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Question: What goes "13, 14, 15, ..." Really Loud? Login/Join 
Member
Picture of SIG 229R
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I heard this one lately.
I saw a sign at a check out that read NO CHECKS ACCEPTED, I casually said next thing you know there will be one saying NO CASH ACCEPTED, the checker said there were already places that if your bill came to $18.10 and you gave them a twenty dollar bill then they would charge you a full $19.00 for the item since they didn't keep any change.


SigP229R
Harry Callahan "A man has got to know his limitations".
Teddy Roosevelt "Talk soft carry a big stick"
I Cor10: 13 "1611KJV"
 
Posts: 5835 | Location: 35 59'19"N 79 58'33"W | Registered: March 04, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Savor the limelight
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How does one count BOGO items, buy two get one or 6 limes for a dollar?
 
Posts: 3322 | Location: SWFL | Registered: October 10, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Don't Panic
Picture of joel9507
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quote:
Originally posted by PHPaul:
quote:
Originally posted by V-Tail:
quote:
Originally posted by PHPaul:
Curious: How does one count items?

Bread, milk, yogurt. 3 Items, right?

One loaf of bread, 1 quart of milk, a dozen individual servings of yogurt. 3 items or 14?
Carton of eggs = 12 items. No fast lane for you.


Good God! No WONDER I got such dirty looks checking out with a bag of Reeses Pieces! Big Grin

Heyyyyy...was that bread one loaf or sliced? That's a lot of items, right there!

Busted!

The line in Cambridge checkouts when miscreants went astray into the express lines went like this - pointing at the sign, the cashiers would say 'Are you from MIT and can't read, or from Harvard and can't count?" Smile
 
Posts: 11643 | Location: North Carolina | Registered: October 15, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Purveyor of
Fine Avatars
Picture of Orguss
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When I was a checker, I'd get pissed while working the express lane watching someone unloading more than the limit. But the reality was that it would always be faster for me to ring the person up and get them out with a mild admonishment at the end than force them to repack all their stuff in the cart and move it.



"I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Hollywood and Madison Avenue, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you're old and weak!" - Calvin, "Calvin & Hobbes"
 
Posts: 14838 | Location: Sonoma County, CA | Registered: April 09, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of LimaCharlie
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I was in a regular checkout line at the grocery store on a Friday evening that was packed. There were several people in each line.

A guy in front of me was checking out and handed the checker a coupon. The coupon was for $10.00 off of $50.00 or more. His total came to around $46.00. He argued with the checker that it was close enough. The checker kept telling him he couldn't override the computer.

The guy then says he will go find something to reach $50.00. As he brushes past me I said, "Really?". He took two or three minutes to find an item to put him over the limit.

On the way back through the line, he bumped me hard. I just smiled at him, remembering the 1911 on my hip. He used his outside voice to finish checking out. Too bad it is against the law to kill people.


U.S. Army, Retired
 
Posts: 3467 | Location: Northwest Oregon | Registered: June 12, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
On the DL
Picture of V-Tail
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quote:
Originally posted by LimaCharlie:
Too bad it is against the law to kill people.
You are not allowed to shoot them.

You are not allowed to shoot them.

You are not allowed to shoot them.

You are not allowed to shoot them.

You are not allowed to shoot them.

You are not allowed to shoot them.

You are not allowed to shoot them.

You are not allowed to shoot them.

You are not allowed to shoot them.



A mind is a terrible thing.
 
Posts: 16478 | Location: Central Florida (near Orlando) | Registered: January 03, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of Perception
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quote:
Originally posted by PHPaul:
Curious: How does one count items?

Bread, milk, yogurt. 3 Items, right?

One loaf of bread, 1 quart of milk, a dozen individual servings of yogurt. 3 items or 14?


Hah, but I only had 2 items. My cash cart and my EBT cart!




"Stupid people proliferate because this world has been made safe enough they survive long enough to procreate."

"The people hate the lizards and the lizards rule the people."
"Odd," said Arthur, "I thought you said it was a democracy."
"I did," said Ford, "it is."
"So," said Arthur, hoping he wasn't sounding ridiculously obtuse, "why don't the people get rid of the lizards?"
"It honestly doesn't occur to them. They've all got the vote, so they all pretty much assume that the government they've voted in more or less approximates the government they want."
"You mean they actually vote for the lizards."
"Oh yes," said Ford with a shrug, "of course."
"But," said Arthur, going for the big one again, "why?"
"Because if they didn't vote for a lizard, then the wrong lizard might get in."
 
Posts: 2163 | Location: Two blocks from the Center of the Universe | Registered: December 30, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Little ray
of sunshine
Picture of jhe888
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I wouldn't be irritated by someone with 12 items, but someone with 20 or 25 would hear some grumbling.




The fish is mute, expressionless. The fish doesn't think because the fish knows everything.
 
Posts: 44519 | Location: Texas | Registered: February 10, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
On the DL
Picture of V-Tail
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quote:
Originally posted by jhe888:
I wouldn't be irritated by someone with 12 items, but someone with 20 or 25 would hear some grumbling.
I only had eight. I asked the cashier if I had to go back and get two more items.



A mind is a terrible thing.
 
Posts: 16478 | Location: Central Florida (near Orlando) | Registered: January 03, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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In Walmart yesterday, I'm in line with about $20 of goods. Woman in front of me decides to pay with check.....

She peers at total price on screen.

Digs into her purse for check book.

Digs into her purse for pen.

Opens check book. Book upside down. turns Book right side up.

Begins to write on check. Pen dry, won't write.

Digs into purse for another pen.

Opens check book and writes check. Peers at total charge and fills in check.

Hands check to Clerk who says: "Wrong date on check".

Woman begins to dig in purse for check book.

I said:"Fuck this shit". Grabbed my stuff and moved to another line. Paid with CC and quickly moved on.

Woman was still trying to pay with check as I was leaving.


*******
"Avoid the rush. Procrastinate now".
 
Posts: 5144 | Location: Arizona | Registered: August 17, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Who else?
Picture of Jager
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Take some solace that they captured the quad of bank robbers last Thursday. Cops were tipped and waiting. Thugs find bank doors locked, voila, officers announce party is over. They even caught Coolio!
 
Posts: 2026 | Location: Phoenix, Arizona | Registered: October 30, 2000Reply With QuoteReport This Post
On the DL
Picture of V-Tail
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quote:
Originally posted by Jager:
Take some solace that they captured the quad of bank robbers last Thursday. Cops were tipped and waiting. Thugs find bank doors locked, voila, officers announce party is over. They even caught Coolio!
I think I'm missing something here. I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about.



A mind is a terrible thing.
 
Posts: 16478 | Location: Central Florida (near Orlando) | Registered: January 03, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
A Grateful American
Picture of sigmonkey
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by V-Tail:
quote:
Originally posted by jhe888:
I wouldn't be irritated by someone with 12 items, but someone with 20 or 25 would hear some grumbling.
I only had eight. I asked the cashier if I had to go back and get two more items.


Maff, again... ruining your life.




"the meaning of life, is to give life meaning" I could explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.
 
Posts: 36438 | Location: My Happy Little Tire Swing | Registered: December 20, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
On the DL
Picture of V-Tail
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quote:
Originally posted by sigmonkey:
quote:
Originally posted by V-Tail:
quote:
Originally posted by jhe888:
I wouldn't be irritated by someone with 12 items, but someone with 20 or 25 would hear some grumbling.
I only had eight. I asked the cashier if I had to go back and get two more items.
Maff, again... ruining your life.
Yup. Can't get away from it, like most people can.



A mind is a terrible thing.
 
Posts: 16478 | Location: Central Florida (near Orlando) | Registered: January 03, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
To all of you who are serving or have served our country, Thank You
Picture of Jelly
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Wait untill you get the old lady with 150+ unsorted and out of date coupons in her purse for about 60 dollars worth of stuff. I kid you not it happened to me two times within a year at a safeway years ago. I have not been to safeway since. The 2nd time I left the stuff there and walked out.


...... Boycott NFL.. American against the NFL
 
Posts: 1291 | Registered: March 15, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
member
Picture of henryaz
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quote:
Originally posted by PHPaul:
Curious: How does one count items?

Bread, milk, yogurt. 3 Items, right?

One loaf of bread, 1 quart of milk, a dozen individual servings of yogurt. 3 items or 14?

Easy. If the yogurts were priced by the individual container, then 14 items. If they were on special @ 12 for $1.00, then 3 items.
 
 
Posts: 7267 | Location: South Congress AZ | Registered: May 27, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
On the DL
Picture of V-Tail
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by PHPaul:
Curious: How does one count items?

Bread, milk, yogurt. 3 Items, right?

One loaf of bread, 1 quart of milk, a dozen individual servings of yogurt. 3 items or 14?
Is the bread sliced? If not, the loaf is only one item.



A mind is a terrible thing.
 
Posts: 16478 | Location: Central Florida (near Orlando) | Registered: January 03, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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