We have one child, we cannot have anymore of our own children. My wife was looking into adopting a child and we really do not have much of an idea of the process.

Our daughter is 4 years old. Was looking at adopting a boy similar in age to balance out the family.

Not really interested in adopting a child from China. Not sure why that seems so common, just not our thing.

What was the process and experience like?

Expenses?

Vetting process?

What questions should I be asking?

How can we prepare ourselves for this?

I have not, but I hope it’s ok to say I wish you the best of luck.

My experiences were negative. PM me for details, I don't want to post them publicly. I recommend you go private, not county.

Edmond, if you don't get any responses I could relay your questions to my sister and BIL. They adopted 3 siblings from Hungary just last year.

Their journey started about 5 years ago. I know they used a faith based agency to guide them through the process.

They spent upwards of $40,000 and there were some bumps along the way. They were originally paired to a couple of brothers out of Poland and received pictures and dossiers and became attached of course. But before the adoption was to take place Poland put a freeze on adoptions so that they could re-evaluate the country's procedures. In the end that adoption fell through as Poland changed their stance on adoption abroad and moved to push for adoptions within their borders.

They moved on from Poland to Hungary and are now parents of a 5 year old boy, 8 year old girl, and 12 year old girl. I guess they just thought it would be cheaper to get all the kids at one time...which is definitely true.

If I can be of assistance let me know.

We adopted a baby girl 30 yrs ago.
It was a private adoption and out of state.
Biggest hassle was dealing with attorneys.
It was pricey, we paid for birth mothers lawyer in NY, our lawyer in NY and our lawyer in OH. We agreed to pay birth mothers hospital exspenses her dads insurance would not cover. We used Jewish Family Services to do our home study. Our choice was Lutheran Family service, or Catholic Family Services. We picked Jewish Fam. because of the way the charge was structured, paying less up front and more when finished. That way if the birth parents backed out at the last minute, we were out less money. 30 yrs ago and I am not exact on the dollar amount for the process but it was around $25k for the whole deal.
Hope this helps. If you would like more info PM me and I'll shoot you my phone number.

I Keep thinking about adopting.

I have a beautiful 12 year old girl from Guatemala. We brought her home shortly before her second birthday.

The short answer is to do a lot of research.I strongly recommend going through an agency. Find one with a long, reliable track record, whether faith based or not. Be prepared for a long, grueling process.

We wanted to go international because there was less chance of the birth mother backing out at the last second, and we wouldn't have to deal with the biological family wanting to be a part of her life years later.

We initially chose China because, while it typically took longer, the placement rate was near 100%. It is not uncommon, with many countries, for the rules to suddenly change, or even for all adoptions to be halted abruptly. Adoption programs are an easy political pawn to play, and many countries cut them off arbitrarily for petty political reasons.

The China time frames started to get longer, though, so we switched to Guatemala. Everything went pretty smoothly, by adoption standards, but our girl was still one of the last ones out before they shut down that program.

I am an attorney, and even I was shocked by the complexity and volume of paperwork and intrusion. Every aspect of your personal lives must be laid bare, you must comply with a number of absurd requirements, and the expense was in the tens of thousands of dollars.

Was it worth it? Absolutely!!!!

Can't help with your question but admire your willingness to do this for a child. And the others that post here that already did so.
Hopefully in a decade or two, that grown child will be your reward and appreciate what you did on their behalf.

My wife is/was adopted and her parents owned a private adoption agency in Houston. I can volunteer her to answer questions for you! . Feel free to PM me.

Going to be frank and to the point. I’ll give you the low down on how I adopted in Alabama.

I went through our county DHR to foster. Went through a 10 week class for the license. You can try before you buy. If a child is not a good fit in your family via foster care, you tell DHR and they find a new home. If they are a good fit and they come up for adoption, you get first dibs. There are way more kids that need homes than are homes available. I have 2 sibling groups of 3. Once you decide to adopt a foster child through The state, it’s approx 500-1k per child for lawyer fees. Cheap compared to going private or out of country. I do it for the joy of seeing children flourish in a stable environment. There is no other joy that even compares.

Just as an example, my 17 year old son was 10 when we started fostering him. He was 12 when I adopted him. He had seen violence his whole life. Mom bouncing from boyfriend to boyfriend. Mom getting beaten up over and over. Drugs, alcohol, you name it. This is how he thought woman should be treated. He had lots of anger issues. Through a stable environment, lots of love and prayer, he slowly changed. I trust this boy now with my life. He is my side kick. My reward is seeing this change.

Do we have bad days? Sure, just like any family would. Heck I have 7 teens in my house but, we are all family and love each other.

Depends if you want to go private or through the state.

My brother went through the state, my wife and i have tried private. My brothers adoption went well, there are always challenges but his son is thriving now.

The private route did not work out for me in the end, but it can work. Ill send you an email and you can respond if you want, Ill be happy to share the process with you.