I have never read GQ, maybe because they are Commie Bastards.



It's Your Civic Duty to Ruin Thanksgiving by Bringing Up Trump

BY JOE BERKOWITZ

This Turkey Day, consider making life HELL for a few of your relatives.

It’s late-November 2017, and you know what that means: Every man you’ve ever seen on TV for any reason has just been unmasked as a woman-hating sewer ghoul. Also, it’s time to ruin your Trump-supporting family’s Thanksgiving—for America!
Thanksgiving is a celebration of community and gratitude, where we reconvene in our nostalgia-drenched hometowns and perform time-honored traditions such as almost sleeping with your high school crush and going around the table to say what you’re most thankful for and where you were on 9/11. Last year’s Thanksgiving was a difficult time for most Americans—roughly 65.8 million of us. The election was still a fresh wound. Trump had begun assembling his Dr. Caligari cabinet of White House monsters, each one a direct fuck-you to some beloved ideal. There was the EPA chief who doesn’t believe in climate change, the labor secretary who opposed minimum wage increases, the flagrantly Islamophobic National Security Adviser who might just be a foreign agent, and at the helm of it all, a man who speaks almost exclusively in racist dog whistles and “locker room talk.” Thanksgiving was a cathartic vent sesh for liberals with like-minded families, and a painful twist of the knife for those without.
I was lucky, kind of. Both my family and my wife’s family were Hillary supporters. But we spent Thanksgiving 2016 at my parents’ house in Asheville, North Carolina—a city which, despite its Portlandia-esque sensibilities, was nestled in deep red territory. Walking around downtown, I saw more sentient MAGA hats in a few hours than I had in three long post-election weeks in New York. Right away, my dad informed me that some Trump supporter friends would be joining our Thanksgiving dinner. He assured me he’d politely asked them not to talk politics, and encouraged me to follow suit. I spent Thanksgiving dinner trying to guess which guests were the ones who voted for Trump, like the most embarrassing Agatha Christie mystery of all time. This armistice dinner went surprisingly smoothly, thanks to the politics ban and enough whiskey to ride out a prohibition crisis. It helped that these people were not my family. Whatever qualms I had with them outside of this holodeck simulation of a normal dinner would never come to a head, since we had no reason to be in regular contact. Also, Trump had not actually taken office yet.
Last year, Trump supporters could still make a case for impending change. Perhaps Donald would go through a molting phase, shedding his most intolerant and unstable parts like clumps of dead lizard skin. Instead, if anything, his reptilian hide got doused in nuclear waste and he has since Godzilla’d all over America’s purple mountain majesties. Anyone hoping for peace last Thanksgiving was rewarded with constant chaos, “very fine” Nazis marching in the streets, and a flame war with North Korea unfolding entirely over Twitter, which may or may not end in Armageddon.
This year, if you’re headed home to a household that still thinks a sex-offending game show host in rapid cognitive decline was the best choice for a president, it is your civic duty to filibuster Thanksgiving.

Trump has spent the entire year performing one long, clumsy touchdown dance atop the wreckage of America’s former norms and values. He turned the presidency into a haberdashery. He made nepotism a core hiring strategy. He attacked a civil rights leader during Martin Luther King Day. He politicized a Boy Scout jamboree. Any parents still riding the Trump Train at this point have thereby signaled that nothing is sacred. It is time to follow their example. They can’t stand idly by while President Deals tramples every other American tradition and yet somehow expect that Thanksgiving will be normal too. If every other moment of this year is going to be drastically out of whack, nobody should get to pretend that everything is normal for one meal just because that’s what the pilgrims would have done.

Here are a few suggestions for how to ruin Thanksgiving, arranged by ascending order of righteous fury:
TRENDING THIS VERY SECOND

Don’t show up. For some parents, your absence will speak louder than any sodden arguments over the density of pumpkin pie. If you can’t even look them in the eye, they’ll know you mean business. Besides, Friendsgiving rules.
Show up and be kind of an asshole. No hugs; only stiff, formal handshakes. During the football game, talk about police brutality nonstop. Take any opportunity to emphasize just how much Bruce Springsteen and the entire E Street band loathes Trump. Come out as an aspiring professional DJ.
Scorched Earth. Not even a handshake; just stare, disgustedly, at their outstretched arms. Build a wall out of mashed potatoes. During the football game, order 10 Papa John’s pizzas—the official foodstuff of the alt right—and use them as pie charts to demonstrate who benefits most from the GOP tax plan. Refuse to be alone in a room with your mom, citing the Mike Pence rule. Call your parents by a Donald Trump nickname of your choosing—perhaps Little Rocket Mom or Liddle’ Dad. Insist on setting a place for Robert Mueller, the way Jews do for Elijah on Passover. Wear a coal miner hat for solidarity. Punch a cornucopia right in the mouth.
Of course, this is about more than just spite—as satisfying as spite can be in these trying times. This is about potentially chipping away at the ~35 percent of un-budging Trump supporters. Sure, some of them are fully on board with every inexplicable decision, but others may be swayable. They are Fox News devotees who have simply internalized the message that all negative news about Trump is fake news. They know the president is unpopular, but they think his unpopularity is the strict province of haters and losers. It might be different when it’s their own child—who probably isn’t an Antifa supersoldier and who definitely doesn’t have loser genes—weighing in with cold hard facts. Having a son or daughter loathe everything you’ve become is easier long distance; it’s another thing when that kid is staring turkey-carving daggers at you from across the table.
If your family is unmoved after a ruined Thanksgiving, though, that’s fine too. After all, next year’s Thanksgiving falls just after the 2018 midterms, and if your true believer parents still feel the way they do now, you might ruin their holiday in another way.


Oops forgot link.
https://www.gq.com/story/the-c...ruining-thanksgiving

This message has been edited. Last edited by: phydough,

Jesus, that publication is simply terrible.

Not that I doubt it but can we get a link?
I really don't feel like crawling through the GQ site in search of this.

They’ve forgotten what the first word in their name means

quote:

Originally posted by Kenpoist:
They’ve forgotten what the first word in their name means

Indeed.

The best thing about Thanksgiving is it's basic, apolitical, non Hallmark-esque, nature.

Food, Fellowship, and Thankfulness...

It couldn't be more simple and good.

Best holiday ever.

Fucking that up over politics ought to be a floggable offense.

These are the same cocksuckers that pronounced that Colin Kapernick fucking piece of shit as man of the year.

Fuck all these people.

quote:

Originally posted by chongosuerte:
These are the same cocksuckers that pronounced that Colin Kapernick fucking piece of shit as man of the year.

Fuck all these people.

To nitpick, Knappyprick was awarded "Citizen of the Year". Back in the day when magazines were main sources of niche information, the racks were filled with all sorts of stuff. Even then - I'm talking forty years ago - GQ stood out as a subersive piece of shit. I'm not old enough to remember when it might have actually been targeting gentlemen.

Sorry, I forgot to add the link initially. Now added to bottom of the OP.

Just fucking morons.

I'd say it is GQ's and the rest of the left who's Thanksgiving is already ruined. I am quite happy and thankful for President Trump - and it is going to be a great day for me.

Does this anger mean they are finally moving to the next stage?

quote:

Having a son or daughter loathe everything you’ve become is easier long distance

Because you're out of range of The Ass Kicking you so richly deserve?

Ruin a family holiday to stroke your sad, egotistical life. What a fucking douche!

Fools like this are the same ones that were trying to get people to talk obamacare to their families at Thinksgiving/Christmas.

quote:

Originally posted by Ripley:

quote:

Originally posted by chongosuerte:
These are the same cocksuckers that pronounced that Colin Kapernick fucking piece of shit as man of the year.

Fuck all these people.

To nitpick, Knappyprick was awarded "Citizen of the Year".

Yeah, "Citizen of the Year." To a man who admittedly has never voted. Pure trash.

Let’s not lose sight of what’s really important folks! On page 69 the unveiling of Tommy Hilfiger’s 2018 line for Summer! Ooooh, I can’t wait!
If this is what my kid read while on the crapper we probably wouldn’t have anything to talk about anyway.

Instead ruin a SJWs dinner... Upon entry into the home (if for some reason you must admit them) announce Happy Trumpsgiving and give them a MAGA hat to wear. Then announce how you and your white privilege have thoughtfully killed and roasted a large bird thanks to the NRA and the 2nd amendment and your AR. Then while giving thanks to God, clutching your bible and your gun, and regailing them with stories about white Pilgrims coming to this land, have your one other liberal creepy family member feeling their ass the whole time, which is OK, because he is a lib and feels bad about it and promises to change.

Have Play Doh and coloring books in the basement as a safe space for them, set up on a card table just under the deer head.

If somehow they haven't run out crying and flapping their arms after all this, announce instead of watching the football game this year we will be watching the taped inauguration of Trump and discussing which of his tweets are your favorites.

I promise I can ruin their day far easier than they can ruin mine

There is something we can take away from this. Call it another thing to be thankful for, that such flaming douchebags as this don't reflect most of the country.

Are there really people whose identity is so wrapped up in politics that it coms before God, family, and country? What a terrible way to live, with yourself at the center of the universe.

I hope this doesn't ruin your Thanksgiving...

FUCK THEM

Yes, there are many. They're pushed family away so all they have left are friends that share their political beliefs, which supplants religion, family, and all else in their lives. They are miserable and will die alone, most likely. I know several. The most vocal and stupid works every holiday to avoid being with his family. Matter of fact, I have him working right now, a 12 hour shift.

quote:

Originally posted by DaveL:
Are there really people whose identity is so wrapped up in politics that it coms before God, family, and country? What a terrible way to live, with yourself at the center of the universe.

Yes, because liberals don't believe in God, they are trying to destroy the family, and they hate the USA. They have nothing except their own deranged thoughts to propel them.