So Mrs Cockatoo was looking through all the free stuff on Craigslist and came across this ad for Free Goats!

Muslim's love goat meat.
A farmer friend even rented land to raise goats for the market in Loudoun County.

I have thought about getting goats at one time but I realized that you have to build a fence that will hold water to keep them up.

quote:

Originally posted by JWF:
...you have to build a fence that will hold water to keep them up.

Say what?

quote:

Originally posted by parabellum:

quote:

Originally posted by JWF:
...you have to build a fence that will hold water to keep them up.

Say what?

Goats are escape artists.

They're the Swiss Army Knife of yer various and sundry barnyard critters.

Its a fake ad parody of the original "best of craigslist" ad from 2013.
https://www.craigslist.org/abo.../tal/3860772679.html

A workmate of mine has goats. He calls them high maintenance assholes. No fence is strong enough to keep them penned...

So, the cars are OK?

quote:

Originally posted by Nismo:
Its a fake ad parody of the original "best of craigslist" ad from 2013.
https://www.craigslist.org/abo.../tal/3860772679.html

Here’s the actual ad
https://nwga.craigslist.org/zi...help/7543037102.html

This thread made me have a flashback.
I was 15 years old at the time. I was at my cousin's house helping them unload groceries from the back of a Plymouth Fury. The neighbor's goat decided to drop by and get in the trunk of the car. The little bastard stood up on his hind legs and shot a narrow stream of piss straight at me from 3 or 4 yards away. I tried to dodge it but was unsuccessful. My cousin fell to the ground laughing for 30 minutes. I've hated the bastards ever since.

Out in Seattle there are a couple of operations that rent goats. Blackberries are an invasive plant and quickly take over the land. The operator puts up a construction fence but the critters usually focus on the berries

https://www.goskagit.com/news/...f1-b4fb7feda7f2.html

I've got goats and they are incredibly easy keepers in terms of domestic animals. And actually with decent personalities as well. Of course I don't have hundreds of them in commercial production but 5 isn't a big project.

Been there...

When I first moved back to Maine in 1988, I had about two acres of brush so thick you couldn't drive a rabbit through it with a cattle prod. Mostly alders, but also a healthy dose of multiflora rose, raspberry canes and various bad actors of that sort. I had just started keeping sheep and wanted that area cleared for extra pasture.

I made two mistakes: 1) I bought a pair of goats, and; B) I bought pygmy goats. You just THINK full-sized goats are escape artists. Pygmy goats make Houdini look like a rank amateur. Little bastards have GOT to have hinged ribs, no other way they could get through the holes these little shitheels did. Hairy little pricks got into the coop through the chicken door and ate all the feed!

When they got through the fence and trashed the neighbor's garden I knew it was time to get them gone. Feller I knew said he'd take them, but wanted to be sure it was okay with me that he was gonna barbeque them.

"Okay with me? Hand me the spit and I'll shove it up their asses RIGHT NOW!"

I had goats for a bit.
Best way to clear out blackberry bushes.

Had them tied to 75lb tractor counter weights with steel cable.
Stacked 55 gallon barrels 2 high next to the patches and they ate them from the top down.
Just move the barrels and weights around and they pretty much eat the area down to bare dirt.

Beats the shit out of cutting that stuff down, dragging it around and trying to get it in the burn pile.

Goat War Story:
I was sent Code 3 to a residence on an "Unknown Problem" with dispatch listening to people screaming over an open 9-1-1 line. When I arrived, a family was standing outside in the yard in obvious distress. They told me a "large animal" had crashed through their glass patio door and was now destroying their home. I suspected a Whitetail deer, since they are known to see their reflection in glass and head butt what they think is another deer. I cautiously entered the house and found the den / family room and dining room thoroughly trashed. I began a search, knowing a Whitetail in a confined area could kick my ass. And I wondered how the family (and my bosses) would react to me plinking Bambi in the house. Peeking into a bedroom, I was amazed to see the biggest goat I had ever seen standing calmly in the room. He was 5 feet tall and must have weighed 150 pounds. I went back outside, got a length of rope from my car and fashioned a loop. When I approached Billy with my lasso, I expected a battle. But he cooperated and let me lead him outside and tie him to a tree. Problem solved, right? Wait for it... I then called one of our most useless county agencies - Animal Control - and asked them to come and get the goat. They said "we dont do goats" and then pawned me off on several other animal rescue types, all of whom said "we dont do goats". Fine! I called the Animal Control bureaucrat back and told him he had 30 minutes to come and get Billy or I was going to shoot the goat and tell the news media that I did so because they refused to respond. 20 minutes later, a county truck arrived. Problem solved? Wait for it.... Ever try to get a large powerful goat into an open stake bed truck? Try it! Once we could get him up into the truck, Billy would leap back out, easily clearing the stake sides. It took 2 Animal Control types, 3 cops and one of the residents to finally secure him in the truck! And the final chapter of the goat saga? Animal Control managed to get a local farmer to take in Billy. About a month later, the farmer sent the PD a bill for his room and board! I found myself in the Chiefs office trying to explain the whole thing. I learned one thing from all this: No more goats, thank you!

quote:

Originally posted by hrcjon:
I've got goats and they are incredibly easy keepers in terms of domestic animals. And actually with decent personalities as well. Of course I don't have hundreds of them in commercial production but 5 isn't a big project.

Agree. We have three; a Nubian (over 200# easy), a Nigerian Dwarf and a fainting goat. Entertaining as hell and the electric fence keeps ‘em home

Yeah, well, the long suffering residents of Strasbourg finally reached their limit a while ago.

They found a solution.

If you think climbing on cars is bad, wait until you see what Billy Earl climbs.

NSFW

A deputy from a small town close by once answered a call from a country lady complaining about an escaped goat eating her flowers. The deputy then "arrested" the goat and hauled him into to town (in back of the police car) and asked the mayor what should he do with the goat. The mayor suggested he take him "way out of town" and pretend that the goat escaped custody.

To this day, twenty years have past and the goat still remains a fugitive from justice!

(True story!)