1. Ensure your complaint is vague and anonymous; suggestions like "your new websight sucks" with no way to get more information from you is extremely helpful feedback for future updates.

2. Grammar and punctuation is inefficient, if you don't use any your feedback will be processed quicker.

3. Complain about "new" features and functions that have remained unchained since the original release 4 years ago. Researching your complaint will waste a lot of time and helps support staff get through the day.

4. Delete the 18+ prior notifications regarding the update, and never ever read any documentation. This way you can claim we never notified you the update was occurring. Be sure to claim this repeatedly, you will be shown sympathy if you didn't know the update was occurring.

5. Deny the existence of mobile apps and vigorously assert that your iPhone 4 is the optimal size for using complex web based applications.

6. Be sure to tell IT that you know what you're talking about because you have an MIS degree. Definitely also tell us about the inventory program you created one time in your programming elective in Coldfusion 5. Your feedback about the color gradient used in the latest release will only be taken seriously if you establish cred.

7. Zoom your browser to 300%+, that way you can legitimately bitch about how terrible the new layout is.

8. Bust out your old school eMachine and make sure the site works on it. When it doesn't, email the board of directors. They love to hear from Netscape users, it makes them feel young.

9. Call in and blame problems with an unrelated system on the recent upgrade. Ignore all logical responses about these systems being unrelated, after all it stopped working sometime around the update and correlation always equals causation.

10. Email the CEO about what a terrible job he's doing because the application is now a slightly different shade of blue. CEOs think they can do anything and need to be taken down a peg from time to time.

We must work for the same company.

But does the search feature work?

But seriously, I think right now web designers are too busy trying to make something look cool that they forget to display the information that the user came to see. Or it gets buried in 'cool' graphic displays that kill bandwidth or data for mobile users.

Hmmm... my users never had those complaints. They were so absolutely stunned with the awesomeness of my releases that they couldn't wait to bow down before me in humility and devotion.

NOT!

quote:

Originally posted by Whisp:
after all it stopped working sometime around the update and correlation always equals causation.

I used to come in to work at 4:00am to do major upgrades, for just this reason. I never told anyone I had done the upgrade, except my immediate supervisor, and everything was peachy. Later in my career, when I had to pre-announce any planned upgrades, the tech support hotline was always flooded with the correlation/causation type of complaint.
 

Ah heck, as long as this release fixed more old bugs than it created new ones, life is good. Testing is for wimps - Why the heck do you think we have (L)users?

Why is the system offline!!!!

HEY!

I like netscape.