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posted
Yeah. FLORIDUH.



MARTIN COUNTY, Fla. – A Florida man is under arrest after reportedly slapping his girlfriend in the face with a cheeseburger.

According to the Martin County Sheriff’s Office Facebook page, 30-year-old Kyle Jamison Jones “wanted it his way.”

Jones’ live-in girlfriend called police and said Jones woke her up abruptly by slapping her in the face with a cheeseburger, according to the post. She told police Jones then pulled her hair and kicked her down the stairs.

Jones reportedly admitted only to a verbal dispute, despite the food particles visible on the victim. He was charged with battery and taken to the Martin County Jail.

LINK: https://wgntv.com/2019/05/15/d...d-with-cheeseburger/
 
Posts: 17177 | Location: Stuck at home | Registered: January 02, 2015Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Fighting the good fight
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I had a case several years ago where one person struck another with a cinnamon roll.

Lots of pastry-related crime jokes after that one.
 
Posts: 32429 | Location: Northwest Arkansas | Registered: January 06, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Drug Dealer
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Link to original video: https://youtu.be/Y6ynmkaLsB8



When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth. - George Bernard Shaw
 
Posts: 15471 | Location: Virginia | Registered: July 03, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Thank you
Very little
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It would have been perfect FLMan Article if the report had said

"FL man slaps girlfriend in face with his Whopper"



 
Posts: 23244 | Location: Florida | Registered: November 07, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Anyone who wants to hit me with a cheeseburger can do so at any time. Preferably around mealtimes, but I guess I cant be too picky.




"The people hate the lizards and the lizards rule the people."
"Odd," said Arthur, "I thought you said it was a democracy."
"I did," said Ford, "it is."
"So," said Arthur, hoping he wasn't sounding ridiculously obtuse, "why don't the people get rid of the lizards?"
"It honestly doesn't occur to them. They've all got the vote, so they all pretty much assume that the government they've voted in more or less approximates the government they want."
"You mean they actually vote for the lizards."
"Oh yes," said Ford with a shrug, "of course."
"But," said Arthur, going for the big one again, "why?"
"Because if they didn't vote for a lizard, then the wrong lizard might get in."
 
Posts: 3509 | Location: Two blocks from the Center of the Universe | Registered: December 30, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Chip away the stone
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Good ol' Florida.

 
Posts: 11597 | Registered: August 22, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
If you see me running
try to keep up
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What a waste of a cheeseburger.
 
Posts: 4077 | Location: Friendswood Texas | Registered: August 24, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Why is this stuff always from Florida and New Jersey??

Oh!I forgot is is because there are so many people from New Jersey in Florida
 
Posts: 990 | Location: Windermere, Florida | Registered: February 11, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Thank you
Very little
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quote:
Originally posted by 0658:
Why is this stuff always from Florida and New Jersey??

Oh!I forgot is is because there are so many people from New Jersey in Florida


Because all the other states hide this stuff on the back pages, whereas FL like to be a leader!



 
Posts: 23244 | Location: Florida | Registered: November 07, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
"Member"
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quote:
Originally posted by ZSMICHAEL:
slapping his girlfriend in the face with a cheeseburger.


I'm strangely both turned on and hungry.


_____________________________________________________
Sliced bread, the greatest thing since the 1911.

 
Posts: 21053 | Location: 18th & Fairfax  | Registered: May 17, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
safe & sound
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quote:
woke her up abruptly by slapping her in the face with a cheeseburger,



Defense: That was not a cheeseburger ladies and gentlemen of the jury. It's Impossible!


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Posts: 15695 | Location: St. Charles, MO, USA | Registered: September 22, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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