When God Sends You Help, don't Ask Questions

February 14, 2018, 10:20 AM

She hurried to the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys inside.

The woman found an old rusty coat hanger left on the ground. She looked at it and said,
"I don't know how to use this." She bowed her head and asked God to send her some HELP.

Within 5 minutes a beat-up old motorcycle pulled up, driven by a bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag. He got off of his cycle and asked if he could help.

She said: "Yes, my daughter is sick. I've locked my keys in my car.

I must get home. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?"

He said, “Sure.”

He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car was open.

She hugged the man and through tears said, "Thank You, God, for sending me such a very nice man."

The man heard her little prayer and replied, "Lady, I am NOT a nice man. I just got out of prison yesterday; I was in prison for car theft."

The woman hugged the man again, sobbing, "Oh, thank you, God! You even sent me a Professional!"

Is GOD Great or What?

Luckily, I have enough willpower to control the driving ambition that rages within me.

When you had the votes, we did things your way. Now, we have the votes and you will be doing things our way. This lesson in political reality from Lyndon B. Johnson

"Some things are apparent. Where government moves in, community retreats, civil society disintegrates and our ability to control our own destiny atrophies. The result is: families under siege; war in the streets; unapologetic expropriation of property; the precipitous decline of the rule of law; the rapid rise of corruption; the loss of civility and the triumph of deceit. The result is a debased, debauched culture which finds moral depravity entertaining and virtue contemptible." - Justice Janice Rogers Brown

February 14, 2018, 10:25 AM

Nick

Help and redemption in the same incident. Yep, God is great!

February 14, 2018, 10:50 AM

Pipe Smoker

This forum needs a “like” button.

February 14, 2018, 11:14 AM

zoom6zoom

the one I was expecting from the thread title:

A storm descends on a small town, and the downpour soon turns into a flood. As the waters rise, the local preacher kneels in prayer on the church porch, surrounded by water. By and by, one of the townsfolk comes up the street in a canoe.

"Better get in, Preacher. The waters are rising fast."

"No," says the preacher. "I have faith in the Lord. He will save me."

Still the waters rise. Now the preacher is up on the balcony, wringing his hands in supplication, when another guy zips up in a motorboat.

"Come on, Preacher. We need to get you out of here. The levee's gonna break any minute."

Once again, the preacher is unmoved. "I shall remain. The Lord will see me through."

After a while the levee breaks, and the flood rushes over the church until only the steeple remains above water. The preacher is up there, clinging to the cross, when a helicopter descends out of the clouds, and a state trooper calls down to him through a megaphone.

"Grab the ladder, Preacher. This is your last chance."

Once again, the preacher insists the Lord will deliver him.

And, predictably, he drowns.

A pious man, the preacher goes to heaven. After a while he gets an interview with God, and he asks the Almighty, "Lord, I had unwavering faith in you. Why didn't you deliver me from that flood?"

God shakes his head. "What did you want from me? I sent you two boats and a helicopter."

February 14, 2018, 11:16 AM

Elk Hunter

quote:
Originally posted by Pipe Smoker:
This forum needs a “like” button.

Do not have a "like" button, but I like that story!

And yes, God is ALWAYS faithful. Sometimes it may not seem like it to us, but it is nonetheless true!

Elk

There has never been an occasion where a people gave up their weapons in the interest of peace that didn't end in their massacre. (Louis L'Amour)

"To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical. "
-Thomas Jefferson

"America is great because she is good. If America ceases to be good, America will cease to be great." Alexis de Tocqueville

FBHO!!!

The Idaho Elk Hunter

February 14, 2018, 11:18 AM

Elk Hunter

quote:
Originally posted by zoom6zoom:
the one I was expecting from the thread title:

A storm descends on a small town, and the downpour soon turns into a flood. As the waters rise, the local preacher kneels in prayer on the church porch, surrounded by water. By and by, one of the townsfolk comes up the street in a canoe.

"Better get in, Preacher. The waters are rising fast."

"No," says the preacher. "I have faith in the Lord. He will save me."

Still the waters rise. Now the preacher is up on the balcony, wringing his hands in supplication, when another guy zips up in a motorboat.

"Come on, Preacher. We need to get you out of here. The levee's gonna break any minute."

Once again, the preacher is unmoved. "I shall remain. The Lord will see me through."

After a while the levee breaks, and the flood rushes over the church until only the steeple remains above water. The preacher is up there, clinging to the cross, when a helicopter descends out of the clouds, and a state trooper calls down to him through a megaphone.

"Grab the ladder, Preacher. This is your last chance."

Once again, the preacher insists the Lord will deliver him.

And, predictably, he drowns.

A pious man, the preacher goes to heaven. After a while he gets an interview with God, and he asks the Almighty, "Lord, I had unwavering faith in you. Why didn't you deliver me from that flood?"

God shakes his head. "What did you want from me? I sent you two boats and a helicopter."

Old, but true!

February 14, 2018, 11:33 AM

OKCGene

Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic?

He kept wondering if there really was a dog.

February 14, 2018, 01:37 PM

tk13

quote:
Originally posted by OKCGene:
Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic?

He kept wondering if there really was a dog.

Well, the insomniac dyslexic agnostic sat up all night wondering if there was a dog.

February 14, 2018, 01:41 PM

GT-40DOC

quote:
Originally posted by JALLEN:
She hurried to the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys inside.

The woman found an old rusty coat hanger left on the ground. She looked at it and said,
"I don't know how to use this." She bowed her head and asked God to send her some HELP.

Within 5 minutes a beat-up old motorcycle pulled up, driven by a bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag. He got off of his cycle and asked if he could help.

She said: "Yes, my daughter is sick. I've locked my keys in my car.

I must get home. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?"

He said, “Sure.”

He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car was open.

She hugged the man and through tears said, "Thank You, God, for sending me such a very nice man."

The man heard her little prayer and replied, "Lady, I am NOT a nice man. I just got out of prison yesterday; I was in prison for car theft."

The woman hugged the man again, sobbing, "Oh, thank you, God! You even sent me a Professional!"

Is GOD Great or What?

I needed a smile and chuckle today.....thanx!!

February 14, 2018, 03:10 PM

low8option

Reminds me of the time back in the 60s when I was in college and my wife worked nights as a desk clerk in a motel. She got off at midnight and I always went over to walk her home after her shift. One night a man came in who had locked his keys in his car. Like a good neighbor I went out and got his door open in a few seconds. Next night the local Highway Patrolman comes in and wants to know how I learned to open cars so fast

, the man was his brother. He was just jerking my chain and thanked me for helping.