|Do No Harm,|
Do Know Harm
I can’t begin to tell you how many times I’ve had things I needed resolved after 4pm on a Friday, or after 4 on a Thursday for the weeks they close their offices here to “catch up” officially. Their constant turnover and rumored toxic work environment I’m sure doesn’t help.
Usually these are things that have real impacts on my employees and the city, for example a night shifter that is cleared back to duty medically during the day, but GD HR is too chickenshit to answer the phone or process the emails, so the poor officer has to burn 30+ hours of sick time that they accumulate at a rate of about a day every 2 months. And their coworkers are forced to work short in an already short job. And you can’t even imagine the absolutely mind blowing workers comp nightmares I hear about weekly.
Every division in the city has on-call personnel to handle stuff after-hours, EXCEPT HR.
But holy shit, how dare we mere peons not do precisely what HR demands.
Most recent WTF, there was a mandatory “vaccination survey”, but no way for managers to verify their employees had done them. Our span-of-control is unmanageable, I’ve got 10-30+ people depending on the time of day, with no assistant. Some people I may not see for days or weeks. Same situation is mirrored across our agency, though I think I’m better staffed than any of the others presently. So no way for me to see who had and had not done their survey.
Anyway, yesterday HR starts shooting out reprimands to everyone that had failed to do their survey. The sheer audacity of a group of collectively worthless people having absolute power and no accountability in infuriating. I believe the next time they fail to respond to a time-sensitive issue that impacts one of my people I will issue them a person write-up in the damn system and deal with the fall out. I don’t give a shit if I get my ass chewed.
Knowing what one is talking about is widely admired but not strictly required here.
Although sometimes distracting, there is often a certain entertainment value to this easy standard.
"All I need is a WAR ON DRUGS reference and I got myself a police thread BINGO." -jljones
|Hop head |
HR's job is to simply find stuff to make more and more HR jobs necessary,
|I Deal In Lead|
I once applied for an in house promotion to Chief Engineer of an R&D section.
HR insisted on interviewing me for the position and I couldn't understand why.
Anyway, the HR lady and I shot the breeze in the cafeteria and talked about hobbies and politics as she knew absolutely nothing about Electronics, and that's what the position was.
Just justifying their existence.
HR departments are nothing but obstructionists.
"Attack life, it's going to kill you anyway." Steve McQueen...
from the abyss
I preferred it when they were known as "Personnel", and simply kept files of applications and such.
Gotta give them credit, though. They have bullshitted enough people into believing they are a necessary specialty. Now they can require degrees and, of course, higher salaries.
"How dreadful are the curses which Mohammedanism lays on its votaries! Besides the fanatical frenzy, which is as dangerous in a man as hydrophobia in a dog, there is this fearful fatalistic apathy." Winston Churchill
Peeps in my circle say, "it's all about the R, not about the H."
God bless America.
I guess I've always been lucky. The prison system folks were fantastic, even manned officers posts in a pinch, and took care of all HR functions in a timely manner. They'd even remind us of upcoming deadlines, like weapons cert. The security company had very simple policies, and I administered HR for my own department. My current position is in a company so small, all HR needs can be met while you wait.
Sorry to hear yours is such a cluster.
I spent most of my career in large corporations. The transformation from the largely ignored Personnel department to the loathed but feared HR department was something to behold.
“Socialism in general has a record of failure so blatant that only an intellectual could ignore or evade it.” ― Thomas Sowell
| Get my pies|
outta the oven!
HR exists for HR and nothing more. The most useless entity and obstruction to getting anything done. There was a reason Michael Scott loathed Toby on The Office, he was useless.
|Ice age heat wave, |
I've had two corporate type jobs and in both of them it was obvious HR existed simply to prove the worth of HR. It may be the biggest ruse in the history of corporate America. Maybe it's different in other companies.
Now that I'm a contractor and work for several businesses, I occasionally deal with their HR departments. One in particular seems to have taken a disliking to my invoicing or how much I charge for certain things. No one else in the company, LITERALLY NO ONE, including the owner, give two fucks, but this cock holster loves to kick up dust and attempt to dissect my pricing.
Of course, the beauty of being a contractor and dealing with someone well outside their boundaries is I quite simply ignore them or tell them no.
NRA Life Member
Steak: Rare. Coffee: Black. Scotch: Neat.
Wasn't HR called Personnel.....
Above, and they are the spies for upper mgmt in many companies. They will act like your friend but record every potentially impolitic thing so you say or do.
It's like my brain's a tree and you're those little cookie elves.
In most if not all companies HR doesnt handle invoicing, accounting does and HR likley doesnt have the authority to approve or disallow invoices.
Can you just tell them to stay in their fucking lane?
It's like my brain's a tree and you're those little cookie elves.
|Drill Here, Drill Now|
HR is two lies in one job title as they're neither human nor a resource. 95% of the ones I've worked with were too lazy and incompetent to work at TSA so they wound up in HR. The last good one I worked with retired Jan 2020.
From the when you think it cannot get worse files, my buddies are telling me that outsourced to 3rd world country HR is even worse HR never fails at finding a way to make it worse.
Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity
DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer.
We can’t even call them directly. You have to fill out a form. It’s just a website/gui where you type up your concern. Mine was them, all of a sudden, sending us all back into the office, now. I mean we’ve been WFH since April of 2020. Right now, in my area, the Delta is going like wildfire. No pediatric ICU beds are available, they are full. Kids are going back to school, and getting sick. Teacher gets sick, then she gives it to her family. It’s expected to be the busiest at the hospitals during the entire pandemic. So I send a response to HR about all this. How foolish it all is. Then I disclosed that I was vaccinated and still contracted the Delta variant which put me on my ass. Oh and why do we not have a quarantine/covid policy? Many places do. You get the virus, with a confirmed test, then you get to quarantine at home, no work and you get paid, and it’s not taken away from your PTO/vacation/sick time. I said I had “real concerns” about returning to the office right in the middle of all of this when it’s not necessary. And told them they could verify my “quality” of employments via my reviews or contact my management. I’ve been killing it all year, and last year, working my ass off while others surf Netflix series.
You know what I got from a response from them? Nothing. Zero. Then they had the balls to send out a survey. Fucking hacks, worthless pieces of trash.
Now you report to this line, Cookie!
Humps. They're humps, not nitwits. OK, maybe both.
Any cocktail can be a shrimp cocktail if you put your mind to it, and if you carry lots of loose shrimp in your pocket.
הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
|Distinguished Pistol Shot|
HR is only there to protect the company. Not to help you.
|Little ray |
HR is generally a department full of small-minded, rules-obsessed bureaucrats. I suppose they do a needed function, but they usually find the worst and least efficient way to do it.
The fish is mute, expressionless. The fish doesn't think because the fish knows everything.
|Unapologetic Old |
Im not even sure about that... they are there to protect HR, and entrench HR further like a virus.
Don't weep for the stupid, or you will be crying all day
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