Yeah I had the same convo with my realtor for when I'm ready to sell. I will do it myself. My home was built in 1979 and I've done an awful lot to it so I'm confident in everything. I actually want to find anything a reputable inspector can find. I will be charging an awful lot (it's appreciated massively and I've spent a lot) so I'm going to mitigate the bullshit with a stack of paperwork from foundation repair (steel piers) to siding, breaker panel/electrical work, pool renovation, new windows, too much too list. It'll be a nice stack of paperwork and receipts. I won't be in a hurry to sell and I'm going to gouge someone to the point if someone argues on the price, I'll have my realtor add 10k to the listing.
In your situation, yeah I get it.
I'm selling a house now by myself and the buyer that says they want it has a realtor muddying the water. Into the awful inspection phase now.....
No car is as much fun to drive, as any motorcycle is to ride.
Having been in the residential construction business for 37 years I can certainly commiserate!
When we were building high end spec homes (900K+) and the CO was issued I had a couple of clients insist on getting a home inspection. They found things like the outside stairs were too long (?), or the wiring wasn’t up to code (really?)
I asked both guys to show me in the code book where there was a violation and of course they weren’t able to. I told my realtor that they were both barred from any further inspections of our houses...within a year they were out of business because of the shit they tried to pull...
Our Founding Fathers were men who understood that the right thing is not necessarily the written thing. -kkina
|His Royal Hiney|
WTF kind of inspector is that? And who hired him? Usually, it's the realtor that knows a guy he's worked with before.
The inspector isn't going to put his ass on the line for something bad but he's just going to write up what he sees with whatever minor fixes need to be done. Pus there's usually a load of CYA verbiage in the report.
"It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly. Our answer must consist not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual." Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning, 1946.
Home inspectors are the worst. I often get called out to fix their reports. 1/2 aren't code violations and the just don't know their asses from a hole in the ground. If it's the buyer and they ask me to look over everything while I am there I tell them no, you don't want me to do that, because you then have to disclose it to the buyer. One guy insisted on having me do a preinspection of his house before he sold it, I insisted that he didn't, but he was selling to a young couple with a newborn and he wanted to make sure all was well. I practically rewired his whole kitchen, and made numerous repairs to his electrical service to the tune of $6,000 plus with drywall and paint repairs that were needed after I was done. He wrote me a check for my portion and said he was glad he cleared it up for the new buyers. I was amazed by that guy.
On the other side of the coin when I go to do the repairs for the buyer if they agree to buy as is, I point out everything that the inspector missed and then they are usually pissed at seller/inspector/agents. They miss blatant safety concerns and then scare the shit out of people with minor infractions that are not hazardous or minor concerns.
F#$^ them all.
Sic Semper Tyrannis
I have to go behind them all the time... some good some don't have a clue about my certain expertise .... most of what they write up is to cover their very liable asses... I suspect most of them have a lawyer on retainer full time.
I can't imagine having a job where you have to check the polarity of every plug in a house... I think I'd rather stand by the side of the road with a slow/stop sign.
Last house I sold was “as is, no warranty. I showed the new owner all the things I new were defective. 1. A hose bib that froze due to leaving the hose on during the winter. Brazed the crack, doesn’t leak. 2. Toilet in the master bath, broken lid to the toilet, epoxied together. Optional fix would be replacing the toilet with a cheap lo flo that wouldn’t flush anything with out multiple flushes.
The 80 yo house we bought, home inspector showed us everything that is wrong with a 80 year old home with galvanized water pipes, 2 prong outlets, termite damage (no termites!),cracked masonry, 50 yo Steam heat, etc. waste of money IMO.
This house will be sold “as is” when we leave. If they want a home with central air, 3 prong GFCI outlets,Super insulated walls, ceiling and floor. Go by a new home!
|I Am The Walrus|
I work in new home construction. Some buyers will have an inspector come in. Yes, inspect a new home...
I get the reports to my e-mail, some have been as many as 75 pages and it's 99% fluff. Had one take thermo pics of the water heater to show it was working properly. One of the best was when the inspector came and all he found were cosmetic touch ups and questioned why there wasn't another off ridge vent in the roof. Engineer called for and roofers installed the proper amount so he basically green and blue taped the home for me. What a waste of $700.
Had a buyer bring in an inspector a few weeks ago on a two story I was building. Never heard from the inspector the day of or after. Called the buyer to ask if his inspector came by. Was initially met by silence then a "he didn't find a single thing wrong..."
Many of those inspectors "have to" find something wrong in order to justify their $500-700 fee.
I don't consider myself an expert in any field of construction but I am decent enough at most trades to spot what is wrong.
I feel your pain brother.
Just put our house on the market, sold on the first day thank God. Thing was built in 1908.
Buyer's inspector comes out, the man is 5'8" tall, 375lbs easy. Morbidly obese, like one thin mint away from a Mr. Creosote situation. He drops a 67 page report on us. Every single thing he found except for 2 cracked window paines was total bullshit.
-Can't see laundry connections, have plumber inspect.
Yeah buddy, you can't see them because you are so fat and out of shape that you couldn't / wouldn't pull the washer away from the wall.
-Wood stove is of unknown origin, have fire department inspect.
Well, if you had gotten down on one knee and looked behind it you would have seen that it has a gigantic FRANKLIN STOVE Co. with model name and date stamped into the iron.
-Pull down attic stairs unsecure, have licensed contractor make repairs
Oh, they're secure buddy, the fact that you are pushing 400lbs might have something to do with the wobble experienced whilst your giant, purple faced, sweaty self tried to climb them.
-Flashing is missing around dormers. Have licensed contractor inspect.
Well homie, what you're looking at is a 2 year old, $50,000 roof made out of 50 year shingles with all copper flashing, copper down spouts, and copper gutters. Ya see, when a house is 112 years old and has on average 1.5" of concrete stucco thickness for sidng, the flashing cant bee seen. Especially when you are standing on the ground looking up at a dormer that is 35' off the deck.
The icing on the cake was when he saw two old porcelain knobs left on the rafters from when I had the ENTIRE FUCKING HOUSE rewired. Knobs, no wires leading to them, just porcelain knobs.
"House has active knob and tube wiring, have licensed contractor inspect".
|Fighting the good fight|
My new house is new construction. In lieu of a full blown inspection, I did a detailed walkthrough with my friend who is an experienced contractor/home builder.
He verified that it was well made. We found a few cosmetic issues (cracked piece of trim, missing paint around the AC return, etc.) but nothing major other than a slowly leaking toilet wax seal in the guest bathroom. The builder is going to correct the cosmetic issues, reseat the toilet, and replace the water damaged LVP flooring in the bathroom.
That, combined with the 1 year builder's warranty, should be enough.
Maybe as a public service I should have my house inspected. It was originally built in the late 1800's with the volunteer labor of a bunch of gibbons on crack.
This should take a couple inspectors out of the available pool for at least six months. Taking notes will give them so much carpal-tunnel disease they'll go on permanent disability.
Buy your stock in Office Depot now, because the final report will suck all the printer paper out of the supply chain.
I would like to apologize to anyone I have *not* offended. Please be patient. I will get to you shortly.
Believe me, some new homes need to be inspected. There are some shoddily constructed new homes out there. I’ve even seen new homes with the floor system installed incorrectly. An engineer later confirmed what I saw.
Yeah, I just paid $550 to a home inspector who missed tens of thousands of dollars of water damage in my new home. Makes me wonder why I even bothered.
|No, not like |
No liability for the inspector?
“I owe my success to having listened respectfully to the very best advice, and then going away and doing the exact opposite.”
|Not as lean, not as mean,|
Still a Marine
There wasn't for us when they missed the fact the upstairs shower didn't have a trap in the plumbing.
We had a new septic being installed, so they couldn't run water, but they didn't even check. No smoke test, no camera, no pulling the covers and looking.
We tried to fight for it, but our lawyer said it was a lost cause. We could have gone after the title insurance for unpermitted non-code work, but the town didn't pull our occupancy permit (they should've due to the septic gasses) so it was a losing battle.
One thing they do up here to cover their asses, is they refuse to verify code. If questions are raised it's up to a licensed electrician or plumber to verify code.
I shall respect you until you open your mouth, from that point on, you must earn it yourself.
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