Just like in the cartoons, and I have the red dot idiot mark off-centered on my forehead to commemorate the event.

Funny, I can't even remember the last time I did this.

Have you done anything classically, cliche, stereotypically dumb-ass recently?

Well, you were around tools and your intentions were probably good so there's that.

In first grade, one of those large pencils issued to kids to learn to write with began to roll off my desk. I instinctively closed my legs to catch it. The point stabbed into my leg and broke off. I carried the lead around in my leg for decades. Not quite the comedic situation of a stepped on rake but its close!

I could fill up three evenings of fire side chats
With shit for brains stunts, three stooges
Accidents and cartoon skits that
I have been lucky to survive.

I don’t like a rake laying with the tines upward. It needs to be turned over or leaning against something.

quote:

Originally posted by sourdough44:

It needs to be turned over or leaning against something.

Most of all the tines should be inward with a leaning rake. An upright handle comes at you a lot faster, so I've been told.

quote:

Originally posted by RichardC:
Have you done anything classically, cliche, stereotypically dumb-ass recently?

Youngest son didn’t have school on Monday, so naturally we went fishing. If you have already guessed we launched the boat without putting the plug in, you would be correct. Fortunately it’s a small boat with a tiller outboard and I caught it early. Popped the plug in, kept idling out, got on plane, pulled the plug out, showed my son how the water drains out while you are on plane, then popped the plug back in.

quote:

Originally posted by sourdough44:
I don’t like a rake laying with the tines upward. It needs to be turned over or leaning against something.

Agreed. I should always wear gloves when working outside, on cars, when using sharp objects and anywhere near anything abrasive.

Sadly though I know all the "shoulds" and safe methods of using anything, I have 70 years of scars on my body. Minor scars but scars nonetheless. My shining moment was using one of those corkscrews that screw into the cork then you push two levers and extract the cork. Simple right? The cork was a bit long and I pulled the corkscrew that resisted then came loose into my chin. 3 stiches. I now use a waiters corkscrew, more efficient and safer.
I am much better about safety but there is sometimes a momentary lapse or reason.

I was trying to cut the shrink wrap off the top of a glass bottle of BBQ sauce one time with a big chef knife, and basically sabered the entire top of the bottle right off, bits of glass and BBQ sauce flying everywhere. SMDH

Just like this, but with BBQ sauce instead of champagne and it splattered and flew everywhere:

quote:

Originally posted by sourdough44:
It needs to be turned over or leaning against something.

It were!.Tines down.and leaning up against the wagon.
I'm no underachiever.

I've done far worse. I once told a woman yes, that dress did make her but look big. I would have preferred a bruise.

I once tried to figure out how many stitches I had earned at one point. I got to a hundred and quit. Life experiences.

Like bendable, I could regale you with hours of stupidity. In my 20's I was helping a local rancher friend bale hay. Did it the "old fashioned" way. Standing on a wood sled behind the bailor while he drove the tractor. Anyway I was using bailing hooks to grab the square bails coming off the tray & stacking them on the sled behind me.
I went to hook a bail (underhand), missed & hit myself dead center in the forehead with the pointed hook. As I lay in the field on my back watching the sled pull away from me I realized, through the stars I was seeing & the blood running down my face I had to get up & run back onto the sled because Bob couldn't hear me yelling & the bails just kept coming. One instance of many incidents from my youth.

13 trips to the ER before my 13th birthday. Yeah, I’ve had a few Homer Simpson moments.
The funniest was probably freshman or sophomore year of HS. I’m hauling ass down the hallway trying to beat the bell to class. I turn left down the industrial arts hallway and another kid was hauling ass from that hallway hanging a right onto the main. We met at the intersection both tried to avoid a collision and we did a pretty good job except for our arms. Nobody called foul so we kept running until I realized I dropped my pencil so I hit the brakes. The other kid realized there was a pencil sticking out of his arm and he hit the brakes. He pulled the pencil out and said here you go man! He said I’m all good so we just kept trucking along. To this day I haven’t a clue who that kid is.

The other standout was my crazy buddy Brian and I were doing dive rolls over a sizable bonfire one evening. It was a blast until we met head on over the fire. The flames were high enough we couldn’t see each other. We both landed in the fire and sort of bounced out unscathed except for the headaches. The rest of the evening was pretty rare, two hyperactive kids who were relatively mellow for a night.

Was cutting up a downed tree for firewood this summer with a buddy. We were clearing up the brushy part at the top, and he was on one side of the tree with his saw and I was on the other. Normally, I like to stand inside of the branches when I cut them so they fling away from me when they unload, but I didn't want to get too close to him and his saw so I was working from the outside. Would have been fine if I'd kept working from the top down, but my dumbass somehow worked my way down and cut from closer to the base of the tree...and managed to smack myself right in the face with a 3" limb when I cut through it. Thankfully it didn't knock me out and I didn't loose any teeth or eyes, but it split my cheek wide open and made a bloody mess. My wife was on a trip overseas at the time and wasn't too sympathetic when I sent her a picture, lol.

I needed a grommet to run a wire harness thru the firewall on a project car. Found a body plug the right size and was cutting the center out with a very sharp utility knife. As I cut around so the knife blade was headed back towards me, the thought flashed thru my mind that it was really dumb to have the blade pointed at one of my appendages. Yup, that was the exact moment the blade slipped and drove into my thumb, nearly to the bone. I don't recall how many stitches it took to close that wound, but it was a lot.

Never did it with a rake but did do it with a pickaxe laying on its side once. Guess where a 36-inch handle hits you.

The same spot a chain hits you when you weave it back and fro, carry it on your shoulder, and toss it on a sawhorse to set it down.

I’m guessing.

About 20 years old. Swingset that has the rubber strap seats. Lay your chest on it and spin around to twist the chains and let go. I'm spinning clockwise, my buddy next to me going counter clockwise. Perfect head shot, I swear I saw stars!

quote:

Originally posted by RichardC:

Yes. I stepped on a garden rake. Just like in the cartoons

Waiting for pictures.