Not really a rant as much as sharing a frustration. I’ve shared over the years the issues I’ve had with my alcoholic sister, and how her actions have affected most of her immediate family.

Next year my aunts and uncles and I are all going to take a cruise to Alaska in June. The decision was made to do all of the planning without inviting her. Having her on a cruise ship with unlimited alcohol is probably not the type of vacation any of us are looking for. All of her aunts/uncles have seen her at her chaotic worst.

At some point she is going to find out about it, and she’s going to be hurt/pissed.

Not my problem, but she is still my sister, and regardless of how she has treated me in the past, I am still find myself feeling responsible for her because her husband is completely useless.

The bitch of it is, when it comes out that this cruise is happening. Somehow I will be the one she blames; it was not my trip originally, I was simply invited to go on a long.

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Wish I had some useful, easy letdown type of advice.
I’m in the same sort of boat as you, but on a different type of trip. I haven't said a word as yet, but when it comes to light, I’ll be honest about why no one asked her to come. It hurts to say it, and I always feel badly about it, but..
It’s just too hard on everyone else.

(There have been a couple family trips now where we weren’t able to invite her, so I really do get where you’re coming from). I wish you well.

What sucks about the situation… Is that when she is sober she’s one of the kindest, generous and compassionate people I know.

When she gets the taste of booze… It’s game over though. She’s a complete angry maniac. I could literally envision a scenario where she is completely hammered, and, hanging off a balcony on the side of the ship. No thank you.

She needs to hear the truth . If it has to come from you then so be it . I'm a firm believer in tough love .

I have two sisters, haven’t talked to each other in 6 years or so. It’s over silly stuff, like taking a picture on the phone at a family event.

The one hasn’t talked to me in 10 weeks or so, fine by me.

Is your sister on head meds, like many? If so, those & alcohol are a bad combination.

I may not want a 4 day drive, but I can get along with most anyone. If a relative wants to be mad about something , I don’t care. If needed I’ll block them on the phone, have them stay away.

I would tell her about the trip, it's not your job to invite or exclude her

Let it go Bro

Not your planned trip, not your place to tell her or anyone, I'd wait until she calls you regarding it and you can simply deflect it as it's not your decision on who goes or doesn't...

Today I broke my sister’s hearts by confronting on her on her drinking in a way that likely will irreversibly end our friendship. I can only hope that in future years she will realize that this was her “rock bottom” and reach back out to me. I’ll always be there.

Ronin, you absolutely did the right thing in my opinion. It would be better, of course, if the rest of your family would confront her as well in an organized intervention, with an offer to send her to rehab.