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Subaru Drivers

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August 28, 2019, 03:55 AM
2000Z-71
Subaru Drivers
Asking the question I’m sure every Alaskan who’s driven the Seward Highway has, why are Subaru drivers such assholes?

I mean do they think they’ve been granted Indulgences by the Pope himself that they are exempt from the, “Slower Traffic Keep Right” signs? Have they anointed themselves the Vicar of Carbon Emissions by forcing everyone to drive 5-10mph less than the speed limit? Or in words their liberal arts degreed minds will understand, do they think they get a get out of Hell free card by subjecting the rest of us to the Hell of having to follow them?

Just because their 4 cylinder shit box loaded down with kayaks and mountain bikes worth more than their car that is held together with duct tape, bungee cords and bumper stickers for social and environmental causes can’t maintain 65mph going up the hill from the Sterling Highway junction why should I be forced to conform with their vision of social and vehicular justice and equality?

I’m sorry but if they pedal through 3 passing lanes and don’t move to the right, I should be able to invoke the spirit of No. 3, the Intimidator, the late great Dale Earnhardt, get on their rear bumper, take a little air off the spoiler, get em’ lose and turn their station wagon loved by lesbians into the wall, or the guardrail, or the ditch…

Earth First! We’ll drill the other planets for oil later…




My daughter can deflate your daughter's soccer ball.
August 28, 2019, 05:13 AM
RichardC
What were you driving at the time?


____________________
August 28, 2019, 05:20 AM
BurtonRW
Is that area remote enough that there just might be nobody around to witness any unfortunate accidents that might happen?

-Rob




I predict that there will be many suggestions and statements about the law made here, and some of them will be spectacularly wrong. - jhe888

A=A
August 28, 2019, 07:04 AM
Leemur
Around here they all think they’re filming another Fast n Furious movie.
August 28, 2019, 07:14 AM
BurtonRW
quote:
Originally posted by Leemur:
Around here they all think they’re filming another Fast n Furious movie.


I'm curious... are you talking Outbacks and Foresters, or just the BRZs (which almost don't really count as Subies, IMO).

-Rob




I predict that there will be many suggestions and statements about the law made here, and some of them will be spectacularly wrong. - jhe888

A=A
August 28, 2019, 08:02 AM
h2oys
I guess I'm really bad because we have both a BMW and a Subaru Wink
August 28, 2019, 08:03 AM
2000Z-71
quote:
Originally posted by BurtonRW:
quote:
Originally posted by Leemur:
Around here they all think they’re filming another Fast n Furious movie.


I'm curious... are you talking Outbacks and Foresters, or just the BRZs (which almost don't really count as Subies, IMO).

-Rob

You forgot about the WRX.




My daughter can deflate your daughter's soccer ball.
August 28, 2019, 08:24 AM
Perception
quote:
Originally posted by Leemur:
Around here they all think they’re filming another Fast n Furious movie.


I wish, that would be so much better.




"The people hate the lizards and the lizards rule the people."
"Odd," said Arthur, "I thought you said it was a democracy."
"I did," said Ford, "it is."
"So," said Arthur, hoping he wasn't sounding ridiculously obtuse, "why don't the people get rid of the lizards?"
"It honestly doesn't occur to them. They've all got the vote, so they all pretty much assume that the government they've voted in more or less approximates the government they want."
"You mean they actually vote for the lizards."
"Oh yes," said Ford with a shrug, "of course."
"But," said Arthur, going for the big one again, "why?"
"Because if they didn't vote for a lizard, then the wrong lizard might get in."
August 28, 2019, 09:06 AM
Leemur
quote:
Originally posted by BurtonRW:
quote:
Originally posted by Leemur:
Around here they all think they’re filming another Fast n Furious movie.


I'm curious... are you talking Outbacks and Foresters, or just the BRZs (which almost don't really count as Subies, IMO).

-Rob


If it’s a Subaru there’s a 99% chance of them thinking they’re making one of those damn movies.
August 28, 2019, 09:20 AM
mcrimm
The little shitboxs are everywhere in liberal NW Montana. We call them "Grocery Getters" There's a real level of arrogance in these drivers.

I'll admit, I owned on once. It was the biggest pile of horse dung I owned out of about 35 cars, trucks and SUVs.



I'm sorry if I hurt you feelings when I called you stupid - I thought you already knew - Unknown
...................................
When you have no future, you live in the past. " Sycamore Row" by John Grisham
August 28, 2019, 09:35 AM
flesheatingvirus
quote:
Originally posted by 2000Z-71:
quote:
Originally posted by BurtonRW:
quote:
Originally posted by Leemur:
Around here they all think they’re filming another Fast n Furious movie.


I'm curious... are you talking Outbacks and Foresters, or just the BRZs (which almost don't really count as Subies, IMO).

-Rob

You forgot about the WRX.


Yep. My coworker recently acquired a turbo-charged STI. He routinely hits 100+ on the straightaways near work. I wasn't happy when he did that with me in the passenger seat. I don't think the BRZs have the balls to get going that fast. Wink


________________________________________

-- Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past me I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. --
August 28, 2019, 09:37 AM
Prefontaine
There are just a few Subaru's with turbochargers now. The WRX/STi, the 2020 Outback has a 2.4L DIT option (most elect for the cheaper n/a 4 banger), as does the Legacy but just like the OB, most go the cheap route. Subaru's normally aspirated engines are gutless with low hp and tq, so if they are in a fast lane, or anyplace some solid power is necessary, best of luck, you'll have to try to get around them.



What am I doing? I'm talking to an empty telephone
August 28, 2019, 11:12 AM
frayedends
I have a Crosstrek and often have 2 kayaks on top. If you are in the left lane and not going 80 or better I’ll be tailgating your ass. Move over slowpoke.




These go to eleven.
August 28, 2019, 01:33 PM
LS1 GTO
Alaska or Boulder CO? Wink







Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.



Only in an insane world are the sane considered insane.


The memories of a man in his old age
Are the deeds of a man in his prime


August 28, 2019, 01:55 PM
Krazeehorse
I drive ours rather aggressively but I do have to admit that I have some lesbian traits. Big Grin


_____________________

Be careful what you tolerate. You are teaching people how to treat you.
August 28, 2019, 04:19 PM
YooperSigs
Here in the Yoop, The Subaru is issued to Millennials. Each is equipped a big plastic roof box and Kayak. Or Fat Tire Bike.
A "Coexist" sticker is included.


End of Earth: 2 Miles
Upper Peninsula: 4 Miles
August 28, 2019, 09:32 PM
Bassamatic
This shouldn't surprise you. Look at their commercials. They love everybody. Their favorite song is "I'd like to buy the world a coke" and they drive grandma up into the mountains so she can hug a tree.

You couldn't give me one after all that.



.....never marry a woman who is mean to your waitress.
August 28, 2019, 09:34 PM
SevenPlusOne
Their goddamn headgaskets are probably leaking so bad their engine is overheating.



"Ninja kick the damn rabbit"
August 29, 2019, 03:01 AM
PowerSurge
Around here their drivers clog up the roads. Then when you try to pass they speed up. Thankfully most of them are slow so it’s no problem.


———————————————
The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. Psalm 14:1
August 29, 2019, 06:33 AM
egregore
Subaru owners don't seem to drive badly around here, but many of them (the cars) are festooned with Hillary, Bernie, one Jill Stein and "Coexist" stickers.