its place!

Does the male gender, specifically afflicted with the husband condition, emotionally decay over time to where having things strewn about the home in apparently random locations creates a stress response?

I cannot at present determine why items of a similar nature (i.e. receipts) have locations of (a)the dining room table (b)the kitchen table (c)the top of the dresser (d)the office desk (e)the front entry table (f)the kitchen counter next to the refrigerator (g)the car and (h)the purse. And, after existing in carefully organized places like this, to be tossed in the wastebucket after being logged into Quicken.

How does a husband best handle dissimilar operating principles and procedures? Do I need to throw away my military standard attitude along with the manual?

And, yes, I am aware that my persona has similar tendencies, for other items.

Well, my much better half constantly moves all the designated spots for such items at random times neccesatating what is effectively an Easter egg hunt at least once a week just before I leave for work.

My lovely bride cannot figure out why kitchen utensils have their own drawer based on what the utensil does, nor can she understand the part where salad and dinner forks are separated (and the teaspoons/ table spoons )

if i ever get a divorce it will be because she is a complete slob when it comes to keeping things neat and orderly. A wonderful mother, excellent cook, but a fucking disaster when it comes to keeping house. It will be the death of me. I'm 16 years in.

Many years ago a GF volunteered to clean my apartment each week and arrange things in a sensible order.

That idea lasted three weeks. I told her to stop, I couldn't find anything.

Binge watch the Odd Couple. Two guys same problem. An apartment manager told me that you look carefully at the prospective tenant's car, it will reflect how they keep their apartment.

Some women I know are extremely compulsive in their behavior. It is a personality thing.

My girlfriend went on a five day trip recently. It was the first time in four years my house has been clean for five days in a row. She doesn't seem to understand dishes go in sink or dishwasher, and trash goes in trashcan. I don't get it.

Stick to it I say. I'm the same way but I've been divorced for 6 years.
I had things in my house in a certain place when I was married and that's where they were. Her things were put where she wanted them, usually all over the place.
Now it's just me and my 17 year old daughter. Her room is a disaster area and she loses things all the time. The rest of the house is mine and everything is in order.

 
Wife and I do things completely differently, house-wise. I don't try to figure out her "methods", and vice versa. I keep my own kitchen drawer with the utensils and paper plates I need, wash them myself, and never have to want for what I need to eat. If I let it go into the "system" (dishwasher, etc), I might not see it again for days. She uses the dishwasher as a repository for dirty dishes, and when it's full, she runs it, and it might be a day or so before it's emptied. She has plenty of dishes to deal with that. I can't wait that long for simple utensils. For me, one knife, one fork, one spoon, one bowl, and I'm happy.
 

My wife and daughter are disasters when it comes to organization and it stresses me out. Retired now I have time to clean up the place but am not getting any cooperation. So I am doing it a bit at a time and I am to the point I really don't care if it pisses her off anymore because she insists I don't touch her "stuff" but 95 percent of it is junk including old magazines, old mail, old clothes/shoes, old towels/linens, unused gifts, print outs from work meetings, no longer used products, etc. I already get blamed for when she can not find something as in I must have thrown it out. My response is "go buy another one" which she never does. I hate the "piles" everywhere. She simply can not throw anything out on her own. I have done some research on the issue and it looks like it is rare to get such people to change and they have an emotional/sentimental attachment to their stuff no matter how worthless it seems to be to others.

My wife is certainly not lazy or dumb and has an advanced degree in medical field but work has a structure where there are strict procedures to follow unlike at home.

My attitude is mostly if the house burned down with everything in it would I go out and buy this item again?

quote:

Originally posted by 4MUL8R:
How does a husband best handle dissimilar operating principles and procedures? Do I need to throw away my military standard attitude along with the manual?

Yes, thrown all that away or keep them in the man cave or garage and save them for if and when you have male children.

When my wife and daughter go on trips the very first thing I do I clean up after them. I dont mean just the kitchen and bathrooms, I mean everything including dumping contents of entire drawers to weed out the garbage that gets stuffed in them because they are too lazy to deal with it.

When they come home the house is spotless and it usually stays that way for a matter of hours.