I always get confused in following aviation related threads. This list of terms with layman explanation of the term meaning should help me? Are there others?

Useful Aviation Terms
AIRSPEED – Speed of an airplane. (Deduct 25% when listening to a retired fighter pilot.)
BANK – The folks who hold the lien on most pilots’ cars.
CARBURETOR ICING – A phenomenon reported to the FAA by pilots immediately after they run out of gas.
CONE OF CONFUSION – An area about the size of New Jersey located near the final approach fix at an airport.
DEAD RECKONING – You reckon correctly, or you are.
DESTINATION – Geographical location 30 minutes beyond the pilot’s bladder saturation point.
ENGINE FAILURE – A condition that occurs when all fuel tanks mysteriously become filled with low-octane air.
FIREWALL – Section of the aircraft specifically designed to funnel heat and smoke into the cockpit.
GLIDE DISTANCE – Roughly half the distance from an airplane to the nearest emergency landing field.
HYDROPLANE – An airplane designed to land long on a short and wet runway.
LEAN MIXTURE – Nonalcoholic beer.
MINI MAG LITE – Device designed to support the AA battery industry.
NANOSECOND – Time delay between the Low Fuel Warning light and the onset of carburetor icing.
PARASITIC DRAG – A pilot who bums a ride and complains about the service.
RICH MIXTURE – What you order at another pilot’s promotion party.
ROGER – Used when you’re not sure what else to say.
SECTIONAL CHART – Any chart that ends 25 nm short of your destination.
SERVICE CEILING – Altitude at which cabin crew can serve drinks.
SPOILERS – FAA Inspectors.
STALL – Technique used to explain to the bank why your car payment is late.
STEEP BANKS – Banks that charge pilots more than 10% interest
TURN & BANK INDICATOR – An instrument largely ignored by pilots.
USEFUL LOAD – Volumetric capacity of the aircraft, disregarding weight.
WAC CHART – Directions to the Army female barracks.
YANKEE – Any pilot who has to ask the New Orleans tower to “Say again”.

Thanks, enjoyed that.

PROP WASH - For cleaning propellers.
JET WASH - For cleaning jet engines.

The YANKEE definition reminded me of a story. A C-130 was bound for Hawaii. Along the route, the controller cleared them direct to Hickam. The copilot queried him, requesting direct to the Honolulu NAVAID. The controller again cleared them direct Hickam, and the copilot again requested Honolulu. The controller came back with “Cannot say ‘Honoruru.’ Cleared direct Hickam.” So, they went to Hickam.

I once stopped for fuel somewhere in AL, and was delighted to find a FSS on the field. After a very thorough wx briefing including forecast winds 25 knots on the chin, the nice briefer asked if there was anything else he could help me with.

I said "Sure, how about a tailwind?"


The briefer's immediate response, in his best Southern drawl, "We don't give tailwinds to Yankees"

I remember a story, years ago, that The State of Montana had a State airplane for the Governor, it was named “Big Sky One”.

They were asking landing instructions in Wyoming and the Wyoming controller kept referring to them as “Pig Sty One”.

After a number of terse responses from Big Sky One to correct their ID, they finally gave up and landed anyway.

It’s funny how sometimes atmospheric conditions make radio transmissions sound a little hard to understand


Presidents Plane: Air Force One
Secretary of Agriculture Plane: John Deere One
Secretary of Education Plane: School Bus One

quote:

Originally posted by aileron:

I once stopped for fuel somewhere in AL, and was delighted to find a FSS on the field. After a very thorough wx briefing including forecast winds 25 knots on the chin, the nice briefer asked if there was anything else he could help me with.

I said "Sure, how about a tailwind?"


The briefer's immediate response, in his best Southern drawl, "We don't give tailwinds to Yankees"

I made a fuel stop (really a bladder stop) on my way to visit the kids / grandkids. Small airport, small FBO. I used the restroom, and then paid for the fuel. There was a flight instructor with a student in the FBO, they were sitting at a table with a sectional chart in front of them, the instructor was showing the student how to lay out a flight. On my way out of the door, I paused and asked, "Ohio is that way, right?" while pointing in the wrong direction. The looks that I got as I walked out, were priceless.

For fun, preflight with dark sunglasses and a white cane. Feel the way around the airplane. Note the reaction of those around you.

We did a trip in a Sabreliner for a corporate group. The CEO knew one of his board was a nervous flyer, and asked us to put some duct tape near the door. We had several strips handing down, and one from the leading edge slat. When the board member climbed in, he shrieked, "What's that?"

"Oh, that's always falling down. Sorry. We just smooth it out, and it's fine." We pushed the leading edge slat into place and taped it there. The CEO was appreciative.

For genuine fun, with a long stick of jumpers, when the red light comes on and everyone stands up, removes the static caribiner from the person ahead of them, clips into the static line, and the doors open, reach into your field jacket and remove an air sick bag into which you put a scoop of soup earlier in the day. Pretend to vomit, then reach into the bag, take a big handfull and eat it. As the green light comes on and everyone shuffles to the door, it's like a tidal wave of throw-up as one person after another loses it.

Flight humor.

squawking ,
you forgot squawking,
it's my favorite term

In the 1960s, I was an instructor at a large instrument training school at Chicago Midway airport.

With the cold Chicago winters and the moist wind blowing in off the lake, the possibility of airframe icing in the clouds was always a concern, so on days when that was likely, we always sent an instructor up, first thing in the morning, to check for actual icing, while we listened to the radio in the instructors' lounge.

We took turns making the "ice check" flights. One morning, one of the instructors was climbing through the overcast. At that time we did not have Mode C (altitude reporting) transponders in the school airplanes. Chicago Approach control, needing to know what altitudes were occupied, said, "Seven zero alpha tango, say your altitude."

The smart-ass instructor said "Your altitude."

Approach control said, "Seven zero alpha tango,say 'cancel my IFR clearance.'"

Smart-ass instructor replied, "Climbing through three thousand."

FLIGHT LINE: Item new employees are sent to retrieve from supply. Usually on the shelf between the muffler bearings and Knuten Valves.

Many years ago, when Republic Airlines merged with Northwest , Northwest sent a “supervisor “ to Republics base in Detroit, to show us how it was supposed to be done. He knew nothing about airplanes, but was a pain in the ass. It was winter and busy , so they sent him from one concourse to another looking for snow tires for a 747.