|Jack of All Trades, |
Master of Nothing
HR is neither human or a resource.
Job hunting right now and I've had a verbal offer for over 2 weeks now and waiting on official paperwork. Several phone calls with HR and have been assured it's all been processed. Called their relocation manager today and he's absolutely furious. I have a fairly common first and last name, it seems HR got me confused with another person with my same name and has been sending all correspondence to my doppleganger in Guam!
My daughter can deflate your daughter's soccer ball.
Look on the bright side: at least they still want you for the job or they wouldn’t be communicating with your doppelgänger!
I just hope the doppelganger doesn't accept your job offer.
I would like to apologize to anyone I have *not* offended. Please be patient. I will get to you shortly.
|On the DL|
Don't take the job in Guam. It won't be long before it tips over.
A mind is a terrible thing.
|Drill Here, Drill Now|
Congrats on the new job.
I've posted before that I've encountered a few good HR people over the years, but the supermajority apparently weren't ambitious or smart enough to work for the TSA.
Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity
DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer.
Attention to detail seems to be on vacation here. Prior to the internet you spoke with someone on the phone and it did not take long to tell the level of competency. The company clearly delegated the task to an idiot. I am encountering much more of this when I receive emails with !!! and misspelled words. Made up words such as "outreached" seem common as well.
The boss said "Please refrain from putting profanity in your thread titles."
I think "HR" is quite profane.
|Three Generations |
Be careful when following the masses. Sometimes the M is silent.
HR where I work is two diversity hires. One can barely move and the other only cares about you if you speak Spanish.
|Unapologetic Old |
HR is the bane of business in America
- "This town reminds me of something in the bible."
- "Which part?"
- "The part right before god gets angry"
I refer to HR as useless resources but they are truly worse than that.
HR = Human Retard
I speak jive.
One of my criteria for deciding whether or not I'll work for a given company has become whether or not they even have an HR department. Most of the time I'm able to avoid companies who have one at all. It's fantastic when it works out that way.
I will offer a somewhat different opinion/perspective, after being in a leadership position for the last couple years and having led between 5 and 200 resources I have concluded that HR is only there to prevent the company from being harmed. I have had and have a great relationship with my HR people, we talk weekly, due to me remembering that they are no there for me but the company.
That being said....and I may have been lucky, my HR people have been great, hell one was a damned near therapist....I would outline the issues with my resources and then she would ask "how is Mike doing". Since I was away from my family and literally building a market I would answer..."shitty but that's the gig".
She also stepped up and pushed hard for a contractor to be released in our mother company.....
he was a totally POS. That was not easy....
Anyway, HR is not so bad and as long as you remember their real responsibilities and that is they are human you will get along fine.
|His Royal Hiney|
Oh, shit! And they're even paying his relocation expenses plus temporary hotel here for six months. Maybe you can ask for the same amount as a sign-on bonus addition.
"It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly. Our answer must consist not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual." Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning, 1946.
I tested my HR by filling a report against an Indian manager who had a penchant for referring to white people as "honky" (he thought it was funny) and then took to screaming at me in meetings, then blaming me for his behavior, and the last straw was another screaming fit in front of my entire team and director, after which he left the room and pouted for a long time.
I told the Director more than once - fix it - I will never be screamed at over a trivial issue in front of my peers again.
After it happened the last time, during a TEAM BUILDING event week, it all went to HR.
After 2 months of investigation, HR decided to just have me work for the Director with the manager as a peer again (like it was before he got promoted). Then I proceeded to get the silent treatment from the Indian for an entire year. Not even looking at me or acknowledging my presence or any communication, unless it was in a meeting or if someone above him would see it.
Why did I go to HR (first time ever in my career)? Because the company talks so much about how awesome they are at diversity and not tolerating harassment or disrespect of employees for any reason, and no racist words of any kind from any person to any person, blah, blah, blah.
He got a promotion to Director and left the group. So I don't have to put up with him anymore. But seems none of the "policy" matters unless you have legal standing to take action. And I'm just a 46 year old white guy.
GUAM:. Give Up And Masterbate.
|Too old to run, |
too mean to quit!
I had "experiences" with HR when I was managing 5 departments for IBM, lo those many years ago.
A peer manager was having serious problems with the quality of product coming out of his department. Took 3 weeks to determine the cause was sabotage by a black female working on the production line. She actually intentionally damaged a $50,000 part used to manufacture micro-circuit modules.
He asked us peer managers how he should handle it, and after determining that he had "counseled" her several time (all documented) for various problems. I suggested that he should fire her. 2nd line manager agreed, so the idiot was fired. HR intervened and said that she could not be fired because the last 2 people fired were also black. Note there were some 16,000 employees working at the plant.
Finally, the subject came up, again, in the management meeting. Discussion ended when I said that I would remind HR that they were there to help management, not tell them how to do the damned job. Tell them the idiot was fired and if they didn't like that they should transfer her to HR. He did, and she was gone that day.
There has never been an occasion where a people gave up their weapons in the interest of peace that didn't end in their massacre. (Louis L'Amour)
"To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical. "
"America is great because she is good. If America ceases to be good, America will cease to be great." Alexis de Tocqueville
The Idaho Elk Hunter
Back when I worked for a megacorp, I had an opening for another attorney in my group. HR kept sending me resumes for non-lawyers.
I called our HR rep and patiently explained that an essential qualification for an attorney position was that the candidate be a licensed attorney. That call was a waste of time as they kept sending me resumes for non-lawyers.
I finally found someone on my own.
NRA Endowment Life Member; ISRA Member
“The Left want to be our shepherds. But that requires us to be sheep.” ― Thomas Sowell
HR's cause good employees to get fired over bs and trouble makers work for years. Many ppl have had their lives wrecked by the facts Being ignored so a perceived issue could rule.
Just like the bs happening now with this witch hunt on men by women who claim not to be sexual beings.
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