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Unapologetic Old
School Curmudgeon
Picture of Lord Vaalic
posted
Oh he's drunk. How would he know where we're going?




Don't weep for the stupid, or you will be crying all day
 
Posts: 10719 | Location: TN | Registered: December 18, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Still finding my way
Picture of Ryanp225
posted Hide Post
Her first baby come out sideways. She didn't scream or nuthin.
 
Posts: 10827 | Registered: January 04, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
No good deed
goes unpunished
Picture of cheesegrits
posted Hide Post
People train runs outta S-S-Stubbville.
 
Posts: 2680 | Location: The Carolinas | Registered: June 08, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Conductor in Residence
Picture of Maestro
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Ryanp225:
Her first baby come out sideways. She didn't scream or nuthin.


She's a real trooper!
 
Posts: 3674 | Location: Tampa Bay, FL | Registered: July 23, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Rule #1: Use enough gun
Picture of Bigboreshooter
posted Hide Post
"Honey, I'd like you to meet Del Griffith, he's got some amusing anecodotes for you. Oh and here's a gun so you can blow your brains out. You'll thank me for it."



When a strong man, fully armed, guards his own house, his possessions are undisturbed. Luke 11:21


"Every nation in every region now has a decision to make.
Either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists." -- George W. Bush

 
Posts: 14826 | Location: Birmingham, Alabama | Registered: February 25, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Unhyphenated American
Picture of Floyd D. Barber
posted Hide Post
Car Rental Agent: How may I help you?

Neal: You can start by wiping that fucking dumb-ass smile off your rosey, fucking, cheeks! And you can give me a fucking automobile: a fucking Datsun, a fucking Toyota, a fucking Mustang, a fucking Buick! Four fucking wheels and a seat!

Car Rental Agent: I really don't care for the way you're speaking to me.

Neal: And I really don't care for the way your company left me in the middle of fucking nowhere with fucking keys to a fucking car that isn't fucking there. And I really didn't care to fucking walk, down a fucking highway, and across a fucking runway to get back here to have you smile in my fucking face. I want a fucking car RIGHT FUCKING NOW!

Car Rental Agent: May I see your rental agreement?

Neal: I threw it away.

Car Rental Agent: Oh boy.

Neal: Oh boy, what?

Car Rental Agent: You're fucked!


__________________________________________________________________________________
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Always remember that others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.
Richard M Nixon

It's nice to be important, it's more important to be nice.
Billy Joe Shaver

NRA Life Member

 
Posts: 7353 | Location: Between the Moon and New York City. | Registered: November 27, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Rule #1: Use enough gun
Picture of Bigboreshooter
posted Hide Post
You play with your balls a lot.



When a strong man, fully armed, guards his own house, his possessions are undisturbed. Luke 11:21


"Every nation in every region now has a decision to make.
Either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists." -- George W. Bush

 
Posts: 14826 | Location: Birmingham, Alabama | Registered: February 25, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Unhyphenated American
Picture of Floyd D. Barber
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Bigboreshooter:
You play with your balls a lot.


You know what'd make me happy?

Another couple of balls, and an extra set of fingers?


__________________________________________________________________________________
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Always remember that others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.
Richard M Nixon

It's nice to be important, it's more important to be nice.
Billy Joe Shaver

NRA Life Member

 
Posts: 7353 | Location: Between the Moon and New York City. | Registered: November 27, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
Those aren't pillows!!!


___________________________
"Those that can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others..."
 
Posts: 714 | Location: NE Iowa | Registered: October 30, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Rule #1: Use enough gun
Picture of Bigboreshooter
posted Hide Post
If they told you wolverines would make good house pets, would you believe them?



When a strong man, fully armed, guards his own house, his possessions are undisturbed. Luke 11:21


"Every nation in every region now has a decision to make.
Either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists." -- George W. Bush

 
Posts: 14826 | Location: Birmingham, Alabama | Registered: February 25, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Get my pies
outta the oven!

Picture of PASig
posted Hide Post
Del: I can't forget it. I am sorry. I had no idea it was your cab. Let me make it up to you. How about a nice hot dog and a beer.
Neal: No thanks.
Del: Just a hot dog then.
Neal: I'm kinda picky about what I eat.
Del: Some coffee?
Neal: No.
Del: Milk?
Neal: No.
[becoming more annoyed]
Del: Soda?
Neal: No.
[annoyance rising]
Del: Tea?
Neal: No
Del: LifeSavers?
Neal: No.
Del: Slurpee?
Neal: Sir - please.
Del: Just let me know. I'm here.
[smiles, shaking his finger at Neal]
Del: I knew I knew ya!


 
Posts: 33601 | Location: Pennsylvania | Registered: November 12, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Probably on a trip
Picture of furlough
posted Hide Post
What do you think the temperature is?

One.




This and no other is the root from which a tyrant springs; when he first appears above ground he is a protector.
Plato
 
Posts: 1768 | Location: Texas! | Registered: June 13, 2013Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Probably on a trip
Picture of furlough
posted Hide Post
Do you feel this vehicle is safe for highway travel?

Yes sir, I do.




This and no other is the root from which a tyrant springs; when he first appears above ground he is a protector.
Plato
 
Posts: 1768 | Location: Texas! | Registered: June 13, 2013Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Get my pies
outta the oven!

Picture of PASig
posted Hide Post


Del:
I've got two dollars and a Casio.

Hotel Clerk:
I'm afraid I'm going to have to say goodnight...


 
Posts: 33601 | Location: Pennsylvania | Registered: November 12, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Back, and
to the left
Picture of 83v45magna
posted Hide Post
There ya go. Last room in the complex.

You mean Sh-share?
 
Posts: 7230 | Location: Dallas | Registered: August 04, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of side_shot
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Floyd D. Barber:
Car Rental Agent: How may I help you?

Neal: You can start by wiping that fucking dumb-ass smile off your rosey, fucking, cheeks! And you can give me a fucking automobile: a fucking Datsun, a fucking Toyota, a fucking Mustang, a fucking Buick! Four fucking wheels and a seat!

Car Rental Agent: I really don't care for the way you're speaking to me.

Neal: And I really don't care for the way your company left me in the middle of fucking nowhere with fucking keys to a fucking car that isn't fucking there. And I really didn't care to fucking walk, down a fucking highway, and across a fucking runway to get back here to have you smile in my fucking face. I want a fucking car RIGHT FUCKING NOW!

Car Rental Agent: May I see your rental agreement?

Neal: I threw it away.

Car Rental Agent: Oh boy.

Neal: Oh boy, what?

Car Rental Agent: You're fucked!


I love it


"They that can give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."
--Benjamin Franklin, 1759--


Special Edition - Reverse TT 229ST.Sig Logo'd CTC Grips., Bedair guide rod

 
Posts: 1245 | Location: New Hampshire "Live Free or Die"  | Registered: September 02, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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