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Hoping for better pharmaceuticals
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John, Lewis, and Bob were construction workers on the Empire State Building, and one day they were sitting on the steel girders about to eat their lunch.

(Just like in that famous photo.)

John opens his lunch box, and he finds a turkey sandwich.

"Not another turkey sandwich! I swear, fellas, if I open my lunchbox tomorrow and it's another darned turkey sandwich, I'm going to jump off of this thing!"

Lewis and Bob are laughing – until Lewis opens his box, and finds a roast beef sandwich. He says, "I'm so fed up with roast beef! If my wife tries to feed me another one of these, I'm jumping too! I swear!"

They both glare at Bob while he opens his lunch box:

"I don't believe it! Another peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Boys, if I have to eat another one of these tomorrow, I'm jumping with you!"

The next day, they're sitting up on the girder again.

John opens his lunch box, and it's another turkey sandwich. So he curses out loud, stands up, and jumps to his death.

Lewis unwraps his lunch, and finds that his wife made another roast beef sandwich for him. Inconsolable, he leaps from the steel girder.

Bob's face is grim now, and he's trying not to throw up.

Shaking, he opens his lunchbox and finds a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Even though he's all alone, he is true to his word and jumps to his death also.

Later that afternoon, the coroner's office calls in the three men's wives so they can collect the bodies of their husbands. Each of them is handed a piece of paper – suicide notes – that were found in their husband's lunchbox.

John's piece of paper says: "It was the turkey sandwich." His wife collapses onto the floor and howls, "If only I made something different!"

Lewis's piece of paper reads: "I'm sorry honey, but I just couldn't face up to another one of those roast beef sandwiches. Please forgive me."
She throws the message on the floor and stamps on it.

"That sonofabitch killed himself over a stupid sandwich!? I can't believe it!"

Bob's wife stares at her piece of paper in disbelief.

"I don't understand..."
"... Bob always made his own sandwiches."

Getting shot is no achievement. Hitting your enemy is. FFL(01) NRA Endowment Member
Posts: 8552 | Location: Peoria, Arizona | Registered: April 02, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Chip away the stone
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Clearly belongs in the Groaner thread Razz
Posts: 11463 | Registered: August 22, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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These guys were so dumb....that all they had to do was swap sandwiches.

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Tri-State Gun collectors Life Member
Posts: 2558 | Location: Ohio | Registered: December 18, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
friend to all
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Good one, I love it!
Posts: 2351 | Location: Wyoming | Registered: June 05, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Partial dichotomy
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Originally posted by Aquabird:
These guys were so dumb....that all they had to do was swap sandwiches.

Great minds think alike!

And when I picture Bob, I see Steve Carell. Big Grin

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