One approach might be to inquire of your mother-in-law her expectations of guests for Easter. If she knows that grandkids are not coming, she might then share her disappointment or her understanding with you. As a good listener, you could judge if you could support her in some way. She might need a hug or maybe a trip to Starbucks for a good coffee. I would only agree with her assessment in general terms. "It is sad, Mom, that they won't be able to come." Offering any criticism of anyone to her shows your righteous anger, but also could change your relationship.

quote:

Originally posted by bendable:
Meanwhile the muslim lady is all the while thinking to herself,
Shit !
there is no way I thought she'd come here if I made the party on easter oh well

Bahahahahhahaa!!

Winner winner!!!!

I cannot abide those who are discourteous of other's religion. It's not hard to simply be polite. As far as I know, participating in an Easter egg hunt or attending a Sunday dinner never put anyone's soul at risk, but I could be wrong.

quote:

Originally posted by Ronin1069:
My MIL is an amazingly sweet woman and for the past 20 years I have watched 2 of her 3 children treat her as nothing but a distraction . She deserves better.

This might be a hint as a pattern of behavior usually has a common cause... You reap what you sow

Send her a Hallmark© Happy Dhimmi Day card.

quote:

Originally posted by OMCHamlin:
Well, I don't want to be contrary, I agree wholeheartedly with you, that is a shit move on SIL's part.
No, your divorce from that family can NOT come soon enough...

I am stuck with two ULTRA liberal sisters, ex-hippies from the 60's era. They are blood and unfortunately, I can't divorce them, blood being blood and all. I try not to have much to do with them and succeed fairly well, but the oldest one is threatening to come down for a visit for a couple of days. Maybe I can lure her out into tick country again...

Were I in your situation I would tell them that their visit is not convenient at this time.

If they ask for a more convenient time, tell them you will let them know.

Of course, I am 81 years old, and have damned little patience with such people. Only have 1 brother who is 10 years younger, left alive and that is not a real warm relationship. Of course the fact that he is some 3000 miles to the NW has something to do with it.

What will happen when she invites the Muslim kids over for HER kid's birthday, and it falls on a muslim holiday?

You guys are slipping. I thought it was MOOOSlim, or at least it was when ppl would allcaps HUSSEIN!

You refer, of course, to B. 'Sweetest Sound in the World' HUSSEIN 'sorry about the Easter Worshipers' Obama ?

quote:

Originally posted by Ronin1069:
Update

Now that I have had an evening to sleep on this, for me it comes down to respect.

My SIL is choosing to let her kids go to this party because:

1. She wants everyone to know how ‘okay’ she is with the birthday party being Easter Sunday.

2. She is an atheist, as is her husband, and sadly it is how they are raising their young children.

3. She (because of the influence of her husband) has increasingly mocked and dismissed her mother’s Catholic faith. This is just one more thing.

4. Her response to my wife’s pressure that she needed to be at Easter was, “I’ve been to every Easter since they were born, she just needs to get over this.”

Respect.

I’m not even mad at the Muslim family, for all I know they invited SIL’s kids because they know they do not consider themselves Christian.

My MIL is an amazingly sweet woman and for the past 20 years I have watched 2 of her 3 children treat her as nothing but a distraction. She deserves better.

You don't really know what she's thinking so none of what you think her reasons are are baseless.

But having said that, her behavior of not going to her mother's easter dinner is sufficiently bad by itself.

I spent Easter at my sister's house with all her children, in-laws, and grandchildren. One of the mothers of the spouse in law was there. One couple was just a little late because they stopped at her mother's place.

Driving home 40 miles away afterwards, my wife remarked she never get tired after a visit at my sister's house and her children. We spend a good time laughing at stories about each other. I realize my wife is right. I don't laugh out loud as much as with those people.

But, in any case, your sister in law does suck for not going to her mother's easter dinner.

I've been thinking "meh", there are bigger fish to fry. But then, my mom (and my brothers mom) went into Hospice 4 months back (hospice is semi-defined as having only 6 months to live). My brothers wife's mom is in the same town as my mom and also in a bad way, alone in a home.

My brother and my sister-in-law only live @ 250 miles away and they both just retired. Despite the condition of both of their parents they both decided it would be good to take a month off, travel @2000 miles away where there is no phone service, and do some bird watching. For a full month.

I think about this much too often when my mom needs her bird feeder filled and there is no one else, or she wants some small thing picked up. Kind of gnashes my craw a tad when I consider it. But I can only control myself and my actions on this. So I do my best and what he does is what he does.

gnashe gnashe gnashe. To prove I'm not a good person, if she passes when he's away, I'll not be communicating anything to him. If and when he show up and happens to ask "hows mom" or "where did mom go", I'll just say: "she died a month back and she was cremated, why do you ask?"

quote:

Originally posted by RichardC:
Send her a Hallmark© Happy Dhimmi Day card.

LOL! Bon Mot! All too true as the former President Fascist Fuckface and his pale faced partner in luciferism demonstrated.