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To my fellow cyclists I encountered on the trail today... Login/Join 
Objectively Reasonable
Picture of DennisM
posted
A quick bit of Ride Intel for you, since it seems that your wankspangle “ride leader” forgot to include it in his pre-ride safety talk this morning: You’re not actually IN the Tour de France or the Race Across America. I am certain on this point because neither route traverses Pennsylvania or the Delaware and Lehigh Canal towpath. That being the case, there’s no reason for the eight of you to ride in a pseudo-Peloton-style line, trying to take advantage of the drafting effect that doesn’t exist when you are a) moving at around 10mph, riding b) your brand-new carbon road bikes with 25mm tires c) on packed gravel. Because you’re not racing. You’re on a fucking trail that’s used by cyclists, walkers, runners, and horses, in BOTH DIRECTIONS, and you’re managing to monopolize the entire width of the trail.

So, ordinarily, I wouldn’t give two shits about how you ride, where you ride, or how you look while riding, but I make an exception in this case because you forced me to choose between going into the drink or coming to a VERY sudden stop on the path to avoid taking you out. Trivia note: I outweigh you by a good fifty pounds and I’m riding steel that’s older than you are, and it would’ve been painful and inconvenient for you if I’d considered the THIRD option of just riding into you head-on.

Insult to injury was the vacant cow look Wankspangle Leader gave me—with a bleating “Whatdya mean?”—when I asked him if he’d made a deal with the state to rent the whole fucking path for the day. How did I know he was the “ride leader?” It was the silkscreened “RIDE LEADER” on the club jersey that solved that riddle, and gave me simultaneously a group AND an individual to hate.

It makes me want to pass you at the first opportunity and shove each of you into the actual Delaware River as I pass, and then throw things at you when you try to swim to shore. Also, it makes me want to find the person who sold you—probably in the past month—your $2000 race machines and $500 worth of Lycra (all of which advertise Italian companies whose products you likely can’t actually identify) and kick him square in the balls. Thanks for freakin’ nothing, morons. This is why motorists already hate you, and it makes it REALLY hard for me to blame them.

That is all.
 
Posts: 2550 | Registered: January 01, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Still finding my way
Picture of Ryanp225
posted Hide Post
Better yet is when I'm driving my truck up a twisty mountain road that has a 35-45 mph speed limit and come around a blind corner to encounter these ass goblins doing barely 5 mph in the middle of the frikin road.
If they at least displayed common courtesy or basic human decency people wouldn't hate them so much.
A pox on mankind they are.
 
Posts: 10851 | Registered: January 04, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of Pistolria
posted Hide Post
That is honestly one of the best rants I have ever seen! And spot on too.
 
Posts: 676 | Location: Jacksonville Beach, FL | Registered: July 24, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Only the strong survive
Picture of 41
posted Hide Post
We have them in Loudoun County at times with two abreast. Some drop back to single file and let you by.


41
 
Posts: 11894 | Location: Herndon, VA | Registered: June 11, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
No, not like
Bill Clinton
Picture of BigSwede
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Pistolria:
That is honestly one of the best rants I have ever seen! And spot on too.


2nd



 
Posts: 5666 | Location: GA | Registered: September 23, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
The Unmanned Writer
Picture of LS1 GTO
posted Hide Post
Wait till you come to other parts of the country where there are signs which read, "Cyclist May Use Full Lane" and ONE fricking bike does just that. Wink






Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.



"If dogs don't go to Heaven, I want to go where they go" Will Rogers

The definition of the words we used, carry a meaning of their own...



 
Posts: 14205 | Location: It was Lat: 33.xxxx Lon: 44.xxxx now it's CA :( | Registered: March 22, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
Excellent rant, and the term "wankspangle" made me laugh.

The county to my south spent a fortune putting bike trails in everywhere, paved and dirt. Assholes come up here instead, to take up the entire lane of county highways with loads of blind curves. Only a matter of time before one of them gets turned into a greasy spot.

They ride in single file, until a car gets close, then spread out across the entire lane. I guess to prevent passing?
 
Posts: 369 | Location: Southwest Missouri  | Registered: April 08, 2020Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
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Lots of bike paths locally here too but I see all kinds of pedalers on our county roads, keeping company with logging, mining and other tandem semi rigs.
That has to make for an exciting ride!


End of Earth: 2 Miles
Upper Peninsula: 4 Miles
 
Posts: 16468 | Location: Marquette MI | Registered: July 08, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
A Grateful American
Picture of sigmonkey
posted Hide Post
For the many years and millions of miles I have driven, I cannot get bent out of shape on cyclist.

It is not that much effort to dodge them, pass them with plenty of berth and far enough behind and in front of them.

Because a hazard they may need to dodge is likely too small for me to see and I rather not squash them.

Out of all I have encountered, a very few of them have been out of bounds in their operation on the roadways.

Now, the people on bikes that are on bikes because there DUI card is a winning coverall BINGO, another story. Riding on the right sidewalk going "leftbound" is really foolish and I have almost bagged a couple more times than I can recall.

Often hidden and that "last glance to my left" as I pull out, and up pops the weasel.

If they come from my left, I have less trouble with them, and can often see them and wait for them to amble by.




"the meaning of life, is to give life meaning" Ani Yehudi אני יהודי Le'olam lo shuv לעולם לא שוב!
 
Posts: 44578 | Location: ...... I am thrice divorced, and I live in a van DOWN BY THE RIVER!!! (in Arkansas) | Registered: December 20, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
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Sounds like a clown show. No serious cyclists with any decency or self respect would ever ride a pace line on a MUP.
 
Posts: 2540 | Location: WI | Registered: December 29, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Non-Miscreant
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quote:
Originally posted by bigwagon:
Sounds like a clown show. No serious cyclists with any decency or self respect would ever ride a pace line on a MUP.


So where do we find them with decency?


Unhappy ammo seeker
 
Posts: 18394 | Location: Kentucky, USA | Registered: February 25, 2001Reply With QuoteReport This Post
No ethanol!
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Drivers, golfers, boaters, all have selfish +/or oblivious types. Even we gun owners have our fair share. Spent a career in cycling, and never considered cycling enthusiasts to be any better or worse than other groups. Yahoos do not get a pass when they share a sport or interest, they're still rude, or worse.


------------------
The plural of anecdote is not data. -Frank Kotsonis
 
Posts: 2102 | Location: Berks Co PA | Registered: December 20, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Rumors of my death
are greatly exaggerated
Picture of coloradohunter44
posted Hide Post
Theirs a plague of them that infest Boulder county down to the south. One of them got taken outta the gene pool recently. Now they are complaining to the county to widen the roads, etc. why not just avoid the dangerous roads. I understand trying to live healthy..etc. But at what expense?



"Someday I hope to be half the man my bird-dog thinks I am."

FBLM LGB!
 
Posts: 11029 | Location: Commirado | Registered: July 23, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Non-Miscreant
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by coloradohunter44:
Now they are complaining to the county to widen the roads,


I agree with them. The only problem is expense. That could easily be solved just by licensing them. Maybe $300 per year. Time to end their free ride.


Unhappy ammo seeker
 
Posts: 18394 | Location: Kentucky, USA | Registered: February 25, 2001Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by bigwagon:
Sounds like a clown show. No serious cyclists with any decency or self respect would ever ride a pace line on a MUP.


Or sport a jersey that says ‘ride leader’.
 
Posts: 516 | Location: Michigan | Registered: May 18, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
אַרְיֵה
Picture of V-Tail
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by bigwagon:

MUP
Confused



הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
 
Posts: 31599 | Location: Central Florida, Orlando area | Registered: January 03, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
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We reside adjacent to a state park. Cyclists are an everyday occurrence. The prevalent attitude of cyclists is that they own the road.
 
Posts: 997 | Registered: October 09, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Misanthropic Philanthrope
Picture of MWC
posted Hide Post
I have come to hate all bicyclists. We have a "bike path" that runs through town that is used by runners and walkers too. The runners and walkers are most likely to be on the right edge on the path in the direction of travel; inevitably, all the assclown bicyclists feel compelled to ride up behind and yell, "on your left!" So now when I'm driving and encounter bicyclists, I feel compelled to hit my horn and yell out the window "on your left!" Big Grin


___________________________
Originally posted by Psychobastard:
Well, we "gave them democracy"... not unlike giving a monkey a loaded gun.

 
Posts: 6788 | Registered: June 14, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
I Am The Walrus
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by V-Tail:
quote:
Originally posted by bigwagon:

MUP
Confused


Muppet.


_____________

 
Posts: 13344 | Registered: March 12, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
The air above the din
Picture of Aquilon
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by MWC:
I have come to hate all bicyclists. We have a "bike path" that runs through town that is used by runners and walkers too. The runners and walkers are most likely to be on the right edge on the path in the direction of travel; inevitably, all the assclown bicyclists feel compelled to ride up behind and yell, "on your left!" So now when I'm driving and encounter bicyclists, I feel compelled to hit my horn and yell out the window "on your left!"


Huh. That's the opposite of my experience. When I'm on a bike, I encounter plenty of runners and walkers in groups of 2 or more, spread out across the entire path. Inevitably, walkers and runners are either talking amongst themselves, staring at a phone, or wearing headphones - entirely oblivious to their surroundings and the crazy possibly that other people may be using the trails too. So that "on your left" is usually my (polite) way of saying pay attention, get out of the way, and stop taking up the entire trail width. It may sound rude, because it usually has to be shouted multiple times at increasing volumes due to that total unawareness thing. For the solo walker/runner on a narrow path, it's also a courtesy, in case you decide to step out into my path. Guarantee that will hurt the oblivious pedestrian more than me.

What is mind-numbingly astounding is that this happens as I am approaching walkers and runners from the FRONT nearly as often as approaching from behind. I have had to ride off the side of a path on more than one occasion when I get within 10-20' of a group of pedestrians, from the front (!!!), who never saw me until the last second.

Now, that said, as a mountain biker, I completely share everyone's disdain for the road/gravel bikers. If I'm on pavement, it's only out of necessity to get from one dirt path to another. Wink

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Aquilon,
 
Posts: 967 | Location: Virginia | Registered: May 16, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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