Since it's popularly known that men are the problem, according to liberals, snowflakes, etc, it's time to make men pay their fair share.

Time to tax peckers, dicks, weenies, tallywhackers, etc.

Let's just make whackyland feel warm and fuzzy and, well, just so progressive.

TO: All Male Taxpayers
FROM: California Department of Revenue

SUBJECT: Increased Tax Payment

Dear Taxpayer:


The only thing the California DOR has not taxed yet is your pecker.

This is due to the fact that:

(a) 40% of the time, it is hanging around unemployeed
(b) 30% of the time, it is pissed off.
(c) 20% of the time, it is hard up.
(d) 10% of the time, it is employed, but it operates in the hole.

Furthermore, it has two dependents, and they are both nuts.


Accordingly, after Jan 1, 2019, your pecker will be taxed, based on its size using the "Pecker-Checker Scale" below to determine your category.
Insert the additional tax under "other taxes", Page 2, Part 5, Line 51 of
your Standard Income Tax Return.


PECKER CHECKER SCALE
---------------------------------------
10-12 Inches....Luxury Tax......$12,000.00
8-10 Inches.....Poll Tax.............$9,500.00
5-8 Inches......Privilege Tax.....$6,900.00
4-5* Inches.....Nuisance Tax.......1,50000

*Note: Anyone under 4 inches is eligible for a refund.


DO NOT APPLY FOR AN EXTENSION!!!

Males with peckers in excess of 12 inches should file under "Capitol Gains."

even though this may never actually happen, it tells you where their thoughts and minds are going. It tells you there is truly no depths to how low they are willing to go to get your money

God I hope this doesn't happen. People will flee and contaminate the rest of the country.

Let me tell you how it will be
There's one for you, nineteen for me
Cause I'm the taxman
Yeah, I'm the taxman (yeah, I'm the taxman)

Should five per cent appear too small?
Be thankful I don't take it all
Cause I'm the taxman
Yeah, I'm the taxman (yeah, I'm the taxman)


(If you drive a car, car)
I'll tax the street
(If you try to sit, sit)
I'll tax your seat
(If you get too cold, cold)
I'll tax the heat
(If you take a walk, walk)
I'll tax your feet
Taxman

Cause I'm the taxman
Yeah, I'm the taxman (yeah, I'm the taxman)
Don't ask me what I want it for
(Ha, ha, Mr. Wilson)
If you don't want to pay some more
(Ha, ha, Mr. Heath)
Cause I'm the taxman
Yeah, I'm the taxman (yeah, I'm the taxman)

Now my advice for those who die
(Taxman!)
Declare the pennies on your eyes
(Taxman!)
Cause I'm the taxman
Yeah, I'm the taxman (yeah, I'm the taxman)
And you're working for no one but me (Taxman!)

Good Riddance to California and all the wack jobs that live there. They keep saying they want to succeed from the USA, well, I'm waiting for your Ass Holes to get the hell out of here...And on your way, take NJ, NY, DC, IL, CT, Maryland, Mass, and the rest of the liberal, progressive SHIT HOLES with you. Or better yet, let an earthquake break them off and let them sink into the ocean. No loss at all! Enough of these parasites.

Taxing free speech, lemme see.....Oh, wait Kontrolling Kalifornia Kommune, got it.

I saw a free rooster at the feed store, clean, quiet, one owner, free to ANY home.

When my wife told me about this, I said I think it’s a fantastic idea. Let all the idiots that continually vote for leftists leaders feel the sting in yet another area of their lives.

My question is, how will they accomplish it? If they are enlisting the aid of cellular carriers to collect the data, they won’t be doing it for free. A nice chunk of their “tax” money will go right into providers pockets. How about visitors from other states? If your cellular plan is opened in, say, Nevada, how will the state assess your “tax”?

I can see a lot of California hypocrites obtaining plans from outside the state, all while trumpeting what a great idea it is.

The company I work for is based in Kommifornia. I have to travel there once a year for the annual meeting.

At first, I enjoyed seeing the scenery. But I've seen it now, and I consider the week I have to spend there punishment.

You want a bag for that purchase? That will cost you. You want a drinking straw? Uh uh. Everything you buy has a cancer warning label on it. Everywhere you go it's "Stop," "Don't" "Pay," and "Don't.Even.Think.About.It."

From the moment of my arrival I'm already looking to my departure.

Time to invest in a cell phone franchise in Reno.

quote:

Originally posted by fpuhan:
The company I work for is based in Kommifornia. I have to travel there once a year for the annual meeting.

At first, I enjoyed seeing the scenery. But I've seen it now, and I consider the week I have to spend there punishment.

You want a bag for that purchase? That will cost you. You want a drinking straw? Uh uh. Everything you buy has a cancer warning label on it. Everywhere you go it's "Stop," "Don't" "Pay," and "Don't.Even.Think.About.It."

From the moment of my arrival I'm already looking to my departure.

Yup, same exact experience myself. One of my offices is in SoCal and while I used to enjoy going there, now I’m very happy to leave. I have a running joke that you probably can’t get through a single day in California without unknowingly breaking some crazy law. And yes, EVERYTHING has a warning on it. I’ve even noticed now that many of the companies outside of Cali that I purchase online from have a disclaimers on product pages stating “California says this is harmful, California says this contains cancerous stuff, California says this product can kill unicorns.” It’s insane.

It would be interesting to see how they would implement this tax.

quote:

Originally posted by SpinZone:
It would be interesting to see how they would implement this tax.

If they succeed in implementing the tax, they will have to involve virtually every carrier that does business in the state. All of these businesses would have to impose the tax on residents and the equivalent of a roaming fee to outsiders.

I don’t believe that it will ever happen- logistically, it will be a nightmare, but if it gets off the ground I cannot wait for the lawsuits to begin. Think of all the people living just across state lines that will be taxed by virtue of signal bleed. Commiefirnia will lose more in litigation than they will take in.

Come to think of it, when I drive on I-8 between Yuma and San Diego, I used to get a text from Verizon that int'l. roaming now applies because I'm so close to the Mexican border, that they can't tell that I'm still in the US. So the technology is there if they want to implement this.

quote:

Originally posted by Black92LX:

quote:

Charges may also be applied retroactively to messages sent in the past five years

RETROACTIVE FOR 5 YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

These people are absolutely out of control.

This is the real kicker right here...the basic premise is stupid, but that's par for the course for CA. But to try and retroactively tax something...how is that even legal?!?!?! There would be a mob at the statehouse with torches and pitchforks if the legislature suggested something like that around here.. or at least, I'd hope there would be.

CA can screw itself. I'm basically not caring anymore - I'll be out shortly; sooner the better.

The only reason I don't like this is that it may drive left leaning looney liberals to invade more conservative areas where I would like to end up.

For the loonies that will remain in CA despite all this - more power to ya. Knock yourselves insane.

quote:

Originally posted by 92fstech:

quote:

Originally posted by Black92LX:

quote:

Charges may also be applied retroactively to messages sent in the past five years

RETROACTIVE FOR 5 YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

These people are absolutely out of control.

This is the real kicker right here...the basic premise is stupid, but that's par for the course for CA. But to try and retroactively tax something...how is that even legal?!?!?! There would be a mob at the statehouse with torches and pitchforks if the legislature suggested something like that around here.. or at least, I'd hope there would be.

Didn’t California Retroactively tax Gunsmiths as gun manufacturers? Didn’t this “help” Bruce out of Sacramento? I thought it effectively put all gunsmiths out of business by classifying (and Retroactively taxing) them as gun manufacturers.

1,800 companies left Kali, many headed to Texas

This is why my state is turning purple!!

that's how we know that the left are insane.

They leave blue states because of blue policies and taxes. But then vote for the same shit in Red states that made them leave the blue state in the first place..... Insane - QED.

quote:

Originally posted by konata88:
that's how we know that the left are insane.

They leave blue states because of blue policies and taxes. But then vote for the same shit in Red states that made them leave the blue state in the first place..... Insane - QED.

Not unique to kalifornistan! We got the same shit here in Virginia.

Assholes in MD screwed up the state to the point they could not stand it anymore, moved from there to Northern VA, and promptly started doing it all over again!! How can so many idiot liberals survive when they seem to be too stupid to breathe on their own?

I shudder the think of what is happening to Idaho with all those commie bastards migrating there from the 3 western states. Oregon, Wash, Kali.

Years ago, when my brother was still and active cop, he was telling us about how many Kali cops had retired and moved to Idaho to get away from the stupidity in Kali.

“Following a new FCC ruling, the California Public Utilities Commission has ditched its planned 2019 vote on taxing text messaging…”

https://mol.im/a/6502367