Ha! I think this exact topic was my first post ever in this section of the forum.
I agree with you. I won’t ask my guests to remove their shoes, especially if it’s for a holiday or get together. I invited you, I’m not going to ask you to remove articles of clothing unless we’re planning on having an orgy later.
Normally, we have a loose rule of not wearing shoes in the house, but not super strict...that’s why we clean the floors every week.
But like you, I really don’t like taking my shoes off in other people’s homes as a guest.
Posts: 6851 | Location: Derby City | Registered: September 08, 2005
Our guests have always asked, and we've always responded it's their choice, but we prefer it. Everybody always has.
We're respectful of our guests' predilections. They, in turn, are respectful of ours.
"America is at that awkward stage. It's too late to work within the system,,,, but too early to shoot the bastards." -- Claire Wolfe "If we let things terrify us, life will not be worth living." -- Seneca the Younger, Roman Stoic philosopher "The dominant media is no more ``mainstream`` than leftists are liberals." -- me
Asking me to remove my shoes is a guarantee that this visit is my last to your house. I would never ask anyone to take off their shoes in my house, in fact please keep your shoes on for the entirety of your visit in my home unless you are spending the night.
Sic Semper Tyrannis
Posts: 17311 | Location: Loudoun County, Virginia | Registered: December 27, 2014
The Christmas hosting inlaws are farmers and it's hard to keep things clean on the farm so I see their point. Still, I show up with clean shoes and keep them on as do some others. I've never seen anyone track up the house and don't expect anyone to. You can be respectful on your terms.
Set the controls for the heart of the Sun.
Posts: 6292 | Location: Flown-over country | Registered: December 25, 2008
Originally posted by frayedends: I gladly remove my shoes when asked. Respecting other's property when invited in is important to me. Be a gracious guest and remove your shoes.
Exactly. I have no problem taking off my boots when asked if I go to someone's house. I don't mind if people wear shoes or boots in my house because the whole downstairs is linoleum. Upstairs is carpeted. If someone goes upstairs, shoes off. My bedroom and bathroom are upstairs and I don't want to step in wet. Only time I ask is if it's snowy outside. Floors downstairs get a bit slippery with water on them.
I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not.
Posts: 2638 | Location: The armpit of Ohio | Registered: August 18, 2013
Coming from an Asian backround, our family always removed shoes when inside. It was natural for us, a reflex. But we never insisted our guests do so. If you want to, fine, but if not, also fine. I usually keep my shoes on when visiting a non-Asian household.
I'm generally pretty amenable to requests like this, but there's one couple that solved that problem for me. One of them is extremely proud of being part Japanese, to the point where they insist all guests remove their shoes at the door. I get the reasons that this practice developed in Japan in feudal society. It's an entirely different situation and set of factors in society today... and I discovered when we were leaving their house after their last social gathering that some asshole had stepped on and smooshed one of my shoes.
We don't go over there anymore. If I gotta take my shoes off, I can kindly excuse myself at the door, or even at the curb, and ask what time my wife and son would like to be picked up.
Many years ago, my first wife and I had just bought a newly built house right before Thanksgiving. She cooked a big dinner for her family, and her dad shows up right out of the deer blind with red mud all over his boots.
He got pissed and left when I asked him to leave his boots in the mudroom. Granted, I didn't ask anyone else to remove their shoes, but no one else had red mud caked on them.
Originally posted by Todd Huffman: He got pissed and left when I asked him to leave his boots in the mudroom. Granted, I didn't ask anyone else to remove their shoes, but no one else had red mud caked on them.
See, but that's a mud room, and that's what it's for. That's a whole other set of circumstances. When I lived in snow country, it was understood that you ditch your icy, slushy outerwear in the mudroom. That means boots, too. Doing so in that scenario never has, never would bother me much.
I grew up with a house in the Upper Midwest that was carpeted in every room except the kitchen and entrance. Therefore, I was raised to take off my shoes. It was year around too because we were backed up to a state game forest so our shoes were dirty in the summer and we played outdoors in the winter.
When I lived in houses with carpet (e.g. Alaska), I asked people to take their shoes off in the winter. Even in Calgary with all hard woods on the main level I asked people to take their shoes off because I didn't want to step in a wet spot, but I did have clean pairs of traction socks to give people.
Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity
DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer.
Posts: 19288 | Location: N. Houston, TX | Registered: November 14, 2005