Townhall.com
Kurt Schlichter
May 1, 2017


In the first 100 days since Felonia von Pantsuit was not inaugurated, the goofy collection of commie traitors, coastal snobs, and crack-pot weirdoes that hilariously styles itself “#TheResistance” has only managed to successfully resist success. Oh sure, they and the catamite media tried their darnedest but, as Yoda said, “Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.” And, as Yoda also said, “Chelsea Clinton is best Democrats can do, say you? Kidding me, you are.”

Yeah, after 100 days President Trump has reintroduced the world to Alpha America after eight years of Barack’s fussy betaism, gutted a Schumer-ton of regulations, and broke the Senate Democrats’ spirit by suckering them into a loser play that resulted in Justice Gorsuch today and, I hope, Justice Crazy Conservative Caveman to replace Justice Kennedy this summer. Plus, of course, his two greatest achievements – not being Hillary, and surviving even after being subjected to every slander, lie, and fake news report the gyno-hat left could throw at him.

Really, that #TheResistance could throw at us, because #TheResistance is not really resisting Trump as much as it is resisting us. The elite establishment is outraged that we normals have demanded to govern ourselves rather than begging for scraps from our betters in DC, NY and LA. It wasn’t just that horrible, sick old woman that we rejected; it was them. And by doing so, we “stole” what they see as their birthright to reign sovereign over us. They try to cover up their humiliation with tales of “Russians” and “hacking” because the truth is too painful to face. This election was about the people they sought to rule looking at them and their track record of failure and saying, “Nah, you suck.”

#TheResistance has got nothing. The kook caucus is now slow-walking its insistence that The Donald and Vlad were hanging out in hot tubs playing patty-cake because it became clear that the Obama White House had been spying on the Republicans knowing that they’d never be held to account with President Hillary in office. Oops. That worked out poorly; my advice to Ben Rhodes is, on your first day on the cellblock, take a swing at the biggest guy you can find.

#The Resistance is a mess. Now they’re reduced to fighting for supremacy in their final redoubt, the universities where their fascist intimidation and suppression of speech provides a glimpse of America as it would have been had Trump not been elected. That they are forced into a last-ditch effort to keep power in an institution where their control is total is proof positive of their weakness. And the fact that the only way they have a shot at succeeding is to actively work to silence the voices of non-idiocy is icing on the cake. Their goose-stepping antics on campus are providing America a preview of life under Democrats, and it’s not helping them.

Then there’s the cultural backlash, which is accomplishing … nothing. Polls show readers are less likely to trust the mainstream media than random emails from Nigerian princes. ESPN is dying, in no small part thanks to the campaign to throw tiresome progressive tropes into a network people turn to for some mindless sportsball. No one wants to see the next Keith Olbermann fulminating about “TRUMP’S TREASON!!!!!” between dwarf tosses on The Ocho.


And there is the interchangeable late night crowd whose predictable conformity to the anti-normal agenda has turned Johnny Carson’s former level playing field into a tiresome lefty echo chamber where viral clips of obscure hosts “destroying” Trump provide much needed erotic stimulus to liberal geeks who know not the loving touch of a living human.

The most hilarious part is the super-timely and relevant Handmaid’s Tale miniseries, a festival of imagined oppression porn designed to give frigid liberal women and their neutered male-identifying partners some much-needed bitter jollies. If you’ve never dated a college sophomore who got assigned that stupid book in her feminist lit seminar and now can’t shut up about it, this over-praised dystopian tome imagines a giant Christian conspiracy to create a gay-killing theocracy where women are slaves who are forced to cover their bodies and who are occasionally genitally mutilated. Sure, that scenario sounds familiar (Radical Islam), but I just can’t place it (Radical Islam). Oh, right – it’s totally Donald Trump’s agenda (Radical Islam).

By the way, the not-at-all out-of-touch Democrats responded to Trump’s election by appointing a radical Muslim leftist as second-in-command at the Democratic National Committee. Perhaps that’s part of their outreach program to nail down their support on college campuses, in Manhattan, and among the culturally suicidal. Way to recover Wisconsin, geniuses.


Again, this is the very best #TheResistance can do.

Now, everything is not perfect, but even those issues where Donald Trump has failed to attain his objectives (yet) are not that helpful to #TheResistance. Its “victories” don’t seem very victorious. They got some judge in Hawaii to (temporarily) stop Trump from excluding refugees from various jihadi-infused hellholes, thereby buying the Democrats the next massacre by one of these creeps. They got another judge to (temporarily) allow sanctuary cities to ignore the law, thereby buying the Democrats the next murder by a MS-13 creep. Way to go, Dems. You’re the party of importing Muslim fanatics and illegal alien gangbangers. See you in 2018!

The Democrats have stopped the repeal of Obamacare (temporarily), and have somehow convinced themselves that this will help them. Of course, because they think we’re dumb, they imagine we will forget that it’s called “Obamacare.” It’ll be nice to be rid of it, but not if the replacement is nearly as bad. Here’s the thing – the GOP alone could pass the Obamacare replacement, but it’s being held up by conservatives who want to make it more conservative. Wrap that around your head – for the first time in the history of ever, Republicans are blocking legislation for not being conservative enough. Briar, meet patch.


President Trump has a bunch of nominees pending for key jobs, and rumor has it that Never Trump infiltrators are slow-walking them to purposefully make him look bad. He should stop tolerating it, clean house, and demand his team perform. He could also be appointing judges faster, though rumor has it that a bunch of nominations are coming soon. They will sail through the Senate, and the federal courts will stop being the Democrat’s last gasp defense, all thanks to Harry Reid, who is currently back in Nevada living in a sex dungeon with his NordicTrack/dominatrix.

There’s no indication that the next 100 days, or the 100 days thereafter, will be any better for #TheResistance. It can fume and it can fuss, but slowly and steadily, the normal are winning. As Yoda might have said, “Pathetic you are, for win you do not, despite your media friends and your sex organ sombreros.”

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a Schumer-ton of regulations

Comedy gold right there!

quote:

Really, that #TheResistance could throw at us, because #TheResistance is not really resisting Trump as much as it is resisting us. The elite establishment is outraged that we normals have demanded to govern ourselves rather than begging for scraps from our betters in DC, NY and LA. It wasn’t just that horrible, sick old woman that we rejected; it was them. And by doing so, we “stole” what they see as their birthright to reign sovereign over us. They try to cover up their humiliation with tales of “Russians” and “hacking” because the truth is too painful to face. This election was about the people they sought to rule looking at them and their track record of failure and saying, “Nah, you suck.”

my favorite paragraph - nail meet screwdriver

quote:

Felonia von Pantsuit

BBBBWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHAHAHHAAAAAHAAHHHHhhhh....oh damn, I pissed myself laughing.

quote:

Originally posted by PHPaul:

quote:

a Schumer-ton of regulations

Comedy gold right there!

Yes! Yes it is. I laughed out loud when I read that. Full of great one liners and a great query. When is the administration going to start making some court nominations?

...liberal geeks who know not the touch of a living human being."

Killed me

He is always entertaining reading but I have to wonder when this was actually written? If after this latest budget legislation then I fear he may be doing himself some cred damage.

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The kook caucus

The man has a way with words. Along wt the others quoted, I like "The kook caucus..."