I'm in stew over recent experiences with dating websites. My wife got the big C and passed 3 years back, my options are limited here.

*rant on* At Match..While the site worked, it could be much better. Fake profiles and pros are too common. I had my account hacked twice earlier this year. After the hack, customer service could restore control but none of my past searches or email. After the second hack, the hacker emailed everyone saved or emailed, more or less making my profile suspect to precisely who I was interested in. Could not get customer service to respond to any of my questions on why or how, and didn't give a shit about any time or info lost. No replies for a refund for several remaining months. Match you suck and I'm not going back.

I've since tried another only to cancel after 1 week when the website lacked filters or didn't obey them. Crop uploaded photos? Reject photos which are humor? No body type? Can't search? I could bitch for 2 more paragraphs. Elite Singles, you suck too. You get 1 point back for allowing the cancellation to work as advertised. *rant off*

Sorry to say I'm not eager to try again, but.. .

You try eharmony?

I don't envy you. Best wishes...

Not yet. I was thinking it was next but wanted to know more. Anyone have experience there?

I have a friend who was successful with smaller regional sites. One was called Date a Farmer or something similar. My friend was in Wheeling but would drive to Philly to date.

Match, Plenty of Fish, and OKCupid are a bit more younger / hookup oriented.

EHarmony and Farmers Only and Christian Mingle maybe be more your speed.

That's what she said!

I saw some reviews of OK Cupid, and tried there. They were recently bought by Elite Singles, and I was redirected there to sign up. See first post for poor experience. I was appalled by the fact they own about 5-6 sites like Jdate, Christian Mingles, and others (HQ in Berlin Ger see any irony there?), and IMO still had a poor website. Oh, also learned that Our Time is owned by the Match people too. That site functions worse than Match in most ways, and better in others (like sort by distance).

What is your general age range?

If you are <45 or so, Plenty of Fish could work well. Yeah work to sort through and definitely more of a consenting adults having fun than relationship, but it will at least get you out there.

Otherwise I'd suggest just going to do activities where ever you live - wine tastings, book clubs, workout places, community activities, volunteering at hospitals - and do so not to 'find someone', but just to meet more people - I think you may find the rest comes naturally.

Good luck.

Got to just get out there.

Tried eHarmony after my divorce. I specifically blocked my exwife's age range. It still suggested her saying we matched.

quote:

Originally posted by RHINOWSO:
What is your general age range?

If you are <45 or so, Plenty of Fish could work well. Yeah work to sort through and definitely more of a consenting adults having fun than relationship, but it will at least get you out there.

Otherwise I'd suggest just going to do activities where ever you live - wine tastings, book clubs, workout places, community activities, volunteering at hospitals - and do so not to 'find someone', but just to meet more people - I think you may find the rest comes naturally.

Good luck.

I'm 60+, and a bit young for my age. Looking for long term and something with a bit of spark left in her. Not just looking for someone to iron and owns their own boat.

Have I mentioned women over 50-something are all crazy?

quote:

Originally posted by Chowser:
Tried eHarmony after my divorce. I specifically blocked my exwife's age range. It still suggested her saying we matched.

Well she probably lied about her age on the site so......

quote:

Originally posted by preten2b:

quote:

Originally posted by RHINOWSO:
What is your general age range?

If you are <45 or so, Plenty of Fish could work well. Yeah work to sort through and definitely more of a consenting adults having fun than relationship, but it will at least get you out there.

Otherwise I'd suggest just going to do activities where ever you live - wine tastings, book clubs, workout places, community activities, volunteering at hospitals - and do so not to 'find someone', but just to meet more people - I think you may find the rest comes naturally.

Good luck.

I'm 60+, and a bit young for my age. Looking for long term and something with a bit of spark left in her. Not just looking for someone to iron and owns their own boat.

Have I mentioned women over 50-something are all crazy?

I assure you, they are ALL crazy.

That said, some are less than others. I met my wife on eharmony. Home-freaking-run.

I met my first wife doing "activities that I liked".

It's all a crapshoot.

IMO, You have got to get out and enjoy....

Go to Church service or Church social function.

Go to a self service laundry in a nice neighborhood with upgraded apartments. (seriously)

Get a small dog and take doggie for a long walk. Women love small dogs.

Forget the dating sites. Too many lies and drama Queens.

Talk about self in a constrained way that fits into a neat little box that is not only cookie cutter, but completely square, and ridiculous = your profile.

Now take stupid pics of yourself, and smear them on the internet.

Next, pay the fiddler for their membership fees. At the same time each dating site records all your information, pictures, etc, and sells that information to the highest bidder, marketing companies.

I'd rather run naked, backwards, through a corn field.

quote:

I'm 60+, and a bit young for my age. Looking for long term and something with a bit of spark left in her. Not just looking for someone to iron and owns their own boat.

Please send a picture of the boat!

I tried several dating sites and they all sucked but never wanted to try eHarmony because I had heard it was "hard to setup" and expensive but finally decided to give it a try.

Yes, getting your profile set up was kind of a PITA and took around 2 hours, but within 2-3 weeks I met a really nice girl and we hit it off. Our 5 year marriage anniversary is this October!

eHarmony is the way to go.

eHarmony is where I met my wife.

Met my finance on plenty of fish. I had waded through 10 bad dates or so to meet her. After I was thoroughly disgusted with online dating. I sent her one final message that I was getting off the site and here's my number. It took us a few months before we actually met, but I am sure glad we did.

The dates I went on were all horrible. The two that stood out the worst were:

The bisexual. First date OK, second date I had to call a cab to leave since she drove. We went to her friends party, didn't mention it was 96% Gay people in attendance. I got sick of seeing guys making out and sitting in each others laps. Also, there are VERY FEW attractive lesbians so watching them making out was not fun either.

The always cared for chick. This girl went directly from living with daddy to husband. Never worked a day in her life and was still unemployed when I met her. Her husband had abused her and she shared about every detail possible about that, fun conversation for date #1. I asked her why she didn't just take a server position until she found something. She told me she has a Master's degree, working in a restaurant was beneath her.

I pretended I got a phone call and told her there was an emergency I had to leave. I was only halfway through my entree too which sucked. Paid the check and got out of Dodge. Restaurant was on top floor of building, somehow I got stuck walking to my car with her, her elevator somehow caught up to mine. Then she kept texting me saying she thought I was the one and wanting to go out again. After a few days of not responding to her she then texts me if I wanted to watch a movie and if she could bring over some laundry to wash. I replied, you texted the wrong guy. That finally got her to go away.

I could type a bunch of similar stories like this.

My two favorites to date were:

Chinese girl with insatiable appetite for sex, 10 for a body and a penchant for wearing very short skirts. She was awesome, but had brought her little brother from China and expected me to be his daddy. I did have a LOT of fun for a couple months.

Black French chick. She also had an insatiable appetite. This one only lasted a month, she was straight up broken. Another 10, but she was either a secret agent or habitual liar. I never knew what to make of her, but between her looks and her talking in French while we did it, I tried to stick it out for a little while.

All of this to say, it's a lot of work to wade through the hundreds of girls who you'd go on a date with and the thousands you would not, but there is a few diamonds in the rough. You just need to be willing to invest the time to find one worth going on second and third dates with. There are some good girls mixed in with the sluts, liars, and crazies. Keep working it.

Good luck!

I'm not a fan of online dating. Women get a lot of attention and it goes to their head, especially the younger ones. I find that they're not as willing to compromise because they get dozens of messages a day from a bunch of guys all saying the right thing and feel like unless the guy checks everything on their list comes along, keep dating. Moreover, I've never had a strong texting game and with the 20s and 30s crowd that makes communicating that much harder.

Since then I've been using meetup.com and going to group activities that interest me. I've had much better success there.