Sigforum has been so wonderful to me on many occasions. Always happy to give back.

These are off of my P320 full size, about 2 years old.

First person to post something funny enough to give me a good laugh gets them sent out Monday.

Thanks!

A man walks into the local ice cream parlor and tells the attendant he wants a gallon of vanilla, a gallon of strawberry and a gallon of chocolate ice cream.
"Sorry" says the attendant, "we're all out of chocolate ice cream."
"In that case" says the man, "I'll have a pint of vanilla, a pint of strawberry and a pint of chocolate."
"I told you we don't have any chocolate ice cream, buddy" says the attendant, becoming slightly annoyed.
"OK, in that case" says the man, "I'll have a scoop of vanilla, a scoop of strawberry and a scoop of chocolate."
"Look, mister, what does the V-A-N in vanilla spell?"
"Van" he replies, "But what does that have to do with ice cream?"
"Never mind, what does the S-T-R-A-W in strawberry spell?"
"Straw" he answers, "But I still don't understand what this has got to do with my getting the ice cream I want?"
"What does the F-U-C-K in chocolate spell?" asks the attendant.
"Wait a minute" says the man, "there's no fuck in chocolate!"
"That's what I've been trying to tell you, dick brain, now get out of my store."

Free 320 night sites? Surely you can't be serious?




https://youtu.be/KM2K7sV-K74?t=3s

Back in the late 19th century, a Indian Chief name Chief Bowels went to the local town to complain about his people having to move to the local government office. He couldn't read English and went into office what he thought was the government office. He said, Bowels won't move. The office guy (a doctor) said, hmmm, take this, and come back tomorrow. A day later, Bowels came back and said Ugh, Bowels still will not move. The dr. a little perplexed, said take two of these and come back tomorrow. Next day, Chief Bowels came in and said, Ugh, Bowels will not move period. The dr. growing frustrated gave him a tripple dose, and said come back this afternoon. A few hours later, Chief Bowels came in, looking quite pale for a Indian, said Ugh, Chief Bowels have to move, Teepee full of $hit!

Hillary with Michelle Obama as VP 2020

My Detroit Lions are gonna win the Super Bowl!

Hillary Clinton on next years NRA vote for Board of Directors

I read that one way you can tell if someone is a terrorist is that they're yelling "Aloha Snackbar".

One of my all-time favorites:

A group of men are changing in locker room at a golf club. Suddenly a cell phone on the bench starts to ring, and a man puts it on speaker phone as he continues getting dressed. He says "Hello?", the woman on the other line says "Honey, it's me. Are you still at the golf club?"

"Yeah, what's going on?"

"I'm out shopping and found this great new leather coat, and it's only $15,00 dollars, can I get it?"

"Sure, if you like it."

"Thank you! I was also at the dealership earlier and saw the new Mercedes models, and there is one that's absolutely gorgeous, and I really want it!"

"How much is it?"

"About $180,000..."

"Alright, but for that price I want all the extra options included."

"Great! One other thing. The house we wanted last year is back on the market, but they're asking for $21,500,000."

"Well, go ahead and make them an offer, but don't go above $21,250,000."

"Really? Okay! I love you, see you later!"

"Love you too."

The rest of the men in the club stare at him wide-eyed. As he hangs up the phone he looks at the men and asks, "Anyone know whose phone this is?"

SIGARMS229 IS THE WINNER!

I am a sucker for Airplane!

Email me your address and they will go out this week.

Awesome. Thanks.

Email you a minute.