girl had a grand mal seizure and passed over the rainbow bridge



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[QUOTE]Originally posted by Nframe:
After all this today my Benji girl had a grand mal seizure and passed over the rainbow bridge. [QUOTE]

I’m so sorry.

NFrame - I am sorry to hear/read about Benji. A painful loss of such a beautiful friend.