My neighbour just phoned me. He taught me reloading and has been into guns since the 50's. War vet in his 80's now I believe.

Super nice, generous guy. Hilarious guy.

Well his health has been bad for years now. He just phoned to say his breathing isn't going well right now and he doesn't think he's going to be around a while. So he asked me to come get all his reloading gear and his ammo.

I am sitting here staring at the wall with a tear in my eyes thinking about how much I fucking hate the fact that people go.

I kept telling him you know doctors, you could hang on forever, but he has COPD and was coughing like I never heard. So I am going by Friday and I feel like shit. I honestly don't even want the gear as I don't have room or reload but I don't want it to go to waste and he wants me to have it all.

I hate the idea of people aging and dying. I honestly never learned how to deal with it.

It sounds like he's made his peace with the end of his life, however much time he has left, and having you take his reloading gear is a burden removed from him. It's good you are there to help him with this, and I'm sure he appreciates your helping him prepare in his own way. I know I would.

Death defines life. Without an end, our lives would go on forever and we, as individuals and as masses, could accomplish anything.

Your friend knows his life is about to be defined. Cry because he's gone, not because of how you feel.

Celebrate because of where he'll be, not because of the physical void he leaves behind.

Look at the material stuff he leaves behind as his "goodbye gift" to the people around him, not for the monetary value it represents.

Sad indeed, and agree you should go, and spend time with him, and be grateful, and oblige his wish please.

^^^
This is the right thing.

Tell him "he matters" to you.

Cry you eyes out if it helps, in private if that helps. Or don't cry at all just grieve. Never forget him and use what he taught you as positive testament to his life and its impact on you.

Thankfully tell him you will hang on to his stuff for him. And you appreciate his friendship.

I wish I had the words others have so eloquently expressed in this thread.
Your heart is in the right place. Go be with him. Cherish his gifts and his friendship.
Be grateful you can tell him while he’s alive how important he is to you and what a worthwhile man you think he is.

It's very sad to see. My next door neighbor is a retired Publix bakery manager. Was type II diabetic, now I believe type I in the past year. He is AWESOME and his wife is very nice. We hang out all of the time, BS, etc. I'd say he's late 70's.......in the past year, he has aged 10 years.....and it's really sad to see....physically the change is very fast.

Take those gifts from your friend .
I am in that place like your friend and my kids have no interest in my hobby
Cherish his offering and give him piece.

Go as soon as you can. Be honored you earned a place in his heart to think of you to leave his reloading equipment behind.

Sorry to hear about your friend.

Agree with the comments above - be honored he wants the items to go to you. Once the pain of losing a friend passes, think about reloading - it's really a great hobby. Maybe someone from the SigForum can swing by and help you get set up.

The human condition really is heartbreaking...great advise in this thread!

Thanks for telling us. As mentioned, others have said much better than I could at this point. I would feel grateful I meant something to him as well. I would also quickly tender to his request knowing that you are lifting one of his burdens from him as he clearly wanted you to have it.

Be honored that your friend wants to pass on to you something that he obviously enjoyed and cherished.

Maybe you could find a way to preserve and cherish his reloading equipment. One day you may pass it on. Preserve his legacy and story. That's a great way to honor his friendship.

quote:

Originally posted by NMPinNYC:
Sad indeed, and agree you should go, and spend time with him, and be grateful, and oblige his wish please.

Reminds me of when my best friend was dying of cancer. We spent a lot of time sitting on his front porch just being together. Often not saying anything just silently communing. The hot radiation they were using to treat his cancer was burning badly. Most of his head was already black from the radiation.

He asked me what he should do about his situation. Told him I could not tell him what to do, but could tell him what I would do, how I would deal with it.

Told him I would stop the radiation treatment as it was not helping and in fact was doing more damage than the cancer. He did. About 10 days later he died in his sleep. I miss him, a lot.

I am sad thinking about him. Hope to see him again some day.

The tragedy of life is not death but what things we let die inside of us while we live.

A philosophy I now hold to with each year closer I step. I wish him peace. He wishes you to have a part of his life that you might remember him.

A very dear friend of mine passed away recently . Sometimes we would go for months without talking and then one day one of us would call the other one and all was well . We had a long dry spell and I called him and we had a good chat . Two weeks later his wife sent me a text telling me of his passing . I'm so glad I was moved to call him .

It's all part of getting older as well as part of life.

I shoot with a bunch of retired people every week. Once a week with one bunch and once a week with another bunch.

In the past 4 years we've lost 4 guys and 1 woman. The woman was run over by a 17 year old kid who was probably texting while driving and the others died from natural causes.

I'm getting tired of attending wakes, but it's better than the alternative.