A broom. It’s not a fucking complicated piece of equipment. It’s a stick, with bristles. Most people use it to gather up spilled stuff from the floor. You would think it’s a fucking intercontinental rocket when these fuckmuppets get ahold of it.

Simply put, place one hand at the top, one hand at the 1/2 to 5/8 point, and gently gather shit into a pile.

It’s not a fucking wind machine that creates a tornado of souls to carry away the shit on the floor.

It’s not a multi point micro trebuchet that launches particles to the next kingdom.

It’s a fucking broom. It’s used to sweep. This is a creation that goes back to cavemen. Like the half brained knuckle dragging, mouth breathers figured out how to take some straw and a stick and keep their floors clean.

So it turns out some people walking amongst us, have more inabilities than people of the half brained caveman times. Evolution is a myth. I can prove that cavemen still exist.

These youthful brain donors grab it like it’s the sword in the stone and they’re about to extract it. Two hands, one at the top and one directly beneath it. Then try to fuck about with all the shit on the floor. Basically just spreading it across, well across fucking everywhere.

I’m not joking. There’s more than one kid that works for me that I am teaching how to use an ordinary household broom.

The look of bewilderment when they see me pile up shit, then use my arm to brace it and one handed sweep shit into a dustpan. They look at me like I’m Jesus, curing lepers, making the blind see, and the paralyzed walk.

WTF happened with parenting, where kids can’t run a fucking broom. It’s the most menial task available.

There should be an "app" for that, easily downloaded onto the smart-ass phone so your $15 per hour parasites can spend a few hours staring at their interactive device screen while the boss sweeps the floor.

My 6yr old's got it after some basic instruction. He's looking for a job...

Having a long time on the job, and having great teachers who took the time out to show me stuff, I have gone out of my way to try to teach younger officers on my job. Now that I'm a sgt, it happens almost all the time. I have no problem, and actually enjoy it.

But a BROOM? A fucking broom?
Sorry kid, get the fuck out!

Sponge? Can they use a sponge?

There are some things that should be just intuitive. If it isn’t then fired. Not sufficiently intuitive to know safety for others and self.

Well... they probably can't tie a tie either and might very well eat soup with their hands.

Can't expect too much these days for $15/hr.

-Rob

quote:

Originally posted by BurtonRW:
Well... they probably can't tie a tie either and might very well eat soup with their hands.

Can't expect too much these days for $15/hr.

-Rob

I can use a broom, and eat soup with a spoon.
But, I usually need a refresher for a tie, I wear one infrequently enough (2-3x/yr) that it's not as intuitive as tying your shoes.

quote:

Originally posted by Beancooker:
WTF happened with parenting, where kids can’t run a fucking broom. It’s the most menial task available.

D'ya suppose any one of these kids was ever once required to use a broom or leaf rake at home? Or even bothered watching anybody else do so? There's your answer.

quote:

Originally posted by P250UA5:
But, I usually need a refresher for a tie, I wear one infrequently enough (2-3x/yr) that it's not as intuitive as tying your shoes.

I wore ties to work for many, many years. So now, despite the fact they now get worn only for weddings or funerals every few years, they're still no problem for me.

quote:

Originally posted by Beancooker:
They look at me like I’m Jesus, curing lepers, making the blind see, and the paralyzed walk.

Dude, I laughed so effing hard when I read that line. Good one!

This was from "The Neighborhood" show on TV the other night.

quote:

Originally posted by ensigmatic:

quote:

Originally posted by P250UA5:
But, I usually need a refresher for a tie, I wear one infrequently enough (2-3x/yr) that it's not as intuitive as tying your shoes.

I wore ties to work for many, many years. So now, despite the fact they now get worn only for weddings or funerals every few years, they're still no problem for me.

I've pretty much only ever needed one for interviews, weddings & funerals, and the occasional formal party. Could probably almost count on both hands, maybe 1 foot too, how many times I've needed one in almost 37 years.

quote:

A broom. It’s not a fucking complicated piece of equipment. It’s a stick, with bristles. Most people use it to gather up spilled stuff from the floor. You would think it’s a fucking intercontinental rocket when these fuckmuppets get ahold of it.

I learned when I was about six. Learning how to properly mop a floor and handle a mop bucket is a lost art as well. Those with USN fathers are ahead of the game.

quote:

Originally posted by ensigmatic:

quote:

Originally posted by Beancooker:
WTF happened with parenting, where kids can’t run a fucking broom. It’s the most menial task available.

D'ya suppose any one of these kids was ever once required to use a broom or leaf rake at home? Or even bothered watching anybody else do so? There's your answer.

Previous adults have failed them, one of us has to step up.

quote:

Originally posted by ZSMICHAEL:
I learned when I was about six. Learning how to properly mop a floor and handle a mop bucket is a lost art as well. Those with USN fathers are ahead of the game.

No shit! lolololololololololol


[QOUTE] Originally posted by beancooker:
Young kids and the inabilities they have, like the inability to use a broom.[/QUOTE]

Noah, this should be in running for post of the year!

When I saw the thread title, I concluded something very different than what the thread was actually about. You see, I've been having a bit of a back-and-forth with my eight year old son about sweeping the floor when he cleans out the litterbox. I've shown him how I want it done, he does it... not the way I want done. Anyways, I figured "young kids" and an "inability to use a broom" was a conversation I didn't need to retread elsewhere. I didn't realize we are talking working age, ostensibly grown-ass adults who can't use a fucking broom. This broom shit? Elementary. During the college years, I paid my way washing dishes and working a broom and a mop. You know where dirty floors absolutely don't fly? In places where you wash dishes. I can work a broom and a mop with the absolute best of them. By about age 19, everyone should have at least graduated from "How To Work A Broom: 101." You should be about a hundred and ninety three pages deep in a master's dissertation titled "A Protocol for Comparing Comprehensive Wet and Dry Mopping vs Overt Wet Mopping and Associated Resultant Cleanliness: A Randomized Controlled Trial."

Noah, whatever you do, don't ask them to mop the floor next. You'll either have to call for an ambulance or a fire truck.

A broom you say…my neighbor doesn’t know how to use a much more complicated tool to dig a hole.

Seriously he didn’t know how to use a shovel!

After I showed him the basics I left and watched through the window so he wouldn’t see me chuckle.

quote:

Originally posted by Beancooker:

I’m not joking. There’s more than one kid that works for me that I am teaching how to use an ordinary household broom.

The look of bewilderment when they see me pile up shit, then use my arm to brace it and one handed sweep shit into a dustpan. They look at me like I’m Jesus, curing lepers, making the blind see, and the paralyzed walk.

I guess you ain't kidding. Do you have to teach them how to wipe their ass, too? It sounds like it.

Something is wrong when you can't look at a broom and figure out how it's used.

True story:

My grandfather walked into a factory when he was 14 and asked if they had any work for him. The man he asked said no. My grandfather looked around and said “Your floors could use sweeping”. My grandfather got hired to sweep the floors.

Someone mentioned a tie? Most young people's ties are printed on their tee shirts.