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National Law Enforcement Appreciation Day (LEAD) Karma: ** P228 ** ----->> ** WINNER = Klusk2 ** Login/Join 
7.62mm Crusader
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quote:
Originally posted by Ozarkwoods:
I don’t know if retired LEO are included in this awesome karma if so please include me.

Funny story

We were called to remove one from the bar in town my partner and I arrive about the same time. Going in we see this biker in leathers his size reminded me of Andre the Giant of wrestling fame. I say 6’ 10” tall and pushing 350 lbs. He had his drink glasses lined up on the bar and he was flicking them one by one off the bar. We walk up to him I am 5’11” 235 lbs my partner is 5’7” 175lbs. I am thinking at this point we have a real task ahead of us if he doesn’t want to go. I ask the biker how he is doing as he flicks off another glass and says nothing back to me. So I let him know that the bartender wants him to leave the bar. I add that he has to leave the bar. He turns his head sizes both my partner and I up and says “Who is going to make me”. I am thinking this is not how I want this to go. I turn to my partner who is quite a bit smaller then me. As the biker is watching what we are doing. I say to my partner “Do you want me to hold your coat?” I get the WTF look from my partner. The biker looks at us and begins to laugh so hard he gets up and says to us you guys are OK and walks out of the bar without incident.

Humor does come in handy at times.
That was shameful but funny as hell... Big Grin
 
Posts: 14221 | Registered: December 23, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Novice Elk Harvester
Picture of ronnied316
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Thanks for the generous karma, 12131!

I'll have 12 years come the end of February.

Seen a lot of interesting, amazing, and downright depressing things.

Not the best or coolest story, as far as cool cop stuff goes, but did a polar plunge in Lake Tahoe, in full uniform, with a bunch of Special Olympics athletes. This job has given me the opportunity to work with many types of people, but the Special Olympics kids will always have a special place in my heart.


"SUCCESS only comes before WORK in the dictionary"
 
Posts: 329 | Location: SF Bay Area, CA | Registered: July 10, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
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Wow. Great Karma and count me in. 19 years on the job. Still love it!! Two little stories and moderately funny.

After college I worked the jail while testing for PD’s. It was a few weeks before I left for the police academy and I was assigned to bring a prisoner up for a bond review with the judge. The prisoner goes nuts, starts fighting, and yells “fuck you” to the judge. As my partner and I are dragging this guy from the courtroom the judge orders is to “drag that man back here”. So we oblige. The judge looks at me and asks “what did that man say to me”? I gulped and said “fuck you, your honor”. The judge yells “that’s 10 days contempt”! I look at the judge and then my partner and ask “him or me”?

The other story.

I was FTO’ing a new guy and we get a call on “one eyed Charlie” Charlie was famous in our little city as being an old school bad dude who loved to drink and fight along with other activities. He earned his name, from what I understand from the old guys in the job, was from a fight where he cut a finger or two off a guy with a sword and the guy returned the favor by putting a tire iron in his eye. Anyway, we arrest Charlie and he is going off at the jail how he was going to “kick all our asses”, etc... in the middle of his tirade he stops, looks at my rookie, looks him up and down, and says “I’d make love to you”. Couldn’t help but laugh at my poor rookie on that one.
 
Posts: 2450 | Registered: January 17, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Hot Fuzz
Picture of Turbo216
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Thank you for the generous Karma!! Please count me in! I just started year 17 and it's been quite a ride.

I've got all sorts of stories about funny, dumb, horrific and sad things that I've seen others do, but I'll share a story about my own personal idiot moment in uniform.



I had about 15 minutes to kill before my scheduled oil change for my new squad car so I figured I'd swing by the gas station for a fill up and a car wash (now, we can have inmates wash our squads, but I'd rather do it myself or pay for it out of pocket rather than have them get .25 days credit for washing my car.)

Anyways, I fill up and head over to the car wash. There were no cars in line while I was at the pump, but now there was like 3. I was irritated and called the wife to check in with her while I was waiting.

While we were chatting it was my turn to go in and we continued talking. When the wash was over I turned the key to start the car and "click," nothing. Again I turned the key and just got a "click." I'd been having battery issues with the car, namely it would go dead all the frigging time, and I immediately panicked.

The door opens up behind me, and the next car in line starts to pull in. I'm like "Shit! I'm dead in the water. Now what??!!" I hang up on the wife and get out and start trying to push my squad out of the wash. The lady behind me is giving me a strange look as I give it my all pushing my car with everything I've got.

I actually made good progress until I got up to the blow dryer thing. I could not overcome the hurricane force winds and it actually started to blow my car backwards. I briefly considered pushing on the trunk, but the slight sag outside the car wash meant I would have to chase after my car and hop in...not happening, too many witnesses.

Defeated, I sat back in my car to call dispatch to send a tow truck over to pull me out of the car wash and haul my car to the dealership. As I was dialing, I happened to glance at the dash and noticed that my RPM's were hovering just under 1000. Yup, my car was running the whole time. I put it in drive and pulled out. I can only imagine how many times the lady watching me had been like "W..T..F.."

I caught a bit of crap from the service garage when I was late for my appointment and when I shared my excuse we had a good laugh.

Word soon got out and I've spent the last year getting constant picture texts from inside of car wash"s from co-workers in an attempt to induce anxiety.



Hater of fun since 2001!
 
Posts: 477 | Location: Minnesota | Registered: January 11, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
cigar smoking 11b4
Picture of goatboyz
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Awesome karma! Please include me..

My most interesting day included an assist for our local EMS crew. The call center took a frantic call asking for help in getting the caller to the hospital. He refused to say what the issue was, and as a result I was sent.

Lets say the caller's name is "Bob". I should also mention that "Bob" weighed close to 600 pounds. When I arrived, our EMS guys, fire, and I were able to determine that the "Bob" had one of the old Time Warner Cable remote controls (the ones that had a large round area about 2"-2.5" wide in the center of the remote) lodged in his rectum.

Once "Bob" was loaded into the ambulance, I had to follow and he was rather uncooperative. Did I mention that "Bob" weighed almost 600 pounds? As part of the protocol, the hospital did x-rays and it was decided at some point that "Bob" with nursing staff assistance needed to get cleaned up... You know, because he weighted almost 600 pounds and couldn't do it himself...

During that clean up, a second remote was found between the flaps or rolls of skin and fat on one of "Bob's" sides. When it was found, "Bob" exclaimed. "Damnit I thought I'd looked everyplace for that thing!?" Apparently, the remote had been missing for quite some time, because it was the replacement that "Bob" slipped, fell, and landed on causing that remote to magically end up being inserted into his rectal cavity...

Best job ever. Except for days like that.. Thanks for the support!


‎"I have a high art; I hurt with cruelty those who would damage me."
-- Archilocus, 650 B.C.
 
Posts: 1208 | Location: Behind the cheddar curtain. | Registered: July 17, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of JR78
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Out-friggin-standing!
Found a severed head on the railroad tracks once.
Assisted on a medical call and the gentleman had 12 golf balls inside him.
Arrested a guy twice in one shift for auto theft. He attempted to steal another car in the jail parking lot.
Assisted Walter Payton changing a tire on his Rolls Royce.
Helped deliver two babies.


______________________________
Men who carry guns for a living do not seek reward outside of the guild. The most cherished gift is a nod from his peers.
 
Posts: 1739 | Location: DFW | Registered: December 17, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
It's a sick world
and I am a happy guy
Picture of noliecop
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This is an amazing KARMA 12131. I know you will be rewarded in special way for doing this. I for one greatly appreciate it. I am retired and do not want to be included in the KARMA, but I had to tell you how totally in awe I am that you are doing this. Thank you sir!!
 
Posts: 1219 | Location: Chattanooga, TN, USA | Registered: September 04, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
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quote:
Originally posted by JR78:
Out-friggin-standing!
Found a severed head on the railroad tracks once.
Assisted on a medical call and the gentleman had 12 golf balls inside him.
Arrested a guy twice in one shift for auto theft. He attempted to steal another car in the jail parking lot.
Assisted Walter Payton changing a tire on his Rolls Royce.
Helped deliver two babies.


I also met Walter Payton. What a gentleman.
 
Posts: 4570 | Registered: August 18, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of Sig M11
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Going on year 21...

Most interesting day was September 11, 2001.

Responded to the Pentagon. Stood on the hill at the Navy Annex looking down at the building burning.

A lot of cases between then and now...

But that day always sticks out as a pivot point in my career.


________________________________________

I could kill 476 zombies before I have to reload.
 
Posts: 1287 | Location: Chadds Ford, PA | Registered: February 05, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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I'll put in, but I only work jail.

few days prior a fight had happened in a cell and the whole cell had been pepper sprayed. I come in, go through half the day, when a new inmate is brought in. New inmate goes into the cell, I tell him there had been a fight in there, and in he goes. its now getting to be about an hour before I leave and the inmate starting beating on the door, going crazy. Due to knowing the inmate, I get him to manage to calm down enough he is telling me his ass is burning. I look in the cell, sure enough, when they cleaned, they left the old toilet paper in the cell. It wasnt red, but man, you could smell it.


Used guns deserve a home too
 
Posts: 603 | Location: North Ga | Registered: August 06, 2016Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Live for today.
Tomorrow will
cost more
Picture of motor59
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Great karma. Count me in, please.

Let's see.... I was working Narcotics and responded to a call of a juvenile acting strangely in a park. Upon arrival, I observed the suspect kneeling on the ground, with his head buried in a mulch pile. After pulling him out out of the pile, I observed that he had painted half of his face yellow and the other half blue.....


...oh wait, that was the episode of Dragnet I watched last night.

Seriously, after almost 30 years OTJ, there are a number of standouts I could relay. Some funny, like the one armed shoplifter (how do you put the cuffs on a one armed man?), or the confused drunk being processed for DWI ("Are you injured? No, I'm spanish!"). Others were tense and adrenaline charged, like the single vehicle MVA where grandpa was ejected and dead at the scene, but then we found grandma jammed under the dash on the passenger side, covered with junk from the back seat. Had a heckuva time getting her out. Then there was the arrestee who somehow produced a .25 auto while being printed in the booking room. (Not my arrest or search.) That was a couple of exciting moments.

Some I'd like to forget. The suicides. The accidental death by asphyxiation of a 14 month old, who managed to wrap the cord from the blinds around her neck while in her crib.
The distracted mom who drove her minivan across the highway against the red, straight into the path of a semi, killing the four kids in the back. She was taking them to school and they were running late.

One that stands out was not serious, but it stayed with me as an example of sticking with your gut. I was on midnights, and doing a premise check of a local elementary school. Found a couple bikes in the back, which wasn't all that unusual, but then I thought I heard voices. Got out and started shaking doors, trying windows. Building seemed secure, but something was telling me it wasn't so. My Sgt came by, looked things over, told me I was imagining things, and to clear and resume.
As I'm pulling away, I catch a glimpse of a flash of light from the roof in my rear view mirror.
Turned around and watched for a moment. Saw it again on the inside of the cupola on the center of the roof.
Fire Dept responded with a ladder truck, and extracted 3 13 year olds from the cupola. They had scaled the three story building via the downspout, walked across the slate roof, and climbed into the cupola expecting to find a trap door leading into the school. The door was there, but bolted from the inside.

Finally, the one I'll never forget. Routine patrol, taking a pass through a part of the county known for illegal dumping. See a pickup truck and decide to follow it more out of curiosity and boredom than anything else. He sees us and like most people do when the cops are behind them, he taps the brake pedal to lower his speed.
One brake light is out. So, we decide to pull him over and check him out. Truck is occupied by a middle aged male.
While I'm inspecting his credentials, and trying to decide if his extreme nervousness is cause for concern, my partner, on the passenger side of the truck, sees what looks like a human foot protruding from under a tarp.
After we got him out and secured him in the back seat of our unit, we went back and looked. Dead teenaged female, with a GSW to the chest. Also, a shovel.
Found the gun under the pickup seat, in easy reach of the driver.

She turned out to be a prostitute.
He got 15-25.
We got a mention in the local fishwrap.




There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!
 
Posts: 2343 | Location: New Jersey - Exit 7 | Registered: March 21, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Fighting the good fight
Picture of RogueJSK
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quote:
Originally posted by motor59:
like the one armed shoplifter (how do you put the cuffs on a one armed man?)


Been there, done that. Big Grin Cuff them to the back of their belt or belt loop, or use a belly chain if they don't have pants with belt loops.
 
Posts: 20370 | Location: Northwest Arkansas | Registered: January 06, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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I dont even know where to start,but....

My partner and I got called out to a hooker who wanted to press charges because her "client wouldnt pay her". We joked forever about showing up on the guys doorstep dressed as pimps, demanding dough for our ho. We then argued the finer points of where the Pimp slap fit into the use of force continuum.
 
Posts: 1540 | Location: Western Wa | Registered: March 21, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Q,

Thank you for your generosity.



On a fairly normal day several summers ago I was given a traffic accidnet in parking lot.  The drivers had exchanged information but the caller felt the other driver was off and was worried about her ability to drive.

I caught up with her at her next stop.  Went through the rigamarol and she agreed to do voluntary roadside maneuvers.

I go through the questions about injuries and ask if there is anything thay could prevent her ability to walk and balance.

She replied that her legs are really sore from playing tennis (she was in a tennis outfit) earlier and she had been dancing a lot.  Having experienced running roadsides on those gifted with better balance than normal I asked her what kind to document it.  She looked at me and said pole.

After an awkward moment of silence I raised my eyebrows and said "pole?"  She went on to explain that she owns a production company...not just any one, an adult production company. She had converted a rather large house into a studio and was making a tidey sum of money.  They were preparing for a big shoot and she had been doing a lot of dancing on the pole for the shoot.

One of my friends knows the deputy in the next county who does the sex offender registration.  The young ladies head quarters was well known as there were severl sex offenders living there.

JD
 
Posts: 342 | Location: Northern Colorado  | Registered: May 09, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Live for today.
Tomorrow will
cost more
Picture of motor59
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by RogueJSK:
quote:
Originally posted by motor59:
like the one armed shoplifter (how do you put the cuffs on a one armed man?)


Been there, done that. Big Grin Cuff them to the back of their belt or belt loop, or use a belly chain if they don't have pants with belt loops.


This particular guy was wearing a long raincoat over sweat pants. I ended up using my hobble wrapped around his waist until we got to the station, and then latched him up to the ring on the desk.

Whododat - I think I remember that case you mentioned. I started out in the town just north of that one in '81. Left for greener (civilian) pastures in '85, then saw the error of my ways and came back in '93.




There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!
 
Posts: 2343 | Location: New Jersey - Exit 7 | Registered: March 21, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
semi-reformed sailor
Picture of MikeinNC
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Last winter I was "training" a new to us officer...he had about ten years of experience and I knew him personally and was sure he was gonna be fine. It was my job to ensure he understood my departments policies. He was a former deputy and sometimes there is a huge gap between the two differing policing. Pete was asking me how we did things different and due to our constant call volume I was wondering if he was getting saturated...

I'm driving and looking on the left side of the road (we are in the hood and the only two white guys for miles) and I hear Pete say, " hey what's your mom doing on the corner?" I turn and see a hooker flagging a car, and I begin laughing hysterically.

I knew right then Pete was gonna be fine.


Another night we are dealing with a drunk Mexican outside of a fenced in patio for a bar, Pete starts talking to the guy in Spanish, and a really pretty girl on the other side of the fence says "hey you did that pretty good". Pete doesn't miss a beat and tells her he picked it up (Spanish) from Dora the Explorer.

I had to walk away.



"Violence, naked force, has settled more issues in history than has any other factor.”
― Robert A. Heinlein, Starship Troopers


 
Posts: 4960 | Location: 35-46.02N 077-55.54W | Registered: October 07, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Thanks for the Karma/Please count me in. 19 years of policing with/for the military. My coolest story is:I got a medical emergency call one night about 2am. get to the residence and the father a Lt Col. was hysterical screaming where's ems/where's ems, his wife was in the bathroom, her water had broken and she was in labor (their 3rd child). Fire Department arrived and delivered the baby. I had to calm dad down and help grandma calm down as she was hyperventilating.

James
 
Posts: 653 | Registered: March 29, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Wait, what?
Picture of gearhounds
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Awesome Karma! Please include me for a chance at probably Sig's best all around pistol. 24 years in, and 4 to go until mandatory retirement.

I drove an unmarked navy blue Explorer for a few years. I was in a remote area parking lot late one night, rain falling, and natures urge hits me. I get out leaving the drivers door opened to answer the call.

Sure enough, as I'm finishing up, here come headlights. I'm duckwalking around my ride, keeping it between us while trying to get "holstered". They park a short distance away, lights out. I sneak up just in time to see the interior light up from the back seat area as one of them lights up the crack pipe.

I guess getting high overrode any question why the only other car in the world was sitting there, door open, in the rain haha.

Another time, I had stopped a car for speeding; when the window came down, dope smell rolled out. As I'm dealing with my cite and release, dispatch tells me the registered owner has a warrant for several FTA's. I don't tell the kid who's driving, and he tells me the car belongs to his uncle. I get the number, call the uncle, and tell him what has transpired, and that I can only release the vehicle to the registered owner.

Guess what happened when he arrived to claim his car? Big Grin




Proudly deplorable
 
Posts: 7966 | Location: Martinsburg WV | Registered: April 02, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Sigforum's Official
Metalhead
Picture of DTREND75
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Please include me

7 years left till retirement!

When I had my K9 I helped with inner perimeter with George W. and then with Biden







Sensitive and caring since August 2009

Some people are like a Slinky....not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

 
Posts: 3738 | Location: PSST! Look behind you! | Registered: July 16, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
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Q,

Your generosity is astounding. Thank you for what you’ve done for the forum members. You don’t have to include me in the drawing, as I’m rarely of any help to anyone here. For your entertainment, though, I’ll share a couple stories. I’ve been doing this for 20 years, the last 12 being on SWAT, along with my other duties. I’ve run the gamut of patrol, DEA Task Force, street level drug unit, gang unit, plain clothes street crimes unit, and internet crimes against children unit.

I suppose my most interesting story involved a SWAT callout in 2009. In the morning, a guy went to a closed bar he owned with his wife and his adult stepson. The family had been in a dispute about the business. He shot and killed the stepson inside the bar and fled. He went to a convenience store he frequented and made comments to the clerk, which led to her calling 911 and the stepson’s body being discovered. The man was thought to have retuned home in a neighboring city after departing the store.

A city police officer volunteered to check the home, which was just outside city limits, for the male’s vehicle. The house was situated on a large property and was surrounded by lightly wooded areas, but had a wide open front yard and driveway. A patch of woods separated the main road from the lane that led to his and the surrounding neighbors’ driveways. As the officer drove on the lane in front of the house, he was met with rifle fire. Several bullets struck the windshield and driver door frame. He suffered losing an eye from fragmentation, but was able to reverse the patrol car and back away from the house. He stopped when the car collided with trees in the wooded area across the street. He was then rescued by other responding officers.

SWAT was called out and the agency began collecting intelligence on the male. It was learned from family that the male had multiple semiautomatic rifles and a Barrett .50 caliber. At that time, two M113’s were the only armored vehicles our team had, and the armor wouldn’t withstand.50 caliber.

Upon the team deploying, it was unknown if the male fled the home and was hiding in the surrounding wooded areas. Our callout uniforms were woodland camouflage, while our search warrant and “take down” uniforms were olive drab pants and gray shirt. The reason that’s important to this call was that the uniforms helped keep us undetected while searching the woods on foot and with a K9. During the search we came across the shot up and bloody patrol car. Eerie.

After the woods were cleared, if I recall correctly, it was determined he was still inside the house due to blinds being seen moving by our snipers.

We parked one of the M113’s about 25 yards from the house, facing the garage door, and hoped like hell the armor in conjunction with the engine would stop the .50 cal. Two surrounding counties sent BearCat and V150 armored vehicles which could defeat the .50. Generous amounts of gas were shot into the home over the course of hours. There was no response from within. The armored vehicles were used to push the male’s car up against his front door, and to knock in the garage door.

The bomb team’s camera-equipped robot was sent into the home. The male was apparently dead of a self-inflicted gunshot wound. When we entered the home, we found him dressed in camouflage, sitting in the open closet of the hallway that ran down the center of the home. He had an AK47 rifle loaded with a 100 round drum slung across his chest. In his right hand was the revolver he used to shoot himself under the chin. The Barrett was propped next to him and appeared to have a round jammed partially in the chamber. As we continued the clear the house, we located his wife in her nightgown laying on their bedroom floor, near the door. She was already dead from gunshot wounds.

In looking around the house, I quickly realized the male was “that guy”, which is why I consider this my most interesting story. “That guy” is the one who is absolutely prepared to take you on, kill you and anyone else, including himself. At several windows of the home, he had AR15’s staged with extra ammunition, gas mask, handguns, and beer. He was ready for us. Why he killed himself without firing at the team, we’ll never know. With a revolver, despite having multiple rifles. In just looking at the jammed Barrett, it appeared he tried to alter the bullet with some sort of plastic tip, which seemed to have caused the action to lock up.

As to why the team still has ill feelings towards our negotiators...the call went into action quickly and lasted about 13 hours. We were famished and dehydrated by the end of it. When we made it back to our truck, we found the negotiators had placed all of their pizza boxes and McDonald’s trash in our truck, leaving no food for us.
 
Posts: 413 | Location: FL | Registered: January 29, 2001Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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